Hope Begins to Fade

Brian held me close as we entered the room; all eyes on us. The dance floor was empty, minus Val standing there, snapping pictures.

The reception hall was beautiful; colors everywhere you look. Friends and family sat at the tables; smiles plastered on their faces. Brian held my arm tighter, earning a gaze from me which he just met with a smirk.

“And here enters the bride and groom themselves!” the DJ called.

Brian led me to the huge table in the back which held all our bridesmaids and groomsmen. We sat down while some of our guests began dancing to the songs that played.

“That was so beautiful.” Daytona smiled.

“Oh, Scar, you look so gorgeous!” Jaz exclaimed.

“Thanks you guys. This is such a wonderful night!”

Jimmy came over, holding Serenity in his arms, “Looks like someone wants to see their momma.”

Serenity’s tiny hands stretched out, reaching for me. Laughing, I pulled her into my chest, hugging her while she giggled. Her little pink dress looked so cute on her.

“So, what are plans for later?” Zacky called, winking at Brian.

Brian looked appalled, “Nothing with you, Vengeance.”

“I meant with your wife, dumb ass!” he retorted.

“I’m not the dumb ass here, ZV.”

Shaking my head, I sent a gaze to Matt who was laughing loudly, “Could we please stop this?”

“No, he’s…he’s…” Brian pointed, searching for the words.

“Stupid?” Jimmy piped in.

“Yes!”

“Nu uh!”

“Yeah huh!”

Silence as Brian held onto Zacky’s collar. “Nu uh!” Serenity copied Zacky, clapping her hands together.

Everyone’s eyes lingered on her and laughter erupted in the room.

“See, even your own daughter’s on my side, Gates.” Zacky exclaimed.

“You two are so gay…” Daytona chuckled.

“That’s not nice!” Johnny pouted.

“Aw, Johnny, you’re just a garden gnome, what would you know?” Zacky sighed.

“Hey, I defended you! See when I do that again, fuckface!” Johnny stuck out his tongue.

“Enough!” I called.

“Yeah, this was kinda pointless…” Val held her head.

“What else do you expect with the A7X boys?” Jaz spoke quietly.

“Hey!!!!” now all five members were glaring at her.

“And here we go again…” I told Serenity as she fake pouted. “Aw, you’re so cute!” I held her tighter until she giggled.

“Pictures!” mom called as she held up the camera.

We squeezed everyone in a picture as my dad made faces behind mom. I now love my family…

“And now, ladies and gentlemen…it’s time for the bride and groom’s first dance…” the DJ announced.

“Ready?” Brian took my hand as my mom held Serenity.

“As I’ll ever be.” I replied as he led me to the dance floor.

All these lights are catching up to me
I just can't put insomnia to sleep
I close my eyes but all that I can see
Is someone who I'm never gonna be

We’d chosen this song because it meant a lot to us. As we wracked our brains for a song a few months ago, this came on the radio. The entire room was silent after that…

I hope that you can bring me back
I gotta to make it right

Brian held me tightly and spun me when the chorus kicked in…

And if I fall and crash and burn
At least we both know that I tried
As I crawl those lessons learned
Yeah they remind me I survived
Yeah, yeah, yeah

I was spinning around, in the arms of Synyster Gates, my husband…my everything…

Silence just keeps screaming back at me
The ones I love are lost in memories
And I wish that I could take back what was done
You can only change the person you've become

Memories flooded in my head; the night we met…the first kiss…the first night…

I have to try and find a way
To leave it all behind

I would have done anything, changed everything if I could keep this. These moments would remind me that I’m okay. That I’m alive…

And if I fall and crash and burn
At least we both know that I tried
As I crawl those lessons learned
Yeah they remind me I survived

My past didn’t matter. After tonight, I seem to start a new life. Just me, Brian, Serenity, and the people who care about me…

And I've been hurt and I've been scarred
At least I know that I'm alive
And if I fall and crash and burn
At least we both know that I tried

Brian’s looking at me that way again. He’s gazing into my eyes and I know…oh, I know that this is forever. Our lives have peaked at this point. Our child is in the arms of her grandmother and I’m in the arms of the man who believed in me…

All of the things I tried say
All of the words just got in the way
I'm waiting here, I need your help
Don't leave me down here all by myself

Brian’s smirking as Serenity cheers when we dance by her. Our baby girl is growing up so fast…

If someone had told me that I’d end up married with a kid all with Synyster Gates, I’d have hit them for thinking such crazy things…

And if I fall and crash and burn
At least we both know that I tried
As I crawl those lessons learned
Yeah they remind me I survived

Life has so many twists…there were so many times where I wanted to give up… But I didn’t… it was well worth it, don’t you think?

And I've been hurt and I've been scarred
At least I know that I'm alive
And if I fall and crash and burn
At least we both know that I tried

The dance was over; Brian bowed down as I curtsied to him. He kissed the top of my hand and exited the dance floor to take Serenity from my mother’s arms. Daddy walked up next, smiling as the next song soon began…