Dear Gravity You've Held Me Down

Jenn had been gone for a while, I had cried until I couldn’t produce any more tears and then it was dry heaves which slowed down eventually but I was still depressed. She said she wasn’t going to talk to him, but what else could she be doing that’s taking so long? I know if I was in her situation I’d do the same thing... go against her wishes and yell at the idiot who hurt her but really I just wanted her here being alone wasn’t a good thing to be at the moment.

I crawled off my bed slowly and dragged myself into the kitchen to rummage through the cupboards ‘Do we have any booze?’ flooded my mind, but of course we had none; what kind of cruel torture would that be for Jenn if we did and we told her not to drink it?

But in a draw I did find a plastic bag, I paused staring at the stash in my hand... it was what caused my state of being right now; ok me and it were but still. Would it be smart to do the one thing he hated just because he broke up with me? Confused I felt my body slink down against the wall until I was sitting on the floor, just staring at the bag while my mind traveled far away questioning right and wrong. The front door opened but I barely noticed, I didn’t even notice the fresh batch of tears or the runny nose; why would I notice anything else?

But I did notice when feet stopped in front of me and they sighed, but more so I noticed that the shoes weren’t Jenn’s; of course I knew who’s shoes they were but I didn’t want to look up at him and know it’s real, and lose him again. He crouched down and gently took the bag from my hand with his long fingers, dropping them behind him on the ground before those same long fingers cupped my face and lifted it towards him. My water filled eyes locked with his own brown sad orbs, as his thumbs wiped away my tears. He sat on his bottom spreading out his legs before pulling me into his chest, wrapping his arms around and placing his head on top of mine as I continued to cry.

No words were exchanged once I had calmed down, no words were needed; I knew he was disappointed, and he knew I was broken. As for forgiveness we both knew we were forgiven otherwise we wouldn’t be in each other’s embrace; we just didn’t know what was next. I pulled back slowly and looked back up at him; he leaned down just as slowly and caught my lips softly in a kiss. I pressed back against his lips as my arms wrapped around his neck, from here things turned from a sweet soft moment to a more desperate needing one; and it was no surprise when we ended up in my bedroom, making up in the best way possible.