When Forever Ends

There are things that I just don’t understand. How someone can make Marley cry is one of the things that baffle me. How can anyone stand the sight of such innocent and happy person in tears. I can’t stand it at all. It makes want to punch people. Mainly, Vince. How could he be such an asshole about this. He was supposed to love Marley. He said he loved her and this is what he did? He fucking broke her heart. She never thought he’d react so badly. How was she supposed to know Vince has issues with his father that fueled the whole thing.

So when I come home with the last of my belongings in boxes, with tears threatening to spill out of my eyes, and I find Marley crying while Jenna tries to comfort her. Then I find out what that asshole did to her. I am quick to jump into action, talking all about the plan Marley and I had made before we even moved to California.

“Seriously, do you want me to go through with it. I’ll do it. I have nothing to leave behind, Marley. My contract ends in less than a month. I have no reason to stay. You have no reason to stay. So let’s just go. We can move to New York City, we can take Milo. We can start all over...again.” It’s a cowardly thing to do...but I never said I wasn’t a coward.

Marley shakes her head no. “Let’s just wait until your contract ends.” She says sniffling. I know she’s saying this because she’s hoping that everything will blow over by then. I’m pretty sure it won’t, not for me anyway. I’m done with Bennett and all of his shit.

I don’t ever want to fish his head out of another toilet, warn him when a girl is cheating on him, throw out the moldy bread before he eats it, drive his ass everywhere, help him with any goddamn tricks, or help him bullshit his way out whatever trouble he gets himself into with out so much as a thank you. I am done, I’ve let him walk all over me for far too long.

But I nod. If she wants to wait a month...we’ll wait a month.

Christmas fucking Eve and I have a fucking meeting with Dave about renewing my contract. Little does he know that I’m not renewing anything. I sit in the office, none of the assholes are in sight...thankfully. Dave walks in with a big smile, that’s all gonna change. Okay, I have a new contract for you here. You can have your lawyer look over it, I’m sure he’ll tell you it’s”

“I’m done.” I say flatly.

“What?” Dave asks furrowing his bushy brows.

“I’m done. I’m moving to New York City.” I say leaning back in the chair casually.

“What about the guys, they’re”

“I don’t give a rat’s ass about the guys anymore.”

“Not even Ace or Jake.”

“Especially not Ace.” I say through clenched teeth.

“Well, I can give your number to some people I know in the city if you want.” Dave suggests. I’m starting to like Dave. He doesn’t ask questions and he’s helping me. Good guy.

“I’d appreciate it.” I say smiling slightly.

“Alright, well...It was nice working with you Shayne. I hope you find what you’re looking for in New York.” I smile politely and shake Dave’s hand, thanking him for helping me out so much.

“Call Milo.” Marley orders when I get in from seeing Dave. “We’re leaving.”

“Tonight?” I ask unsurely.

“Tonight.” I nod and walk into my the kitchen. Eating a blueberry waffle Marley made for me earlier. Marley was obviously done waiting for Vince to show up. I can’t believe Ford is such a pussy.

“Hello,” Milo answers sounding extremely bored.

“Hey, Milo.”

“Hey, Shayne.”

“What are you doing?” I ask casually.

“Nothing, what are you doing?”

“Eating a blueberry waffle.” I answer, staring out the window of Marley’s kicthen.

“Me too.” he answers

“You just said you weren’t doing anything.”

“I didn’t think eating a blueberry waffle counted as doing anything. I thought doing something meant like...playing fucking Monopoly or some shit like that.” Leave Milo to say something like that.

“Nah, I meant like anything at all.” I say for future reference.

“Yeah...well I’m eating blueberry waffles and watching Sesame Street.” He would watch Sesame Street.

“Hey, do you want to like...move to New York City with me and Marley?”

“Like...now?”

“Tonight we’re leaving.”

“Shit yes, dude! I am so fucking sick of this town! Lemme go pack my shit up, I’ll see you later.”

I hang up with Milo and then take my car to go rent a fucking u-haul. I let Marley drive my car back. I get our neighbor, Bob, to help me pack all our shit away in the truck. Marley opts out because of the baby...as she should. Then we drive to Milo’s. Milo doesn’t have a lot of shit to bring. A few shitty couches, a bed, a nice television, a refrigerator, and then a bunch of weird shit.

And once it’s all packed up, Milo follows behind Marley and in my car. Marley’s car being hooked to the back of the truck. And we start our drive, telling no one. Just leaving, all the shit behind us...for the second time.

It takes us a few days, but when we get to New York we were lucky to find a nice sized apartment that the three of us could live in until we got ourselves jobs and our own places to live. I was lucky that my phone survived in Milo’s toilet. Though I was hesitant to use, but when I got a call from Dave’s friend in New York I gladly answered the phone. I was set up to met with him a week from the day he called me. He had big plans for me...or so he said.

Then there’s my son. Gavin. After I had him, I left him with this old couple I met when I used to visit their bookstore all the time. They were nice people, and they promised to take care of him until I was ready to take him. Gavin knew his mom lived far away, and that I love him...he just didn’t understand why he lived with “Grandma and Grampa” instead of his mom. You really can’t have a little boy, who’s only turning six, understand that being raped forced me to leave him with those people and flee from my parents...who thought I willingly had sex and had gotten pregnant when I was fucking fourteen.

Maybe that’s why Marley’s parents liked me so much. Maybe I was just charity to them. It doesn’t matter now. As soon as I get my own place, I get to have my son.

I drive to New Jersey, remembering exactly how to get to the book store. The bell above the door rings when I enter. A white haired woman peeks over the counter.

“Shayne?” She asks squinting at me through her glasses.

I smile weakly and wave. “Hey, Mrs. Lucas.” I greet her shyly.

“Shayne! Look at you! You’re so grown up! Come here!” Mrs. Lucas throws her arms around me in a hug. I gladly hug her back. Mrs. Lucas begins to couch violently, she told me in her last letter she wasn’t doing too well. Mr. Lucas passed last year...and she hasn’t been feeling so well herself.

The store is a mess. Thick layers of dust coat the tops of every self. I can imagine she has a part time keeping up with both the store and my son. I feel guilty for that.

The bell above the door rings again. “Gramma!” a little voice yells. My heart begins to beat extremely fast. I turn around and stare at the little boy in amazement. He was wearing a red backpack that was much too big for him. His jet black hair looks like it was blowing around in the wind. This cheeks are red from the cold, the gray coat he has on is way too big. His skin is tan, even now in the dead o winter and his big gray eyes look up at me in wonder. “Hi.” he says shyly looking at me.

“Hi.” I smile, feeling myself begin to cry.

“Gavin, this is your mommy.” Mrs. Lucas say through a cough. The little boy’s face lights up and he runs at my legs and hugs them.

“Hi, buddy. I’ve missed you.” I say picking up my son and hugging him tightly too my chest.

“I missed you too.” he says and kisses my nose. I laugh at how adorable he is, but the happy tears just keep falling. I watch Gavin read a small book, while Mrs. Lucas talks to me.

“Shayne, you have to take him. I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry. I can’t.” I understand.

“I know, Mrs. Lucas. I’m sorry, it took me so long. I’m sorry that it’s been such a trouble. I just didn’t know who else to leave him with.”

“Dear, it was no trouble. I love Gavin like my grandson, I just physically cannot do this anymore. I’m too weak. I can’t provide him with what he needs, look at his clothes. You need to take him, lovie. I’m going to sell the store.”

“Don’t sell it. My friend Marley is a business major! She can turn this place around!”

“If she can save it, she can have it.” Mrs. Lucas says.

I go back to the apartment with Gavin, and all of his things. I tell Marley she now has a bookstore ans she’s thrilled. Milo, he’s just happy he won’t have to resort to selling drugs anymore. Gavin loves Milo. Like mother, like son.

I think this time, everything will work out...for good