Just Keep Breathing

It had been two weeks since the whole fight with James, and it was two weeks before Oli and the guys left for tour. Currently, I’m having completely mixed feelings about that. Half of me is super excited for the guys, the other have is being selfish and wanting Oliver to myself.

“Whatchu thinkin’ about, hon?” Oli asked in a whisper next to my ear. At the moment, the usual gang was seated in Tessa’s living room watching some HBO movie that was playing. We were just wasting time until a party tonight.

“You.” I whispered back, giving a flirty smile. He raised an eyebrow at me with a smirk playing at his lips.

Now that we didn’t have to sneak around or hide our relationship, it was becoming much easier for me to show my feelings for Oli. Even so, I was usually a bit more reserved while in the presence of other people. I wouldn’t want to be a hypocrite due to the fact I usually hate touchy-feely couples.

Oliver stood up and grabbed my hand, pulling me with him. We got looks from everyone but brushed them off as we left the living room. Now in the odd little wreck room in the back of Tessa’s house, and out of everyone’s sight, Oli and I mutually connected at the lips and kissed hungrily. We fell back onto the ratty old couch and pushed off a few xBox controllers with our lips still together.

“This is awkward.” I muttered into the kiss as Oli’s hands slipped up my shirt and headed for my bra. I felt him smile but he didn’t agree or disagree, but instead continued to let his hands roam. Was I the only one who found it awkward to be making sexual advances while on your friend’s couch?

“We did lock the door when we came in here, right?” I asked as Oli slipped my shirt over my head and discard it to the floor. He nodded and kissed up and down my neck and collar bone. I was going to stop talking.

Now with both of us completely topless, I started attacking Oli’s belt. It’s odd how within two weeks I’d become so comfortable with him. It’s not like we were jumping our bones constantly now. To think of it, last time had been about a week ago.

“I dunno if I’ve got anythin’.” Oli whined and pulled out his wallet, looking inside for a condom. With no luck he groaned and nuzzled his head into my cleavage.

Lack of condoms didn’t stop Oli from wanting to fool around. Half way through me tugging down his pants, if you know where I’m going with this this, a light knocking came from the door. I barely heard Oli mutter a few obscenities before calling out for the person to talk.

“Don’t mean to interrupt, but we’re leaving for that party in a few minutes.” It was Tessa and I could hear the amusement in her voice. I however wasn’t too amused, and neither was Oli who was now having to deal with his own little problem.

&&

The party was loud and crazy and I was completely lost. It had been over an hour since arriving at the strange house and I’d spent the last thirty minutes with Oli drinking only to lose a few minutes ago. I really didn’t enjoy being by myself.

“Have you seen Oli?” I had to shout at Tessa over the music while I looked for my estranged boyfriend. She shook her head with a frown and turned back to look at Curtis. Wow, what a help.

Grabbing another drink from the kitchen I walked off towards the front of whoever’s house this was. My plan was to get out of the packed house and into the calm air outside. Of course distractions tend to make us forget what our original plan was.

So here’s where things get complicated, where my usual indecisiveness comes into play and I have that little mind battle. Here’s the one for tonight: did I want to see what I just did, or would I rather pretend that I didn’t?

Confused? Well here’s what I see. Right by the front door there is a hallway leading down to a bathroom and an office. Between me and the end of the hall were two bodies awkwardly placed together and kissing. But it wasn’t just any two bodies, no, one of them wasmy Oli.

I guess Tessa had followed me because soon I felt her hand on my shoulder as she witnessed the scene like I was. I glanced at her, noticing the pure hate plastered on her face. Turning to face her I shook my head and spoke, “Just split them up, please? I’m going to go drink until I forget that I even saw this.”

She started to protest, knowing better than me that alcohol was not a good way to deal with this, but I was gone before she had a chance to pursued me out of it. Instead, she took her defeat and went to separate Oli from the blonde whore.

Meanwhile, I wandered into the kitchen in search for booze. I figured if I could drink until I couldn’t remember then I wouldn’t be hurt over it. Plus, if I couldn’t remember then James wouldn’t know and I would have a huge “I told you so” to deal with. Win, win situation.

One shot, two shots, three shots, how many shots? I’d lost count after the gross liquid stopped burning down my throat and I no longer had to ask for a refill. Who ever this strange blob of a person was knew how to kept my small shot glass full.

Four, maybe five? I should probably stop now. I definitely didn’t hold alcohol well. Drunkenness was sweeping over me fast. Could I even remember what brought me into the kitchen? Sure I could, Oli with someone other than me.

Jesus, I am way overreacting.

With that thought in my head, I backed away from the kitchen and turned, head spinning - or was it the house? -, and went to look for someone familiar. Before I had found anyone, they had found me. Tessa to be specific.

“Come on Sweets, let’s get you home.” She said nicely. I nodded and let her support me as we walked out of the house.