Just Keep Breathing

There was an awkward, almost uneasy, feeling in the car today. It was just Oliver and I driving to some party to meet up with everyone else. I think the awkwardness came from the fact it was a party we were about to attend; Oliver didn’t want to screw up again and it showed on his face as he drove.

“Oli, calm down.” I assured him and took his right hand off the wheel before lacing it with mine. He squeeze my hand and nodded, attempting to relax a bit. Neither of us liked this tension.

We continued to drive in quietness until he pulled up to a house I didn’t recognize. I got out quicker than Oli and walked to his side of the car as he exited the door. He held his hand out for me to take again and laced our fingers together; his tattooed ones coving mine.

Everyone in the house seemed to know Oliver. He got greetings from everyone as we walked through, hand in hand, to the kitchen. Tessa pulled me away from Oli for a moment to hug me before handing me a cup and walking off with Curtis. She looked over he shoulder and winked before disappearing up the stairs.

I attached myself back on Oli’s side, wanting to feel him. Lately, though neither of us seemed to mind, we both had been very clingy. I always wanted to be with him one way or another and he always wanted to have some contact with me.

Thirty minutes and two drinks later Oli and I were seated on some random couch with me straddling him as we kissed. To any onlooker the scene was becoming very provocative very fast. Oliver’s hand slipped from my waist down to my ass as he, if possible, pulled me closer. It was amazing how a few drinks for confidence could make us comfortable with each other again.

Pulling away from his lips I kissed his neck lightly before whispering in his ear, “I’m not feeling the whole party thing, want to get out of here?”

He nodded and picked me up off him, before getting up himself. Latching hands again, it was like we couldn’t get out of the house fast enough.

&&

“Your belt is obnoxious.” I mumbled into Oliver’s neck as I struggled to pull it out of the belt loops. Finally, I detached it from his body and chucked it on to the living room floor. We were currently in the little entry way of his house.

As I started to pull his shirt off of him, I failed to multitask. I couldn’t take off his shirt and walk to his bedroom at the same time. To fix this problem, Oli hoisted me up off the ground and into his embrace. I wrapped my legs around his waist and finished pulling off his shirt, running my hands down his chest.

Oli walked forward, pushing me against a his bedroom door, letting his hands roam my butt and thighs. With my legs still around him, I pulled away from the kiss and discarded my own shirt before finding a way to open his door.

Before falling backwards with the door, Oliver let me down gently and lead me into his room, shutting his door with his foot. He picked me up again, my legs looping around him once more as he set me down on his bed, his mouth kissing all of my neck and chest.

“What are you doing still dressed?” He asked me playfully before tugging at my pants, skillfully removing them before crawling to hover over me and kissing my collar bone.

I always felt a little more confident when like this with Oli. You’d think a lack of clothes would make my confidence decline, but it increased it; I knew that, even if I didn’t take action, I was in control the whole time and that just fueled my ego.

It wasn’t too long after my pants were gone that my bra and panties followed along with Oliver’s boxers. He attached his lips to mine as he dug around in his bed side table, shuffling around all the random contents of it before finding what he wanted.

It was cute every time we found ourselves in this position - no pun intended - because Oli always asked me if I was sure. No matter the countless times I said yes, he always kissed the tender skin under my ear and whispered, making sure. And each time I gave a small nod and pulled his body down on to mine, making our hips and lips collide.

&&

A while later, I always lost track of time, Oli rolled off of my body, his chest moving rapidly to regain his breath. I rolled myself into his embrace and let him wrap his arms around me. I currently had this bliss feeling; one I got a lot when I was around Oli.

Tessa had only tried to convince me it meant I loved him about a hundred times over. I never admitted it though, I think I’m scared to. With what recently happened plus him leaving soon, I didn’t want my heart to be able to break into a million pieces.

“Hey Elle?” Oli whispered, shifting next to me so he could kiss my shoulder. I wiggled closer to him and mumbled, my way of saying “yes?”. He kissed my shoulder again and let his lips linger, I knew he was about to speak. “I’m not quite sure ‘ow to get this out in the open, ‘cause I don’t usually say it, but I think I love ya.”

I froze, I think even my heart stopped. This was big news; I mean seriously, Oli loving someone? I must be dreaming right? Sex must have wore me out and I fell asleep right after. Except his lips kissed my shoulder again, waiting for me to respond.

Rolling over, I faced him; our eyes locking on each other. I lifted my hand up and placed it on his cheek, running my fingers over his skin down to his jaw then back up to his forehead. He closed his eyes as I trailed my finger over his lips before pulling my hand back and pushing my lips to kiss him.

I didn’t plan on saying it back, I really didn’t. It wasn’t until a few minutes later, when our cute kiss was over, that I laid as close as I could to him and tucked my head into the crease of his neck, touching my lips to his neck before speaking quietly, “I think that I love you too."