‹ Prequel: A Letter To Remember Me
Status: Finished!
I Know I'm Not The One You Call When You Are Alone
High School. 16th Birthday.
“Josh, are you ready yet?” I asked my best friend. It was his 16th birthday and we were having a party for him. I had been ready for about the past 10 minutes but the birthday boy was taking his sweet time in the bathroom.
“I am now.”
“Finally!” I said throwing my arms in the air. I turned round and looked at him, my breath caught in my throat, he looked stunning. He was wearing a simple pair of black skinny jeans and a white shirt with a black tie.
“Uhh uhh… you scrub up well.” I smiled.
“Thanks, you look beautiful by the way.” My heart swooned. I was wearing a black dress with a yello top half and yellow buttons along with a pair of black heels.
The party was being held in his house so we made our way downstairs and our friends Max, Matt, Chris & Dan were sat there on the couch.
“Happy Birthday man.” They said, standing up and patting him on the back.
“Thanks guys.” The lads handed hin an envelope each, a birthday card with money in it, because seriously, what do you buy a guy who doesn’t want anything?
People started arriving and the music was playing loud, whoever was there were already dancing and having a good time.
He really deserved this party and I was just so happy that I could be there to share it with him.
“Having a good day babe?” I asked my best friend.
“All the better for having you here.” I blushed. It was times like these that I wasn’t sure whethere he actually liked me, or if it was just me reading into little things.
Joshua pulled me up onto the 'dancefloor' (his back garden patio) as If I Fail by Cartel came on. It seemed very suiting to the pair of us – well from my point of view anyway – because of the lyrics.
He put his arms round my waist, and my arms round his neck and we sung to each other.
Time to go, this is goodbye she said,
does it ever get easier to live like this?
And kiss the cheek, or I can't kiss you anymore,
and I, I would honestly love you now,
but I would lovingly let you down...
Oh, I have the hardest time resisting you, and, oh, if you...
If only he knew how true that statement was to me.
If you feel the same way,
then how can we be friends?
He's right you know, we can't go on like this.
And oh I'd try to give you everything
and if I fail, well then I fail,
but at least I gave you something I could put my trust in
Thing is, did he feel the same way? Does he feel about me, the way I have felt about him for the past 10 or more years.
Giving up the heart - it makes the difference,
and how can you afford to settle down?
When I, I would promise to love you now,
but I would lovingly let you down...
Oh, I have the hardest time resisting you, and, oh, if you...
If you feel the same way,
then how can we be friends?
He's right you know, we can't go on like this.
And oh I'd try to give you everything
and if I fail, well then I fail, but at least I gave you something...
It's better than silence,
give me one good reason.
It's better than silence,
(You know)
give me one good reason.
(You know)
To leave this in silence.
no know you don't have a good reason.
If you feel the same way,
then how can we be friends?
He's right you know, we can't go on like this.
I'd try to give you everything
and if I fail, well then I fail, but at least I gave you something...
uh oh, uh oh
It's better than silence,
uh oh, uh oh uh uh uh uh oh
it's better than silence.
We stared into each others eyes and he was inching closer to me when –
“Josh, fancy a dance?” some blonde girl asked him. Urgh!!! Not now lady! Can’t you see we are having a moment. I could have killed that little son of a bitch. Here was my moment to kiss the guy I’m freaking in love with and then this girl - this thing - just goes and does this. Oh this is war!
“No sorry, I’m dancing with Alexa.” He smiled. HA bitch fucking ha.
All throughout the night, plenty of people came up to his wishing him happy birthday and asked for a dance. He happily accepted the birthday wishes but said no to every single person regarding a dance. He constantly claimed that ‘every dance is Lexi’s’.
Josh was called up to the decking area to say a speech.
“Hi everyone, I just want to thank everyone for coming to my party, it means a lot that you bothered. Well first I’d like to thank my parents to having me and for always standing by me, my big sister Elissa who is just amazing and the best sister I could have ever wished for. My boys for sticking by me even when I’m stupid like this speech and I hope one day our band will rule the world. And last but not least, my best friend of 12 years and the most special girl in the world, Alexa Leanne Miller. I want to thank her for putting this fantastic party together and for inviting everyone. Also for being here for me through the good and the bad times, for picking me up when I fall, for actually giving a damn about me and for sticking around even when I have been an absolute ass to her. I owe that girl my life. I love that girl to pieces and I hope I never lose her.” My heart was beating 90 to the dozen, I thought it would beat right out of my chest. “Come up here.” I stepped upon the deck and stood next to him feeling a little embarrassed. “This girl is the reason I wake up in the morning and she gives me a reason to live. I love you Lex.” He grinned.
“I love you too Josh.” If only you knew just how much Joshua.
“I am now.”
“Finally!” I said throwing my arms in the air. I turned round and looked at him, my breath caught in my throat, he looked stunning. He was wearing a simple pair of black skinny jeans and a white shirt with a black tie.
“Uhh uhh… you scrub up well.” I smiled.
“Thanks, you look beautiful by the way.” My heart swooned. I was wearing a black dress with a yello top half and yellow buttons along with a pair of black heels.
The party was being held in his house so we made our way downstairs and our friends Max, Matt, Chris & Dan were sat there on the couch.
“Happy Birthday man.” They said, standing up and patting him on the back.
“Thanks guys.” The lads handed hin an envelope each, a birthday card with money in it, because seriously, what do you buy a guy who doesn’t want anything?
People started arriving and the music was playing loud, whoever was there were already dancing and having a good time.
He really deserved this party and I was just so happy that I could be there to share it with him.
“Having a good day babe?” I asked my best friend.
“All the better for having you here.” I blushed. It was times like these that I wasn’t sure whethere he actually liked me, or if it was just me reading into little things.
Joshua pulled me up onto the 'dancefloor' (his back garden patio) as If I Fail by Cartel came on. It seemed very suiting to the pair of us – well from my point of view anyway – because of the lyrics.
He put his arms round my waist, and my arms round his neck and we sung to each other.
Time to go, this is goodbye she said,
does it ever get easier to live like this?
And kiss the cheek, or I can't kiss you anymore,
and I, I would honestly love you now,
but I would lovingly let you down...
Oh, I have the hardest time resisting you, and, oh, if you...
If only he knew how true that statement was to me.
If you feel the same way,
then how can we be friends?
He's right you know, we can't go on like this.
And oh I'd try to give you everything
and if I fail, well then I fail,
but at least I gave you something I could put my trust in
Thing is, did he feel the same way? Does he feel about me, the way I have felt about him for the past 10 or more years.
Giving up the heart - it makes the difference,
and how can you afford to settle down?
When I, I would promise to love you now,
but I would lovingly let you down...
Oh, I have the hardest time resisting you, and, oh, if you...
If you feel the same way,
then how can we be friends?
He's right you know, we can't go on like this.
And oh I'd try to give you everything
and if I fail, well then I fail, but at least I gave you something...
It's better than silence,
give me one good reason.
It's better than silence,
(You know)
give me one good reason.
(You know)
To leave this in silence.
no know you don't have a good reason.
If you feel the same way,
then how can we be friends?
He's right you know, we can't go on like this.
I'd try to give you everything
and if I fail, well then I fail, but at least I gave you something...
uh oh, uh oh
It's better than silence,
uh oh, uh oh uh uh uh uh oh
it's better than silence.
We stared into each others eyes and he was inching closer to me when –
“Josh, fancy a dance?” some blonde girl asked him. Urgh!!! Not now lady! Can’t you see we are having a moment. I could have killed that little son of a bitch. Here was my moment to kiss the guy I’m freaking in love with and then this girl - this thing - just goes and does this. Oh this is war!
“No sorry, I’m dancing with Alexa.” He smiled. HA bitch fucking ha.
All throughout the night, plenty of people came up to his wishing him happy birthday and asked for a dance. He happily accepted the birthday wishes but said no to every single person regarding a dance. He constantly claimed that ‘every dance is Lexi’s’.
Josh was called up to the decking area to say a speech.
“Hi everyone, I just want to thank everyone for coming to my party, it means a lot that you bothered. Well first I’d like to thank my parents to having me and for always standing by me, my big sister Elissa who is just amazing and the best sister I could have ever wished for. My boys for sticking by me even when I’m stupid like this speech and I hope one day our band will rule the world. And last but not least, my best friend of 12 years and the most special girl in the world, Alexa Leanne Miller. I want to thank her for putting this fantastic party together and for inviting everyone. Also for being here for me through the good and the bad times, for picking me up when I fall, for actually giving a damn about me and for sticking around even when I have been an absolute ass to her. I owe that girl my life. I love that girl to pieces and I hope I never lose her.” My heart was beating 90 to the dozen, I thought it would beat right out of my chest. “Come up here.” I stepped upon the deck and stood next to him feeling a little embarrassed. “This girl is the reason I wake up in the morning and she gives me a reason to live. I love you Lex.” He grinned.
“I love you too Josh.” If only you knew just how much Joshua.