Killing Joy

I exhaled happily and walked into the RV with smile appeared on my face. Finally, we’re official I just couldn’t believe that WE’RE DATING FOR REAL! I let out a semi-loud giggle when I walked but then stopped abruptly.

Gasping. Trying to catch some breath.

There laid Caleb with his laptop was watching some nasty movie that happened to be smut.

Oh my god.

Caleb heard my giggle and then turned his face to me. His face was uneasy and I could hear his breath was uneven because of that movie. My jaw was dropped and he suddenly closed his laptop tightly still watching me.

I dunno how to respond. He cleared his throat.

“Uhhmm..” he started groggily.

I shook my head and ran toward the back of RV. Wow, boys. I couldn’t believe that he’s still up just for watching that proscribed movie. I sighed and decided to take a shower. I should have known showering in the middle of midnight just made me worse. But I tried to ignored it by singing in the shower.

When the droplets showered me, I felt so fresh. I pulled my mind back and pictured Zach again. I was freaking happy for it, I couldn’t wait to be with him again in the morning. To feel him beside me.

I quivered very hard when I finished showering. I wore a robe and rummaged through my suitcase. Caleb was still up for the movie as he watched me with his big eyes and for some reasons, I felt uncomfortable. I hurriedly took everything I need from the suitcase and brought them to the bathroom so I could wear them.

My eyes’ lid became heavy as I reached the bed and snuggled to the pillow. I breathed in and smiled. Well, I regretted smiling that time because everything started with my smile.

“You look happy” I heard Caleb stated. I flickered open my eyes and inhaled then exhaled. I spotted him was watching me with a smile.

“Nothing… night is just so beautiful” trust me, I wasn’t high that time. Maybe it was because of the affect of being so damn sleepy so I didn’t know what I was talking about. But hello, that night was incredibly beautiful. I saw an aura and a field of stars.

Caleb scoffed, “Anyway, where have you been?”

“Watching sky. The field of stars” I said hinting melancholy tone. “With my Zach..” I added dreamily and shut my eyes.

“Your Zach?” he snorted. “You both make a couple of freaks” he said directly making me opened my eyes again. I glared to him but he seemed not buying it. What happened with our deal about no more arguing?

“I don’t care. But for your information, ginger head, we’re official” I blahed and decided to ignore him by trying to sleep. For like a minute, I heard something.

My bed was squeaked and it was shifted. I saw Caleb laid next to me with his head rested on his palm watching me like an eagle. I furrowed my brows and got up from my sleep form confusingly at him.

He approached his body to me and put his hand on my hip as he drew an imaginary circular on it.
“What are you doing??” I asked questionably snatching his hand away from my hips.

“I don’t like him, Nicks” he said softly

I sighed, I never understood how Caleb’s bethink of people. He just judged them and then he banned me to date Zach. I never knew what his problem to him was. I thought Zach was the most adorable thing I’d ever known. I liked Zach, but why in the hell Caleb never wanted me being with Zach? There must be a reason behind that.

“Why?” I asked

He fell in silence and leaned his body closer so he could bring my body to him.
“I just don’t. He doesn’t deserve you”

“You..” I groaned “Why do you always…” I tried not to become angry of his stupid reason… and then in my astonishment, he cut me by kissing me gently.

“Caleb…!” I shrieked as I wiped his lips from mine.

“Why do you hate me so much?? Why.. why you have to date that freak? Why it has to be Zach? Not any others?!” his voice was curt and then I just realized he was already on top of me with his both hands pinning up my hands. “Why…”

“Let go, you freak! I never hate you.. I’ve said that to you.. now.. get your ass off from me..!”

He paused for a moment.

And then spread a smirk on his face in millisecond later.

“And why do I have to hear you?” he started to muster his infamous smirk again and leaned his face for like an inch from mine. His breath tickled my cheeks as I observed his breath was uneasy and heavy.

“Caleb.. you.. perv! You’re horny!! GET THE FUCK OFF!” I fought his grasp on my pinned wrist helplessly. He was horny, because of that stupid porn stuff. Shit! I was in danger this time. I should go! I should escape from him.

You know what was his response? He just chuckled and kissed my cheek sending shivering sensation on my ear.

“I swear, if something happened, I’ll call the cops and scream” I threatened him as he looked me deeply in the eyes.

“Well.. “ he smiled crookedly and without hesitation kissed me gently on the lips. I moved my face away from his and groaned.

“You dickwad! What the fuck!”

“Is that how Zach kisses you? In such that way?” he asked “I could do that better, dollface..” he hissed when finally my hand came to slap him. I hated whenever he kissed me when he’s in the state of perversion. Even his kiss was soft and gentle. Like full of love.
He startled a bit of my slap but then he leaned on again and pressed his lips against mine deeper than before.

“Stop it!! STOP!” I barked pushing his chest away from me, but he held my hand as he started to swallow my lips again and again. I fought the kiss so hard but he shoved his tongue and discovered my mouth. His lips sent shocks through my body wherever he swallowed mine. His hands carressed my body, sometimes greedily but mostly gentle. I gasped slightly as his hand went under my PJs, I couldn’t help escaping a low moan from inside my mouth.

His lips then attached themselves to my neck, lightly sucking and pulling on my skin making me groan. I glared to him biting his earlobe roughly as I saw it grew scarlet.
“NICKY! You hurt me!” he complained

“So get off from you, perv!” I yelled. But he didn’t hear me, he grunted and I found his hands traveled to my tip of PJs shirt and ripped it off. I’d come to blush because now he could see my purple lacey bra and it was so embarrassing. I really should stop him by that time, he couldn’t do this to me!

“Not now, Nicky…” his voice was harsh as he attacked my lips again and again. His eyes were shut as if he enjoyed every single moment he had with me. While his lips nipped my neck, his hands now removed from my hands to my pants and easily pulled them off. Oh God, no.. now I realized, he was doing something that I wouldn’t able to stop.

“God, you’re so mouthwatering.. Nicks..” he breathed heavily when he was on my neck.

My hands tried their hard to push him off from me but it was just useless, he didn’t let me escaped. And he was freaking heavy if it compared with my petite body.

“HELP!” I screamed at the top of my lungs when I finally managed myself. He just giggled and he stripped off his tshirt and kicked off his jeans. I could see hisamazing bare chest, there was a tattoo that I saw when we first time met.

“Easy, girl… this is not gonna be long…”

“Caleb! Are you insane!! Stop it! You don’t want to do it!! You’re drunk!!” all I could say. Because I was sure if only he wasn’t drunk that night, he wouldn’t do this to me.

“Shhh.. calm down.. everything is gonna be okay” he said sliding my underwear easily and unclasped my bra. Shit! Now I was totally naked in front of him. I could feel tears were mustering from my corner of eyes as I begged him to stop.

“No Nicky, don’t cry…” he said smiling crookedly and this time he kicked off his boxer

He smirked and I felt his tip push through me and I felt something rip painfully. “Jeez.. You’re tight!” he half yelled and I was already crying.

He pulled out slowly but just before he fully exited he slammed back in and a short scream burst out of me.
“No please.. please don’t do this to me, Caleb.. you’re freaking drunk..” I sobbed very hard feelling so dirty. I just lost my virginity from him. And he freaking raped me. This bastard.. i.. I didn’t know what to do..

He never cared of me and then he thrusted repeatedly into me and I was moaning again and again. I couldn’t help but moan from his thrust. Somehow it felt good but… I couldn’t take it, I never loved him. Having sex with the one you never loved was just like disaster for me. I felt so sorrow. This is so miserable..

“Shit!! Your moans are driving me crazy” he muttered when he pulled away watching me from above me. His eyes darted on my naked body hungrily. And he repeated the thing again.

“You’re so beautiful, Nicky…” he said pressing his lips on my breast softly.

When it was finished, he fell down next to me panting and sweating. On the other way, I was quivering like crazy and didn’t dare to see him. I just cried so hard, nobody could save me.

He breathed next to me and wrapped my fragile body closer to mine. I was like a whore. He used me.

“You’re amazing, babe…” he said whispering through my ears while I was deeply broke into horrifying tears. I even couldn’t say a word, I was really in trauma. I never thought my first time would be a rape like this.

My body was shaking like crazy and Caleb just wrapped me with his strong arms. He brought me closer and closer until my back pressed tightly into his sweaty chest. I could felt his breath on my hair then he kissed my nape.

I was very mute. I couldn’t express myself at the moment. Something held me, and I knew it would grow worse.

I thought I would plan some suicide in the morning.