In the Best Damn Dress I Own

"You're not going to tell him are you." Frank said it more of a statement the a question before he sighed. I sat down at the table in our two bedroom apartment. I shook my head as I wiped the lipstick from my mouth. I would keep the eyeliner on because that's just what Frank and I did.

"Not if I don't have to. He would completely freak out! You have no idea what the look on his face was like when I told him I was gay. It'll be ten times worse if I tell him I'm a cross-dresser." Frank shook his head and smiled.

Just then there was a knock at the door. Frank and I had ordered a pizza so I grabbed the money off the table and made my way to the door, still wearing my dress I had worn to the interview. I swung the door open and raised the money up.

"Here you go k-k-k..." I froze in mid-sentence. Standing in the doorway was my younger brother, Mikey. He seemed to do a double take before his eyes widened in disbelief. His mouth opened and closed like fish out of water. I couldn't help but giggle on the inside.

"G-Gerard? Is that you?" Mikey said, stumbling over his words. He was obviously still in shock.

I hung my head and answered his question.

"Yes Mikey, it's me. I was hoping you wouldn't see this." I continued looking down, my eyes not wanting to meet his. Just then Frank got up and walked over. I sighed to myself. He was my hero.

"Hey Mikey. I see you've seen our little secret." Frank said, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Yeah. Do you mind if I come in. I'm feeling a little lightheaded." Mikey asked. Frank ushered him into the house and I followed on his heals. We all sat down on the couch. Frank sat between Mikey and me, trying to ease the tension.

"Gerard, why did you feel you couldn't tell me about...this?" Mikey asked, looking at me. My eyes glazed over as I thought about the day I had told him my first secret.

I was standing in the basement, alone. All at once Mikey came crashing through the door. He pinned me up against the wall with surprising strength. I smelt alcohol on his breath, which was strange, seeing as he was only fifteen. On the other hand, you really didn't know with the crowd he was hanging out with lately.

"I heard you're a faggot big brother. Is that true?" Mikey asked. I whimpered and he slammed me against the wall harder when I didn't reply.

"Answer me you queer!" Mikey yelled in my face. I nodded and he let me go. I crawled to the corner of the room. Mikey then went up the stairs and passed out in his bed. I spent that entire evening cowering in fear of my little brother. I was so fucking pathetic.

"Gerard? Hello? Is anybody in there?" Frank asked, snapping his fingers in front of my eyes.

"Sorry. I had a flashback moment. Mikey, I wanted to tell you, but I was scared of what you would think. After what happened last time..." I confessed, my voice trailing off.

"I don't know how many times I've apologized for that Gerard. Why won't you ever forgive me?"

"Because it hurt! It hurt so bad! The thought of my own brother calling me by such names was like a dagger to my heart."

"I'm sorry Gerard. I really am."

"I know. I just don't know how fast I'm going to get over this." I said just before Frank's stomach began to rumble. We all laughed and Frank clutched his stomach. Just then there was another knock on the door.

"Well, hopefully this time it really is the pizza." Frank said before getting up and going to the door himself this time.