I Have Loved, and I Have Lost

I switched my straighteners off and slipped on a pair of flats. I couldn't be bothered to dress up for this 'party', so I'd stuck with a pair of skinnies, a tank top and the coat I'd bought after realizing just how cold it was in Sheffield.

“Silver, Oli's at th' door for yeh!” Lily called. I walked out of my room and said goodbye to Lily before leaving and getting into Oli's car. There were two other guys and a small brunette in the back of the car. I sat awkwardly in the front seat as Oli put the keys in the ignition and sped off down the road. I really don't know how the hell he passed his driving test – it was beyond me.

“S, this is Matt Nicholls, Lee and Matt's girlfriend – Kim.” Oli informed me as he turned the corner. I smiled at the three of them and they all grinned back as we muttered 'hello's' to each other. I'd met Lee and Matt N briefly before at school but never really spoken to them. They seemed nice enough though. We arrived at the party and entered the busy house.

“Hey, 's Silver, right?” A tall guy asked me. I nodded, recognizing his face from school and he was the guy that worked in the store with Oli.

“'m Curtis.” He smiled, slurring his name out slightly.

“Hey.” I laughed softly. I already knew his name but I let him tell me it anyway.

“Sorry, 'm not tha' drunk.” He laughed, straightening up.

“Hey Curtis!” A guy around Curtis' height yelled, slapping a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey Mike.” Curtis grinned.

“What's yeh name love?” 'Mike' asked me.

“Silver.” I smiled falsely at him. He looked a lot like Chace and thinking about Chace made me want to cry.

We'd been at the party for three or four hours now and Mike hadn't once left my side – which was starting to creep me out. He was funny though, especially now that we were both wasted. Mike leaned down to my level, not breaking eye contact. We weren't the only two in the kitchen; Oli, Curtis, Matt N, Matt K, Lee, Jake and Tom were also in here. Although, that didn't seem to bother Mike in the slightest. He moved closer to me, his hot breath tickling my lips. I was still babbling on about how I got the scar on my stomach from falling off of my bike when I was little, oblivious to the fact that Mike was in fact making a move on me. He pressed his lips to mine suddenly, his warm lips moving roughly against my own. I froze for a few seconds before putting my hands on his chest and pushing him away harshly. I hopped down off the stool and walked over to Oli and the others with my arms folded tightly across my chest, mumbling about how Mike was an inconsiderate dickfuck.

“Everythin' alrigh' love?” Curtis asked, looking down at me with a concerned expression on his face. He seemed to have sobered up a lot since I'd last spoken to him. I nodded in reply to his question but he was still giving me the same concerned look.

“Ol are you ready to leave?” I hiccuped. He nodded firmly, his jaw clenched and his fists balling at his sides. If I wasn't so drunk I would have asked him what was wrong, but I was this drunk so I kept quiet.

“Here, go an' get in th' car. 'm jus' gonna say bye t' everyone.” Oli told me, handing me his keys. I quickly hugged the others before making my way out to Oli's car, climbing into the passenger seat.

I waited a good ten minutes before getting out of the car and going back into the house to find Oli. Instead I bumped into Matt N who now had his arm around Kim.

“Matt, where's Oli?” I asked.

“Outside with Curtis and Tom.” He informed me, pointing towards the two sliding glass doors.

I stepped outside and heard voices. I saw Oli leaning against a wall with his eyes closed and his hands still balled up into fists at his sides as he breathed deeply. Curtis and Tom were talking to him but shut up when I came over.

“Oli, did you wanna stay or something?” I asked. “I can get Lily to come pick me up if you want.”

“Nah, 's fine Silver. C'mon I'll get yeh 'ome.” He said, his voice calm.

&&

I came out of Oli's bathroom and put my clothes in a pile on the floor. Oli had let me shower to sober up and lent me some basketball shorts and one of his t-shirts. I took my hair out of the messy bun I'd shoved it up in so it wouldn't get wet, and crawled into bed next to Oli.

“S, your phone rang whilst yeh was in th' shower.” Oli stated as he took his earphones out. I picked up my cell off of his bedside table and looked at who the caller had been.

Chace

I sighed and bit my lip, staring at the phone as if it would tell me why he'd rang.

“It was Chace.” I mumbled quietly.

“Yeh gonna ring 'im back?”

“I don't know. I wanna know what he wanted though.” I sighed, biting my lip.

“Text 'im then.” Oli suggested, putting his iPod on his other bedside table. I nodded and began to text Chace.

Hey sorry I missed your call – was in the shower. What did you want? x

I waited anxiously for a reply. I jumped when my ring tone filled the room.

“Hello?” I answered warily.

“Hey, I needed to talk to you but I couldn't say this through text.” Chace's voice filled my ears and made me relax.

“Say what?” I breathed.

I heard him take a deep breath before replying. “That I made a mistake. I love you and we can make this work.” My mouth fell open and I looked over at Oliver who was staring back at me curiously.

“I-I-I.. are you serious?”

“Yes, why wouldn't I be?”

“What made you change your mind?” I questioned.

“I love you, I miss you and I can't live without you. Even if it does mean that we're miles apart, at least you'll still be mine. I never want that to change, S.”

“S-So what does this mean?”

“Well, if you want to be, that you're my girlfriend again. Do you still want to be my girlfriend?” I nodded, a tear sliding down my cheek.

“Of course.” I replied quickly once I realized he couldn't see me nodding.

“Awesome. Will you come here for Christmas? You can stay with me, like we planned.”

“Yeah, that sounds great.” I smiled before yawning.

“Cool. I'll let you get to sleep, you sound tired. I love you so much Silver.”

“I-I love you too.” I replied before hanging up.

I looked over to Oli who was staring at the ceiling.

“You an' Chace back t'gether now?” He asked in a monotone, not removing his gaze from the ceiling.

“Yeah.” I grinned, sliding into bed.

“Awesome. Night Silver.” He snapped, rolling over and turning off his bedside lamp. What the hell was wrong with him!?