I Have Loved, and I Have Lost

“So, 'e didn't even make a move on yeh?” Kitty asked, shocked as we sat in Starbucks. She was questioning me about the night I stayed round Oliver's and babysat the twins.

“Well, we kissed.. but it didn't mean anything.” I said quickly. I watched as Kitty's eyes bulged out. She put her face in her hands, shaking her head.

“S, 'e's gonna end up breakin' your 'eart.” She mumbled. “Lemme guess, 'e's actin' all sweet and caring?” I nodded slowly.

“I don't think it's an act, K. I really don't.” I said honestly.

“Tha's what 'e wants yeh t' think! Why can't yeh see it!?” She groaned.

“It's not like I like him anyway Kitty. We're just friends.” I told her seriously.

“Mhm, tha's 'ow it always starts out. Jus'.. be careful with Oli. 'e always breaks 'earts.” She said sternly.

I nodded and took a sip of my latte, thinking about Oli.

“'Ello girls.” A deep voice boomed from above us. We both looked up to see Curtis towering over us.

“Hey Curtis.” We both smiled up at him. He pulled a chair over from a nearby table and sat on it.

“Shit, I gotta go. S, I'll ring yeh later.” Kitty said quickly after checking the time on her phone. I nodded silently and she grabbed her bags and left.

“So..” I murmured quietly. Curtis chuckled.

“'ow's you an' Oli?” He asked curiously.

“What do you mean 'me and Oli'? There isn't a me and Oli.” I stated firmly. Curtis held his hands up in the air in mock surrender.

“Jus' askin' 'cause th' two of yeh are close. Tha's all. Why are yeh so defensive?” I shrugged, not really knowing the answer.

“D'yeh like 'im or somethin'?” I shook my head vigorously.

“Are yeh sure?” Curtis pressed.

“Curtis, I'm positive. I love Chace, we got back together last night.” I informed him, sipping my drink. He groaned.

“'e lives miles away! It won' work.” He practically yelled.

“Yes it will, we'll make it work. Anyway, even if I was single and into Oliver, tons of people have warned me to stay away from him. And from what I've heard he doesn't exactly have a great reputation.”

“So, who's been warnin' yeh 'bout Oliver? Let me guess, Kitty told yeh wha' 'appened.” I nodded in response.

“Oli may get 'round but I aint ever seen 'im like this wi' a girl before. 'e was ready to kill Mike las' nigh' jus' for makin' a move on yeh.” Curtis told me.

“Why?” I asked, furrowing my brow.

“'Cause 'e likes yeh.. a lot.” He sighed, linking his hands behind his head.

“H-He.. likes me?” Curtis just nodded in reply. “B-But I'm with Chace.”

“Yeah an' Oli respects tha'. Tha's why 'e's tryna stay away from yeh.. so 'e can try an' forget 'bout 'is feelin's for yeh.” My mouth fell open.

“He's gonna avoid me because I'm back with my boyfriend!?” Curtis nodded again.

“'e don' wanna ruin your relationship with Chace. 'e knows 'ow much yeh love 'im.” I groaned and pinched the bridge of my nose as I closed my eyes.

“I need to get this sorted.” I told Curtis, jumping up. He protested but I ignored him and ran out of Starbucks, heading straight for Oliver's house. I was beginning to learn my way around here so it wasn't too hard to get there.

“Carol is Oli here?” I asked when his mom answered the door.

“Yeah, 'e's in 'is room.” She smiled, opening the door wider so I could go inside.

I raced down the stairs into Oli's room to see him sprawled out across his bed. His eyes were shut and his earphones were shoved into his ears, I could hear his music so it was obvious he had it as loud as it would go. His chest was bare, as were his legs. The only item of clothing he was wearing was a pair of boxers that clung to his scrawny legs. His hair was in soft waves and it was clear he'd let it dry naturally and not straightened it. I noticed I was smiling to myself as I took in his features so I shook it off and walked over to his bed, shaking him softly. His eyes snapped open and he jumped, ripping the earphones out of his ears.

“Silver, yeh scared th' livin' shit out o' me!” He screeched.

“Sorry. We need to talk.” I stated, getting straight to the point. He sat up, a worried expression creeping onto his face.

“Wha' 'bout?” He asked warily.

“Me and you. Is it true you're planning to avoid me simply 'cause I'm back with Chace?” He stared at me blankly for a few seconds before sighing and scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

“I-I wasn' gonna avoid yeh.” He whispered.

“Curtis seems to think you were.” I snapped, getting angry for a reason I didn't quite know. Oliver sighed dramatically and flicked his fringe out of his eyes.

“Look Silver, I like yeh alrigh'? I knew yeh was back wi' Chace an' I backed off. I aint gonna split th' two o' yeh up.” He stated. I looked at him weirdly. Hearing him admit that he liked me made me believe it. His eyes were filled with honesty and there was something about him that made me trust him.

“T-That doesn't mean you have to avoid me, Oliver.” He groaned in response.

“But if I'm always around yeh, I'll end up likin' yeh more an' more.” I didn't know how to respond to that, I just looked stared at him and tried to figure him out. One minute he's being an ass hole and the next he likes me.

“I should go.” I mumbled, walking towards the stairs.

“S, yeh don' 'ave t' go.”

“But you're avoiding me, remember?” I spat.

“I told yeh why, S.” He sighed deeply and closed his eyes. “Look, will yeh come t' the twins birthday party on Saturday wi' me?” He asked, opening his eyes.

“Are you sure you don't want to avoid me a little longer?” I teased.

“Jus' answer will yeh. Th' twins want yeh there, an' so do I.” I nodded slowly.

“Sure. I'll see you on Saturday.” I smiled, climbing his stairs and leaving him in his bedroom.