Blood Soaked Black Rose

I HAVE POSTED ANOTHER CH. BEFORE THIS SO BE SURE YOU DON'T MISS BABY...
Zakky’s POV
I was so happy when the test said positive. Eddie and I were going to have a baby! We’d been trying and Eddie even figured out where to go and it wasn’t an accident. Sure it wasn’t as fun as our usual anal, but hey. I ran out to the living room and hugged Eddie.
“What?” He asked looking up from his book that he was studying from. Kyler was in the kitchen talking to J.D. on the phone. I heard him talking about how much he hated that he would never ever be able to be a dad like he always wanted.
“We’re gonna be parents!”
“What? It…It actually worked?”
“Yeah. Isn’t it great!”
“No. No. I thought…I thought it would just get you to shut up about wanting a baby. Damn…”
“What?” He pushed me away from him.
“Get the hell out! You’re a freak! Guys aren’t supposed to have kids! It’s unnatural! I don’t want to be married to a fucking hermaphrodite! I fucking hate you! Get out! Get the fuck out of fucking here now!”
“Eddie…”
“No!” He went to our room and I followed him crying. “I hate you! I hate you! You’re disgusting! Get out and take your shit with you! All your fucking gay shit! Now!” He stuffed everything in a bag and threw it at me.
“We’re married.” I whispered.
“Not anymore!” He threw the ring at me along with a picture frame with us kissing at the wedding and our wedding certificate. “Get out and stop fucking up my life! I never want to see you ever again nor do I want to ever see that baby. Don’t expect me to pay. You have to do it alone! No, I hope you die from complications!”
“What about going to your parents house today?” He froze.
"We go and tell them that I’m divorcing your fucked up ass.” I let the words cut through me. I heard the front door slam. I knew that Kyler hated people yelling. I silently nodded while silently crying. We went to the car and drover to the Mathis’ house.
“Hey guys!” His mother hugged us both. “When are you going to make me a grandmother and bake me up a baby Zakkary?” She asked rubbing my stomach. Eddie had already gone to a different room.
“I already am.” I said.
“You’re pregnant?” I nodded.
“Oh, darling!” He hugged me and kissed my cheek. “Freddie, we’re going to be grandparents! Zakky’s prego!” I laughed softly at the excitement. She pulled me over to the couch. Freddie and Eddie were talking in the kitchen and Freddie looked really mad and kept pointing toward me. “These are Eddie’s baby pictures.” She smiled. She showed them to me. Then she got to a picture of Eddie and me at Eddie’s ninth birthday. I was kissing his cheek. Eddie was smiling and eating cake. Then there were more and more of him and me in middle school and high school being boyfriend like. Then some that were recent. I started crying.
“Aw, sweetums, it’s okay. You have a life time with him to have more happy memories.” That made me cry more. “What?”
“He kicked me out. He’s divorcing me. He said he never wants to see me again. He said that he doesn’t want the baby. He said he hopes I die.” I whispered collapsing in sobs. “He said that…that he could never love a hermaphrodite. He said he hates me. I love him so much.”
“Oh, baby.” She hugged me. “Here lay on the couch. I’m going to make it all better.” She disappeared in the kitchen. “Eden Samuel Mathis-Carson, you get your ass in there and you be a man! You will not leave him just because of what he is! You will not abandon your child! No go!”
“He’s a fucking whore mom. He’s a fag, a queer.”
“Look who’s talking.” Ouch. I thought. “You’re a fag, a queer, a cunt, a cocksucker, and more. Don’t you dare be a deadbeat jerk!” I went to the kitchen.
“Stop yelling at him and stop calling him those things!” I said and hugged him since he was crying softly. He pushed me away.
“Get out.” He said. “NOW!” I stared at him and left. I walked to Liam and Will’s house with my stuff. I got there and Kyler was sitting in front of it.
“I’m sorry.” He said hugging me.
“It’s not your fault. Guess what?”
“What?”
“We should have a Hello Kitty slumber party!”
“Uh…”
“Call everyone one! J.D. and Addie and Ashlie and Jena and Rachel! Oh, this will be so much fun!” I ran inside leaving Kyler confused on the front porch.

Nine Months Later:
Kyler’s POV
Zakky sat on the couch staring at the television that was playing a Hello Kitty DVD. He was nibbling on some cheese nips. I sat on the floor by the couch and looked at him. He didn’t really talk anymore. He just sat on the couch and ate or was in his room studying or sleeping. He’d go out with Ashlie and Jena, but didn’t stay out long. I decided to watch it.
“Kyler?” I looked at him.
“What?”
“Am I fat?”
“No, you’re pregnant.” He sighed throwing the rest of the cheese nips on the coffee table. He sat up.
“I miss Eddie.”
“I know.”
“Good thing is that he hasn’t filed for divorce. His mom calls a lot and asks how me and the baby are doing. I’ve decided not to find out if it’s a girl or a boy yet. I want it to be a surprise.”
“That sounds like a good idea.” I smiled. He patted the cushion next to him. Summer was annoying and I didn’t want to be out in the sun. I hated the sun. It gave you skin cancer and made you age bad. Sure, I used to swim at Eddie’s house occasionally when I was younger, but that was before I found out what the sun can do to your skin.
“You’re gonna be a sophomore this year.”
“Yeah.”
“I’m glad.”
“Oh…”
“Yeah. I want to see you graduate. You’re what's getting me through this. Yeah, Will and Liam are great, but you are what makes me keep going.” I smiled and hugged him.
“I’m here for you and you’re there for me. That’s what brother’s do.”
“I’m glad you’re my brother.”
“Me too.” The phone rang and Zakky picked up his cell from the coffee table.

Zakky’s POV
It was Eddie’s mother. I went to my room. “Hey Kali.” I laid on the bed.
“Hey sweetie. How are you and the baby?”
“We’re good, but someone needs to learn not to kick. It’s mean.” I said causing her to laugh. The baby was kicking now. I rested my hand on my stomach and closed my eyes. I felt it move and tensed. It wasn’t comfortable at all, kinda hurt.
“So, um, I was wondering if you wanted to come over and talk to me and Freddie. We miss you.”
“Uh…sure.”
“Honey, I know you haven’t seen Eddie in awhile, but we’re trying to get him man up and take responsibility for getting you pregnant.”
“It’s fine Kali. I…I love him still.”
“Good. See you in thirty minutes?”
“Yeah. Bye.” I pulled on my shoes and grabbed my keys. I went to their house and Eddie answered the door.
“What do you want?”
“Your mom wants to see me.” I said quietly.
“You’re really huge.” He said. I wanted to cry.
“Yeah Eden, with your motherfucking kid! Why? Why do I even try to be nice to you? What makes me think that you’re going to come back? Fine, if you want to raise our kid telling them that mommy was in a car crash and died, fine. I know it’d save a lot of pain because you don’t have to take care of it and they won’t feel like they are freaks that shouldn’t exist because nobody will know that a guy had them!” I pushed him out of my way and went into the house.
“Zakky…”
“No, if twelve years of friendship and love isn’t enough for you, then I don’t need you.” I went to look for his parents. I found them in the kitchen.
“Hey baby.” Kali kissed my cheek and patted my stomach.
“Hey Kal.”
“So you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Nervous, scared, but…fine”
“That’s good.” She gave me some clothes for the baby, some diapers and formula, blankets, pacifiers and toys. Then they took me to a room where there was a crib.
“Oh my God!” I said and hugged them. “You guys are so amazing!”
“Just make our grandbaby happy.” Kali kissed my cheek.
“I’m actually getting an apartment.” I said pushing my hair back.
“Oh. How’s Kyler?”
“He’s okay.”
“That’s good. Tell him we said hey.”
"M’kay.” Freddie took the stuff to my car while Kali said bye to me.
“Call us when you have the baby.”
“I will.”
“And Zakkary, we’re still trying to get Eddie to be nice.”
“Thanks.” I smiled and hugged her, leaving.

Kyler’s POV
I was at Addie’s house playing with Emily. Addie watched smiling. “She’s so cute.” I said tickling her. She could only say ‘no’ and ‘mommy’ at the moment. It was adorable. I held her in my lap as she fell asleep.
“Yeah. She can be a handful though.” Addie sat down. I looked down sadly at Emily. “What’s wrong?”
“Well…I’ll never be able to be a dad. Ever. What girl wants to be with an insane guy? And if I stay with J.D. for the rest of my life, there’s no way we could adopt. I guess I just have to accept it.” Addie bit her lip.
“No you don’t.”
“What?”
“Kyler, I’ve been lying to you. It’s not Sean’s baby. I have only done that with you. Emily’s your daughter. I just didn’t want to add to your problems and you had just come out of the hospital and I didn’t know how stable it’d be if she grew up knowing you were her father. You’ve tried to kill yourself. I just didn’t want her to grow up without a father. Sean’s stable you know?”
“What? I’m confused.”
“Emily’s your baby. You already are a dad.” I blinked and looked at my baby, a warm feeling spreading over me. That same weird feeling that I kept getting. Happiness? Yeah. “And she already calls you dada because Sean’s not here much and neither is J.D. It won’t be a big change for her.”
“Thanks for telling me Addie.” I smiled and hugged her. Emily whimpered in her sleep and I hugged her to me. My phone rang and I answered it.
“Hello?”
“Kyler? It’s Linda Chad, Zakky’s obstetrician.”
“Hi.” I said playing with Emily’s hair. It was really soft.
“Yes. Zakky wanted me to call you to tell you that he’s had a beautiful little girl.”
“What?”
“After twelve hours, you’re an uncle sweetie.”
“Okay. I’ll be right there kay? Tell him.”
“I will, bye.” I hung up and handed Emily to Addie kissing Emily’s cheek.
“What?” Addie said as I hugged her.
“I have to go. Zakky had the baby.”
“Aw…send him love.”
“I will.”
“Wait, do you need a ride?”
“I’ll just skate.” I smiled. I hated that all my friends had licenses, but I couldn’t. It sucked. I hated the laws. I grabbed my skateboard and found myself at the hospital.
“Welcome to Sacred Place Hospital, how may I help you?” A nurse asked me smiling.
“I’m looking for Zakky Carson’s room.”
“Oh, it’s 230.”
“Thank you.” I went to elevator and rode to the second floor before finding Zakky’s room. When I entered. I saw Zakky sitting on the bed smiling watching as Eddie’s parents cooed over my niece. Zakky saw me and held his arms out to me. I went over and hugged him.
“I want Eddie.” He whispered in my ear.
“I know.” I said brushing a tear off his cheek. “How are you doing?”
“Uh…okay I guess.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah…I-I went natural you know.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I heard that was the best. I was looking stuff up on the internet.” I nodded. “But it hurts like Hello Kitty.” I laughed. He was so random and funny. “I named her Krystal, but I think I’m gonna call her Kryssi, at least while she’s little.”
“That’s cute. She’s so tiny.”
“Yeah, but you were a lot smaller than her. I still can’t believe she came out of me…That me and Eddie made her…It’s amazing.”
“Zakky?” He looked up at Eddie’s mom who was handing Kryssi back.
“Thanks.”
“She’s beautiful sweetie. Looks so much like you. Thanks for giving us such a beautiful granddaughter and being a great son in law. I don’t think Eddie’s going to go through with what he said.”
“I hope he doesn’t.” Zakky said and kissed Kryssi. “I want him to see his daughter now though. You wanna hold her Kyler?” I nodded and took her gently.
“Zakkary, don’t get your hopes up okay.”
“Yeah, whatever. I thought he would come when I called him about being in labor. He said he’d try if he wasn’t doing anything, then he said that he was watching a movie so no.” Zakky pulled his knees up to his chest and sobbed into his arms.
I looked away and at Kryssi instead. She looked at me with huge blue eyes the color of sapphires. Her hands were so tiny. She was so tiny! I wondered how little I was when I was born. Eddie’s parents left a few hours later. I sat on the edge of the bed as Zakky held Kryssi randomly talking to her. Telling her that she was beautiful and he loved her more than anything, even me. I smiled at this. He looked up at me.
“Ky, how is it possible to love this much?”
“She’s your baby.”
“Yeah…”
“Oh, you know Emily?”
“Addie’s daughter? Yeah.”
“She’s mine.” I smiled.
“I know.”
“What? How?”
"J.D. told me…And Addie.”
“Oh…”
“But don’t be mad that I didn’t tell you.”
“I’m not. I just…”
“What? I didn’t think it was appropriate. You’re sixteen and have a lot of problems.”
“She makes everything better.” I said quietly.
“Really?”
“Yeah, even before when she was just my goddaughter. I loved her and it hasn’t changed.” I smiled and rubbed her hand with my thumb. “How small was I?”
“Well…you were a foot long, um…like two pounds. They put you in this incubator. So I guess Janie started abusing you before you were even born.”
“Punishing.” I corrected him automatically.
“What did you ever do? Exist? That’s not your fault.”
“Um…I’m gonna go. I’ll come back tomorrow okay?”
“Yeah. Sure.” I hugged him and left.

Zakky’s POV
It was two the next day and I was waiting for Tera to come with Kyler and his friends. I wanted them to bring Kryssi’s cousins so she could meet them, but I knew that they couldn’t. I wondered where Addie and Kyler would leave Emily since both her parents were at school and then coming. I sighed and was reading when I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up and saw Eddie in the doorway.
“Eddie, hey.” I smiled. He didn’t return the smile.
“My parents are forcing me to do this. Where’s the brat.”
“What? Brat? Uh, Kryssi is in the nursery. What’s your problem?”
“My problem is you’re a freak. I don’t want to be married to a freak or be around a baby that shouldn’t exist because her biological parents are gay guys. Guys. Gay. Not anything else. You ruin my life with that bitch.”
“Stop calling her a bitch and a brat. She is only two days old. What did she ever do to you?”
“Exist.”
”Oh fuck you.”
“No.”
“No, see that’s your problem, you don’t. You need some. Honey, she’s in the nursery. We can now.” I smiled at him. “I can…I can fuck you…be on top.” Eddie chewed on his lip then nodded closing the door.
“But I’m on top fucker.” He giggled and jumped on me kissing me. “You wearing anything but this hospital gown? Underwear perhaps?”
“Nope.” I smiled.
“Good. Let’s just do this.”
“Hey, Eddie, it’s been almost a year, so be gentle.”
“Fuck that. I’m mad at you.”
“Please?”
“No. I want you to know what I felt. I want you to get why I don’t ever let you be on top.” I was scared by the crazed look in his eyes.
“Eddie…”
“Shut up.” He kissed me roughly and then ripped off the hospital gown. “I’m horny. I hate that I’ve spent the last nine months jacking off. I need you.” He slammed into me roughly and I cried out in pain. “Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.” He said running his fingers through my hair. He wasn’t gentle. He didn’t stop when I asked him. I was begging him to stop for ten minutes before he did. My cheeks were stained with tears.
“What the hell?” I whispered as he tied the hospital gown on me. I saw the white hospital sheets slowly turn red with blood that was coming steadily now. He pulled his clothes on.
“This was to show you what my first time was like. Being raped feels like.” Then he left. Did he rape me? Is that? No…I…I asked him to fuck me, but then I asked him to be gentle and to stop didn’t I? No, Eddie didn’t rape me in a hospital. He didn’t…did he?
“The minute you say no or stop and they don’t, it become rape.” My mother’s voice came into my head along with every person that ever gave me the sex/rape/sexual abuse lecture. I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror I was shaky and sobbing. I went back to the bed and sobbed until someone came in. I saw it was Dr. Chad.
“Are you okay Zakky?”
“Uh…yeah…can I get a shower or something? Please?”
“No. Not right now. We need to make sure there wasn’t complications.” I nodded. She pulled back the sheets and gasped.
"Why there so much blood?”
“I…I…um…”
“There shouldn’t be that much…not after…”
“Eddie…Eddie came and we…we yeah, but I haven’t been with him that way for a year.”
“Oh…um…okay.” I nodded relieved that she hadn't questioned me farther. She took me to an examination room and they made sure I was okay.

A Month Later…
Zakky’s POV
I was awoken by Kryssi screaming. I wanted to cry. I was so tired. Between school and Kryssi, I could only sleep for an hour a day. I couldn’t do this much longer. Coffee wasn’t helping anymore. I picked her up.
“Krys, sweetie, what’s wrong?” She calmed down as I held her. I checked her diaper, which was clean then warmed a bottle of formula. I checked the temperature and decided it was okay. I fed her the bottle then burped her. She fell asleep making adorable noises. I went to put her in the crib and she woke up crying again.
“Kryssi, what do you want from Daddy? I…I’m sleepy.” I said through tears. I picked her up and she stopped and fell back to sleep. I tried her crib again and she’d whimper. I looked at my bed. “You want me with you don’t you? You don’t like being alone in your crib that Grandma and Grandpa got for you, do you?” I laid down on my bed and let her lay on my chest. I fell asleep and wasn’t awakened for the rest of the night. I woke up the next day at eleven and she was still sleeping soundly. I put her in her crib and she opened her eyes and cooed at me.
“Hey sweetie.” I smiled. She was so precious. I still missed Eddie despite what happened a month ago. I loved him. I loved our daughter. She had my straight hair, but a medium brown. I guess that it was the mix between Eddie’s blonde and my almost black hair. She was wearing a Hello Kitty one piece. She looked adorable. I picked her up and went to the kitchen to get something to eat. “Are you hungry?” I asked.
“Bloo ga maow.” I smiled and heated up the formula so it was just barely warm and fed her she didn’t want any, so I put the cap back on and put in the fridge. I checked the diaper which needed to be changed. After she was taken care of I laid her on a blanket on the floor and made a cup of coffee. I sipped it watching her play with the rattles. Someone rang the doorbell and she looked at me with wide eyes. “Oo?” I smiled and went to answer the door. She whimpered and I went back picking her up. I opened the door and saw Ashlie.
“Hey Ash.” I smiled.
“Aw, Zakky, she’s the most adorable little thing ever. Damn Eddie.”
“Don’t cuss in front of her please. I don’t want her to. You know…I really don’t.”
“No, just when you’re talking to random people. So I was wondering if you wanted to go do something today?”
“Uh, no thanks.”
“Oh, well bye.” She kissed my cheek and left.
“Blah buh!” Kryssi screamed bouncing up and down. I closed the door and went back to the kitchen. I laid her back down and finished my coffee. “Dada?” Kryssi said reaching her hand to me. Aw. I didn’t want to let my coffee get cold, but I didn’t want to her to cry. I sighed and picked her up. She played with my necklaces. She showed them to me one at a time.
“Yeah!” I said when she picked up the locket that Eddie gave me for our three year anniversary in high school. It held a picture of Eddie and one of both of us at prom. We were crashing. I laughed to myself thinking about when we got found out and had detention for a month. My parents were not happy. I didn’t mind. It meant I got to spend an hour with my boyfriend in a room that the teacher didn’t even stay in. We did it a lot during that time.
I was always confused growing up. Beyond whether I liked girls or guys or boy. I was always confused about who I was. Eddie didn’t make me confused. He made me feel wanted, loved. He loved me. He didn’t care about anything else. When I got pregnant, he made me go back to my confused junior high and high school years. Things didn’t seem right then and especially when I was the only guy that had a period on the swim team. The coach didn’t care. Didn’t ask questions. He just made file papers in his office. I didn’t like it. It hurt to know that the one person who I wasn’t related to who knew and didn’t care hated me…raped me.
“Baba!” Kryssi cried breaking me from my thoughts. I got her formula.
“Two words today Kryssi. You’re on a roll!”

I POSTED 2 CH. TODAY. BABY...WAS BEFORE THIS SO PLEASE BE SURE TO READ IT.
I KNOW THIS WENT FAST, BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO DRAG IT OUT. THE NEXT CH WILL BE HAPPY...COMMENTS?