Find Some Peace

“Oh-ho-ho shiiiiiit,” I laughed, staring at the computer screen over Sidney’s shoulder and tossed my head back to let a roar of laughter rip from my throat. There were pictures of us around town posted in some tabloid paper so I was now sure that we’d have to be all the more careful about where we chose to go and when. “Looks like we’ll have to go get ice cream at like midnight from now on,” I snorted, seating myself on the ground.

“Yeah, I guess so.” The brunette ran a hand through his hair, a vacancy in his eyes surfacing I had yet to witness. His expression softened and finally tuned into a stern stare at the picture on the screen of he and I smiling, entering a little down town café. His irises seemed to swirl menacingly for a moment. The chocolate brown seemed to etch itself with gold, but only for mere seconds as he studied the image and the headline and the questions regarding his relationship status and my identity.

The second it finally got in my head, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. “You get stuff like this a lot, don’t you?” I whispered and stared at the ground.

It took him a second to respond, his back still to me. “Not as much as the normal celebrities, but yeah.”

“Rant.”

“Hm?” He turned in the rotating chair and raised an eyebrow.

I smiled reassuringly back up at him. “Rant to me. Come on; it has to drive you a little crazy Mr. King of the Hockey World.”

He frowned. “It drives me insane, actually. I love my sport, really, I do. It’s my life and my passion, but shit like this always makes me rethink things. I hate not being able to just go hang out with my friends like a normal guy while I’m at home. I hate not being able to have a relationship without everyone attacking me about her if she has half a flaw. I’m sick and tired of the same, boring interviews covering the same stuff, and most of all, I hate not being able to sit down and have lunch with a friend without having pictures accusing us of being ‘an item’ in a bunch of tabloids the next day…

“And being told what to do by my agent every five seconds; how to act, what to say, how to say it… I know it sounds dumb, but sometimes I’m not even sure if I’m myself or just the kid I’m supposed to be in the eyes of the general public. I just wish sometimes that I wasn’t Sidney Crosby: Captain of the Penguins… Sometimes I wish I could just be Sidney, the regular college-age kid from Nova Scotia who likes video games, wearing plain t-shirts, and cake.”

I never really thought about it… He’s stuck in a prison of who he’s supposed to be rather than who he wants to be all so he can live out his dream… And all the while he’s dealt with so much… Not being able to blink without speculation, the usual things that come up with having a family, Casey, having to stay here and choosing to deal with my shit and yet… “How do you smile?” I whispered, folding my arms over my knees and planting my face in my arms. …He’s still one of the happiest people I know.

“Huh?”

“How can you smile so much when… Well, everything that’s happened to you…”

He blinked his gentle eyes a few times. Sidney hardly moved otherwise. “I know that in order to do the things I do and live the big upside of this lifestyle, I have to deal with stuff like that. Other road blocks happen. That’s life. I guess that… I don’t know… Frowning all the time just isn’t worth it.”

He’s so strong…

“It’s easier said than done, though,” he added quickly and sent me one of those glances that let me know he was reading my mind.

“Yeah,” I whispered, “Easier said than done.”



Woah wo-woah!
Why do I put myself in these situations?
Woah wo-woah!
I keep pushin’ myself even though I can’t take it at all!

My ring tone sent my entire body flying into the kitchen, where I had last left my cell. I fumbled and nearly dropped the thing at least five times, to Sidney’s amusement, before finally answering. “This is Amanda! … Mhm. Yeah… I guess-Of course! Oh yeah, I’d be more than happy to! When? O-Alright! I’ll be there in an hour. Thank you so much, Ralph!”

Click.

“What was all that about?” Sidney asked as I darted passed him. He followed me as I flew up the stairs and straight into my closet.

“Hold this,” I commanded, throwing a pair of Mek jeans at him. He stopped them with his face. No big. “I get to go to some ridiculous meeting on the other side of town. Either way, I’m back in business. I’ll be home soon since this shouldn’t take long. Meanwhile I would really love if you could order us something for dinner? You can order a movie or whatever On Demand, I don’t really care. Do whatever you want!” At some points my voice was muffled thanks to pulling off my shirt. Naturally Sidney blushed madly and turned right around.

“Warning please?!”

“Why the hell are you looking?!” I mocked and teased, leaving the closet to snatch his jeans from his hand. Closing the door behind me this time, I stripped down and changed in maybe five seconds flat. “Alright,” I spoke, throwing my purse over my shoulder and slapping on a pair of cheap single-lens, goggle-like sunglasses. “I have my cell. Call me if the house burns down!”

“That’s what you’re wearing to a meeting?”

“It’s what he told me wear!” I cheered back, already out the door.

The brunette simply shook his head and turned his heel, ready for some lone relaxation.



I flipped channels for what felt like hours, but nothing good was on. As usual, I thought to myself, getting up to go explore further in Amanda’s office thing. It seemed like I was having the most fun in there when I wanted to pass time anyway. Hopefully she didn’t hate me for going through her photo album, but it was left out so in a way she was kind of asking for it. Well… She definitely wasn’t forbidding it.

Last night, man… I felt my cheeks heat a little bit thinking about it. Well yeah! I was embarrassed being walked on while I was basically invading a picture diary that she definitely didn’t enjoy seeing. Honestly I couldn’t believe she stayed together so strongly. Amanda really has grown on me. That girl is something different, that’s for sure. Then again…

And I sat there in slight wonder, tapping my fingers on the top of her desk just before the keyboard. “I wonder if she’ll ever stop crying when she thinks of him or when she sees his picture,” I spoke aloud, softly, and began fiddling with the closed photo album left last night at the edge of the desk. “You guys made an awesome couple,” I continued, and that’s when my heart wrenched.

“Just like Casey and I…”

Oh, not now, man. Mentally shouting at myself, I grabbed the silent house phone. “Dude! She’s rubbing off on me too much… my god… I need to distract myself.”

Bee-be-bee-be-be-bee-beep… Beeeeeep…… Beeeeep…… Beeee-“Hullo?”

“Hey, Tanger!”

“Siddo! What’s going on?” the man answered with an obvious smile on his face. “Oh wait! Okay! You’re on speaker. Max and Geno are over.”

“Haha Hey, guys.”

“Hi Sidney!”

“SIDDOOOO!!!!”

“… Hi, Max.”

“So,” Kris’s voice came up, finally, “What’s new with you and Amanda. You haven’t told me anything since you and her had that little breakthrough of yours. What’s up?”

I shifted slightly in my seat at the thought. By “breakthrough”, he meant when I told her about Casey… “Yeah well eh… She walked in on me looking through an old photo album last night and showed me a ton of the pictures of her and Matt way back in the day. She took it better than I expected, that’s for sure.”

“Dude, she didn’t cry?”

“No, she did, but not half as much as thought she would. Honestly I expected her to get emotional and bitchy at me for snooping. She seemed kind of… I dunno… Happy I was looking…”

“Sooo… What happened?”

“Nothing. She just put her head on my shoulder and cried a little. She relaxed way fast and fell asleep after a little bit.”

“Wait. You held her until she fell asleep?”

“Yeah...?”

All of them broke out into one big, long, obnoxious “AWWWWWWWWWWWWW” all at the same time.

I rolled my eyes and exasperated.

“But really, have you guys hooked up yet?”

“Shut the fuck up about that, Max! We’re not like that!” I snapped instantly, groaning and turning on the computer. “My god, is that all you guys think about?”

There was quiet on the other end for all of four seconds before all of them at once answered, “Yeah, pretty much.” A few seconds passed before the guys burst into fits of happy gibberish. “Trent just got here, sorry,” said Kris, who was fiddling with something I couldn’t identify.

“Hey Trent!” I shouted happily, opening up Google and logging onto my email. I clicked around messages briefly and deleted quite a bit of junk.

“Hey, Sid! How’s it going over there? She hasn’t killed you, I hear.”

Chuckling, I leaned back in the chair and closed my eyes. “Yeah, your sis is a piece of work,” I replied with a light tone as not to imply this in an insulting manner.

“Hopefully she hasn’t been too bitchy to you. Sorry if she has, man. Why aren’t you home?”

“Because fucking Clark is rained in so he can’t get here for another few days. I should be done and out of here by around next Friday-ish, though so you guys don’t have to fail at life since I’m gone much longer.”

“Ouch, thank you.”

“Well, you know that that was directed mostly at Max, but still…”

“Ahaha, I get it, man.”

My ears perked slightly at a sound from outside of the room. A low rumble could be heard signaling the garage door opening and closing. “You know what? I have to go so I’ll talk to you guys later, okay?”

“Yeah, totally.”

“Alright, later.”

“I’m back!” her voice rang down the hall. I swiftly closed and discarded the photo album back to its original spot, closed my email from her desktop, and put the phone back on its charger. “Dude, where the hell are you?” She sounds… Really happy? That’s more like it…

“What’s gotten into you?” I asked, leaning on the door frame. She danced into the kitchen, one iPod headphone in her ear while the other flailed about spastically with her twirling movements. The woman seemed to glide about, picking bowls and ingredients from every which way until she finally found incentive, via the stupid little spare headphone, to plug her music into the iHome in the corner of the counter top. Instantly Down filled the room, which was probably the most bubblegum thing on mainstream radio at the moment, which made me wonder. What the hell had gotten into this girl?

“I’m frigging hungry and I like cooking, so sue me!” Amanda replied in a sing-song voice and continued to do her oddly graceful yet quick dance about the kitchen. I moved further into the room now so I could watch her move about, bouncing her head around to the beat. It was actually kind of cute, the way she seemed so into the music yet mechanically found everything she needed for…

“What exactly are you making?”

“I was thinking,” she pulled a large bowl from the top shelf of a cabinet, “I’m going to make shrimp scampi, a nice fresh salad, and cake for desert. Oh! I love this song!” Turning the volume up, she buttered a pan and slapped on top of the preheating stove. Meanwhile she popped a measuring cup with a whole stick of butter in the microwave to melt and began cutting up a head of lettuce for the salad all of which was done perfectly to the beat of Whoa Oh! by Forever The Sickest Kids.

A grin spread across my unintentionally thinned lips at the sound of “cake”. It made me question for a moment if that was intentional or not, but from the way she sent a smile my way, I would say it was. “What put you in such an awesome mood?” I asked, moving into the kitchen and leaning against the farthest counter, near the entrance to it, so I would be out of her way.

“Ehhhhh,” she hesitated for a brief second, but the mischievous glint never left her eyes as she replied surprisingly nonchalantly, “Not much, really. I was just sort of… Thinking about stuff and this whole situation and you on the way home and I dunno. I just felt like doing this… Don’t judge me! Or kill my mojo, eh?” The microwave finally dinged, sending her back into a routine of flamboyant movement.

My smile couldn’t have grown larger. So she’s doing all of this for me? Wow, that’s… No one has ever done anything like this for me. And it’s not cooking dinner, I meant; it’s the fact that she added cake in there and made pasta, which I loved, and added shrimp, which I also loved, along with a small salad and, as I later noticed, she even bought my favorite kind of soda. She had taken all of my favorites and thrown them all together. It was like her way of thanking me, I guessed, which was sweet.

Four songs had passed, all of which were pretty long and had a really fast beat that got her moving and wiggling about the same happy way. Never once did she stop or mess up on something she was trying to make, even if all of the dishes were easy. I set the table while she finished off making the shrimp scampi, which, by the time we got it to the table, was irresistible scent-wise. We ate not five seconds later.

It was final.

Shrimp Scampi was my new favorite dish. Seriously, it was that good. And the best part was that it was way simple to make so anyone could do it. Even Max, if that gives you a clearer picture. Oh, that was rude…

Oh well, just being truthful.

The second we finished cleaning up our little mess, she gave me an odd look. It was one of those glances that meant she wanted to say something, but didn’t know how to put it. I simply half smiled back, which in turn, I swear to god, actually made her cheeks just a little more red than they already were. Really I couldn’t help but smile wider now.

Bahaha… I just made her blush. What the hell has gotten into her?

“Hey Sidney?” she finally asked, watching me with a blank expression.

“Yeah?”

Inhaling deeply, she chewed on her inner cheek and motioned for me to follow her. “Wait, wait wait… Close your eyes. I’ll guide you.”

I raised a brow at first, but she glared right back at me until I did as I was told. Jeeze, pushy, pu-Holy fuck, is she holding my hand? Wow, this is-what the-her hands are really sof-

“Open your eyes!”

“…” Good feelings gone.

“So… What do you think?”

“What the hell is that?”

“The newest Ducati concept protobike. They’re calling it the Pulse SXR1.”

“Proto… As in screaming metal death trap number one?”

“It’s gotten all of the necessary tests done, the paperwork is done, and now its mine.”

“What the hell? You did this today?”

She nodded smugly, that glint still not gone which lead me to believe she wasn’t finished with the surprises.

“This was your meeting? You bought a fucking prototype.”

“It was free, actually.”

“What?!”

“Relax kid.”

“Why should I relax?!”

“Because I got one for you too.”