Don't Blame Me for Being Me

Chapter 6
Now, if I ds it like this will you do it like that? Now, if I touch you like this will you touch me right back? Now, if I move like this will you move it like that?
After stupid quarrel we made an awesome peace which was fulled of lust and sex, tender and sweetness…. But only after four days. Yeah, we didn’t speak or see each other four days… I found out that we’re both proud and stubborn the same and there’s hard for us to make a step towards each other =(. As usual, I feel myself guilty when I have quarrel with him. With anybody. These little disagreements let us down so much. We’re tired of them but keep nagging at each other.
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In my view it’s strange but anyway it’s good. We have a peaceful week. It’s incredible xD. It’s what I deserved for the last time. It’s what we gave to each other. It’s what we enjoy now xD.
Anyway I love him.
Notwithstanding our quarrels.
Anyway I fall asleep with his arms around me.
Even when we don’t understand each other at many things.
Anyway I kiss him.
In spite of our hidden jealousy to everything we do.
Anyway I like to wake him at mornings.
Even when we’re acting selfish.
Anyway I’m for him.
It’s all the same ‘cause he’s mine xD...
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Brendon’s in Las Vegas now. I study. We call each other. We miss each other. Sincerely. It’s…all…sincerely now.
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It was evening. Dasha and me were lying on our beds drinking the rest of some portwine, which was happened to be in our house (such things are always happened to be in our house xD), and listening something from Marilyn Manson. Dasha likes him much, I don’t.
“How’s Ryan? I didn’t hear anything about him from you a long ago”, I asked Dasha.
“Fuck him. We don’t speak. He’s asshole”, she replied.
I laughed.
“Why?” I asked.
“Why he’s an asshole?” she asked and yawned.
“And that’s too”, I smiled. “you know him better than me”.
“It’s a pity. He bores me to stiff. And he’s asshole”.
“Why? Just explain”, I smiled again.
“He annoyed me by his silly chats about him and me, about our future (he’s completely idiot to think this will be extended this much). So according him I can’t look at other boys, be anywhere without him. As if the only thing I desire is to look at his mug!”
“He loves you very much, girl. Care to appreciate it at least. But you’re right, I don’t like too when boy says too much about himself and me”, I said getting up.
“Yeah, and if he thinks I love him back, he’s really jerk. Of course I like him, but still… he hopes of nothing”, she said and drank.
“It’s rough. And does he know about it?” I walked to a mirror.
“It’s his problem. I just don’t imagine we can have a serious relationship. I don’t consider it’s something serious”, she lay on her back and looked up.
“Let him know, Dash. It’ll be better, it’ll help you afterwards. Where’s the bottle?” I said after looking at myself in the mirror.
“It’s almost empty”, she replied thinking of something.
“Let me drink down then”, I asked.
She took the bottle under her bed and gave me. while I was pouring the drink into my glass I got a text message. I took my mobile and read “how’re u spend night? Dancing?” it was from Brendon. I laughed.
“Brendon thinks we’re having a party now”, I said to Dasha.
“Haha. So tell him it’s true”, she “adviced”.
“Sure”, I replied and dialed Brendon.
“Hi!” I heard Brendon’s voice.
“So you really think about me so or it was a joke? I’m in bed, my darling!” I said funny.
“It’s pleasant to hear this, you know. Some times before I’d called you just because and you were in some clubs. Today I ask straight and you think I joke. I like it, girl!”
We laughed.
“Okay, okay. I appreciate your wit, man. Where are you?” I asked and heard someone’s voice. There was somebody with Brendon.
“I’m hanging out”, he replied.
“Who’s helping you to speak with me and thinking I don’t hear it?”
“Oh, it’s Ry”, I got an answer.
“Why does he bother us. I wanna talk to you, not to him”, I complained.
“He asked about Dasha”, Brendon said.
“Dasha’s alright. What’s else?” I said wishing to end with this part.
“If it’s Ross, tell that I’m with two…no, four beautiful, tall and strong boys in club! And I have a mobile too! If he has something to say!” Dasha yelled with an enormously loud voice from her bed.
“She said…”, I was about to repeat Dasha’s words.
“Ry heard. All of us heard, thanks”, he laughed.
“Well. So you have a good time?” I asked Bren seeing Dasha was talking to somebody (probably, Ross) with a loud voice.
So I got up and walked out of the room.
“Yeah, awesome”, he smiled. I felt it.
“Bastard. When will you come back?” I asked ‘cause I wanted to see him so much.
“As soon as you want”, he said with pleasant voice xD.
“Right now?” I joked.
“Uhuh’, he smirked.
We laughed.
“About dancing, by the way. You know how much I wanna go out with you? So know. I want this badly”, I said.
“Just wait for some days. We’ll burn all dancefloors in LA!” he exclaimed.
I laughed.
“So what else news?” he asked.
“Oh, I feel like you just nestled up very comfy and wanna speak with me. Or just listen to my chattering”, I smirked.
“Fuck, you’re right”, he chuckled. “How was it so obvious?” he sighed.
“Well, news...I dunno. I was good at Finance today in the univer”, I said.
“Good job”, he pried.
“Thanks. Also I painted my nails blue. And my toes too. In the same color”, I giggled.
“Cool. It looks so?”
“Yeah, I think. And with my next words just feel how I miss you. I have nobody to cook for”, I said.
Brendon laughed.
“Oh why?” he asked.
“You know the way Dasha feed her body (it really can’t be called eating). Ryan’s with you. I cook not much for myself, so my kitchen and me miss you!” I explained.
“okay, okay. Miss you too, you know. I’ll come back to you soon. Just some days apart. It’s usual...for us”, he said.
“Well, return as soon as you can. I don’t force you to anything. I make some plans for us to the time you’ll be here. Hope you’ll like what I thought up”, I smiled.
“Oh, amazing”, he replied a little lazily.
“Are you drinking?” I asked.
He chuckled.
“Fuck, how you guess?” he laughed.
“You’re getting tired to listen to me. I feel it”, I smiled.
“Sorry, honey. I just really wanna be with guys now. Sorry!”
“As if I force you to speak with me”, I sounded a little bit frustrated.
“Oh, Ira, please, just forgive. But I’m really hanging out. You were too for some days ago. So I have a right”, he said.
“Really? You have this right?” I said in a fake bitchy tone.
He laughed.
“So I can go to the guys?”
“of course! Have fun and take care. Bye. I’m gonna sleep”, I said.
“Sweet dreams”, he wished me.
“Oh, and please invest some money on my mobile. My calls to you are rich for me. You know, I’m just a poor student”, I said ironically.
He laughed and promised to do that.
I closed my mobile with a content smile. Everything was fine. ‘Everything’ is our relationship, is our moods, our chats, our calls, our treatment to each other. Everything…
Dasha was still talking and I lay on my bed and had to fall asleep to awful songs of Manson xD.
**************After some days**************
Ryan attacked Dasha that to win her love again during two days and he won.
Bren came back and we walk and kiss, talk and have fun, joke and lie about on a floor in my house, eat candies and watch films with Gael Garcia Bernal. We started with Amores Perros, then Y Tu Mama Tambien, Motorcycle’s Diaries, Babel, Bad Education, The Science of Sleep and Blindness. This one impressed me much. Bernal’s character was so terrible, so cruel and disgusting...I’d like to kill him too.
Well, Brendon and me discussed all the movies and all the characters including Gael Garcia Bernal. We discussed Bernal’s features! xD We discussed his eyes, his body, how he acts, he talks with all details xD. We were about get across because of that but it’s alright. By the way, Bernal is my fav actor. He’s awesome. In each his role. xD
Brendon’s with me for two weeks! Have nothing to say else. Just he’s with me. And as we promised to each other we did go hang out one Saturday night together. Along with Dasha and Ryan.
“Oh my...you look amazing”, Brendon said when I came downstairs.
He and Ryan were waiting for Dasha and me apply everything we need to look stunning xD. Well, I first came to them in a lounge and stood in front of them waiting for boys’ opinion. I dressed elastic gold tights, black mini shorts, dark brown V-shaped top and black jacket.
“What do you think?” I asked the guys.
“I said. You’re amazing”, Brendon came up to kiss me.
“Yeah, I like it too”, Ryan said quietly.
“Dasha’s coming soon!” I pitied to his sad look.
Ryan nodded tiredly. Hell, he doesn’t like to wait xD. Brendon was looking me up and down.
“What is it? Heels? The height?” he bent down to check my shoes. I smiled looking at his figure knowing the answer – 3 fucking inches xD. Brendon stood up and looked at me.
“So how much exactly?” he asked.
“No matter. I won’t take them off! Don’t even ask and don’t look at me as if I’m 10 years old and this is my first time I wear heels”, I giggled.
“It’s MY first time to see you wearing heels”, he corrected me smiling. “So I kinda don’t know how it looks like”, he kinda joked xD.
I rolled my eyes.
“It looks totally normal”, I replied and kissed his nose tenderly while he pressed his lips to my chin as a reply. And I must say I like this our act xD.
Well, I began gathering my handbag throwing keys, wallet, compact, mascara, napkins, lighter, various lipsticks and many other there xD. Soon Dasha walked to us looking awesome in her black skinny jeans and long-sleeved printed t-shirt. Ryan exhaled deeply in sign of awe or may be of relief xD. So with joking chat we all left the house. I locked the exit door while Ryan pulled his car out to a driveway. Dasha and me established ourselves at backseats leaving boys at front. So Ryan engined his car once again and we began driving.
“I dunno why but I’m so excited as if I’m gonna to a nightclub for the first time”, I confessed.
“It’s because of me, I’m sure”, Brendon chuckled.
“I said that I dunno”, I replied.
“Me in opposite. I feel calmness of professional clubber”, Dasha smirked.
*********Soundtrack – 3OH!3 - I’m not your boyfriend, baby***********
After a short conversation with her I decided to pay attention to my boyfriend. I sat up straight in my seat and rumpled his hair slightly ‘cause I knew how much time he spent arranging it.
“Hey! It’s fucking styled!” he said pulling away from my hands.
“I know. I did nothing to your style”, I smirked.
He checked his reflection in a rear mirror and sat normally again. I began tapping his shoulders.
“We’re gonna rock it, we’ll rock it”, I was singing stupidly my new thought-up melody xD. “Oh, baby! If you wanna hit the floor are you ready for more! We’ll rock them all, we’ll burn them down!”
Guys were laughing along with me snickering.
“What will your first drink be there?” Brendon asked me.
“Tequila and nothing less!” I replied.
“How do you love it? It isn’t tasty or whatever”, Dasha said.
“It rocks!” I replied laughing.
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The clubbing was pretty hot xD. The scenario was pretty simple – drinks, Dasha and me dancing, drinks, cooling down, Dasha and me dancing, Brendon and Ryan looking at us with an interest and desire xD, Dasha and me pulling them to the dancefloor, dancing altogether, drinks, dancing in couples xD, drinks.
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“I love dancing with you”, Brendon said to me when we had a little break sipping our drinks.
I smiled.
“We’re hot”, I said as a reply.
He nodded.
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“I wanna I wanna touch youuuu! You wannaaa touch meeee toooo”, Dasha and me were singing on our unsteady way to a parking lot. “So put your hands on meeee!”
We sang and felt slaps on our humps xD. We turned around to see just our smiling boyfriends xD.
“You asked to do this”, they said.
We laughed and kept going to our car together.
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