You Don't Know A Thing About My Sins

-Mikey'sPOV-

I heard someone pounding the door. I got up, making sure not to wake the others, and ran quietly to the door. I opened it and there was a policeman standing there. He took off his hat and cleared his throat.

"Are you Michael Way?"

"Uh yeah, I am...why?"

"Well, we were sent a report of a car registered at this address that drove off the Brightman Bridge about two hours ago. The owner of the car is listed as Gerard Way...is he available?"

What was this? A car drove off a bridge? That can't be Gerard...he's too sane for that.

"No, he's...he's in the Newark Clinical Center for Troubled Minds."

"I see. Well, Mr. Way, we recovered the car, but there was no body...we recovered a shoe in the car itself...does this look familiar?" he asked, holding up a shoe that I could tell was Gerard's...even though I wanted it not to be.

"Yeah, that's his shoe."

"Then I'm afraid to say that we think that Gerard has drowned..."

There was no fucking way. Not him. Not my Gerard. Not my brother!

*****

Holy shit, what was that!?

Somebody get him, NOW!

Call the ambulance! He doesn't look too good!

Hey, isn't that that guy from My Chemical Romance?

Does it fucking matter? He's drowned! Get him help now!

"Mr. Way, can you hear me?"

"He's out cold, doctor! I think we were too late!"

"No! Not yet! Mr. Way, CAN YOU HEAR ME? SAY SOMETHING!"

A quick flash of light appeared in front of me....

"SHIT! HIS EYES OPENED! HURRY, GET HIM HELP!"

Was this Heaven? Why would they say these things in Heaven?

*****

I felt my eyes slowly lift, and there was a man standing next to me. He looked like a doctor.

"Welcome back, Gerard. You can thank those river-side residents for spotting you going in the water, how are you feeling?" he told me. Wait, was I saved!? No fucking way! I was supposed to die! Geez...now I gotta face more time in that asylum...so much for freedom.

"Gerard, what happened? Why did you go off the bridge?" he asked me with a worried look. I didn't want to go back to the asylum in a straightjacket. That's the last thing I want. Not after I've gotten this far...I'd have to lie. I started to speak, but I felt my eyes droop, and I realized I was starting to slip into unconsciousness.

"Lost...con...control..." was all I could get out before I passed out.

-Mikey'sPOV-

"Mikey, it can't be true...not him!" Alicia comforted me as I wept. I had heard from the policeman himself. It had to be true! The shoe was proof, and I dropped it in front of me as I lost control of my emotions and started sobbing in the middle of the living room.

"Alicia, it's true...but I don't know why! Gerard was so happy! He had Elle and he was getting so much better!" I cried out. Suddenly Ray, Bob and Frank walked out groggily, wondering what the noise was about.

"Mikey?" Bob asked, afraid of the position I was in, curled up in Alicia's arms and sobbing like a little kid without candy. I didn't really hear him, and I kept repeating the phrase that confused me.

"...but Gerard was so happy...but Gerard was so fucking happy!" I wailed, and Alicia held me closer. Frank rushed over and knelt down to my side, giving me a look of horror.

"Mikey, what are you saying? Gerard's...gone?!" he choked on the last word, biting his lip to hold back tears. I just nodded, not wanting to elaborate. Frank, who was holding onto my shoulder, let go and fell down and broke down like I had. Soon the room was filled with sobs, and it was depressing to say the least. Why Gerard? Why him? Why do it when he was so happy?

About an hour later the phone rang, and the lot of us were still crying, but silently. I ran up to get the phone, hoping my voice wasn't revealing my feelings too much.

"Hello?" I sniffled.

"Hello, is this Michael Way?"

"Yes."

"Hi, we're from the Newark Community Hospital, and we're calling in concern to your brother, Gerard..."

Shit...they want me to identify the body. I can't do this.

"Yes? What about him?"

"We need you down here to fill out information about him. Such as birthday, mother's maiden name, etc...plus, the doctor would like to inform you on his health..."

"Health? Why that? He's dead, he has no health."

'Mr. Way, Gerard is very much alive..."

*****

I ran through the doors and up to the room that the receptionist had specified. I felt something fall out of my pocket, and it turned out to be Gerard's journal. I must've left it in my pocket from before. It crashed to the floor and a piece of paper flew out of the pages. I picked it up and I gasped at the words on it, scribbled and crossed out but still readable.I do not like Mikey in that way! I do not! I WILL NOT!

I placed the paper back into the ruffled pages and slowly walked to the room. I couldn't believe it...was this what Gerard was in the asylum for? Was this why he always acted funny whenever I mentioned Alicia?

Was this why he drove off the bridge?

I walked into his room and saw his pale blue-like skin. His hair was still wet, and it was slick back, and the heart monitor beeped into the silent air. I pulled up a chair to his bed and I took his hand, taking notice of the cold sensation he brought. I took his hand and put it up to my cheek, and I let it stay there. Suddenly I felt his hand move, and I dropped it in response. He opened his eyes and looked over to me. He smiled at first, but then he frowned and closed his eyes again.

"AW FUCK! WHY HIM?! WHY NOT ELLE!?" he yelled into the air. This only made that note more ironic, and it scared me.

Seeing him alive, and not at the bottom of the river, was something I treasured forever. Yet something else was on my mind....something much more serious.

"Gerard, what's this?" I asked, ignoring the reason why he was in here in the first place, since it wasn't important to me anymore. This was the most important thing now.

"I...what is that?"

"Your note...the one that shows you trying not to fall in love with me." I slowly said, finding it hard to say. He sighed and looked at me with glassy eyes.

"...it's taken me too fucking long to tell you..."

"Tell me what?"

"That...I've fallen in love with you."

"Ok." I simply said. That was all I needed to hear.

"Ok? That's it? No, 'WHAT THE FUCK YOU SICKO?' or 'Are you out of your mind?'"

"No...I...I'm surprisingly okay with this..."

"What? Why?"

Then that's when it hit me. Why I felt so many emotions for him. Why, whenever he was depressed, I couldn't help but feel depressed as well. Why I only wanted to be with him all the time instead of just hanging out with the others.

I had felt the same way.

It was a brotherly love...it was real love, believe it or not.

I gave him the note and smiled, and through my eyes, he was able to tell that I felt the same way, even though he probably never thought so. I didn't matter that we were brothers. It was love between two people, and that was it. I leaned in slowly to hold his face in my hand, and he smiled and closed his eyes at my embrace. I leaned in while his eyes were shut and kissed him gently on the lips, taking him totally by surprise. He smiled against our kissed and I pulled away, wanting to see him smile. We looked at each other with so much love that it could fill up the room and flow out of the door if it could. He took my hands and sighed, but then his smile faded to a slight frown, and I turned my head in confusion.

"Mikey...what about Alicia? And Elle?"

"What about them?"

"What are we going to do about them?"

It made sense. I still loved Alicia, and I'm pretty sure Gerard still loved Elle....damn, he had a good point.