We've Learned to Run from Anything Uncomfortable

Wednesday June 1st,

School has been a drag the last three days. I’ve been waiting to see Sam all week. It’s ridiculous. They only have visiting hours from like 12-2, which does me no good, because I’m stuck in school. But I finally talked Lynn into it last night, and she let me leave school early to go and visit Sam today.

I almost thought she was playing a cruel joke on me this morning when she told me that she called me in and I could leave at 11:30.

I clutched the CD that I had brought for Sam tightly in my hand as I locked my car doors. The weather was a little warmer today, I had left my jacket in the car as I walked up to the front doors to the hospital. I made my way up to the counter where I set my hands down and cleared my throat.

“Can I help you?” A nurse looked up at me, a sneer set across her face. She had that look. That one that reeked of, "I don't approve of your tattoos and piercings."

“Um, yeah. ‘M lookin’ fer Sam…” I paused, realizing I had absolutely no idea what Sam’s last name was, “Oi, I dunno 'er last name."

"Well, I'm afraid Sam isn't going to get you very far."

"She was brought in a few days ago, 'er mum stabbed 'er.." I mumbled.

She looked up at me, her eyes lit up, "Oh, Sam Terret. Yeah, she isn't accepting visitors."

"Look, I've been waitin' days to come and see Sammeh, now can yeh please just let meh see 'er?"

"I'm sorry. But I can't."

"Can yeh at leas' page 'er room er somethin'?" I groaned, leaning back.

She shot me a look and picked up the phone, checked a list and dialed a few numbers, "Hi Maggie. Yeah, I've got a very persistent visitor here, trying to see Sam." She nodded, "Yeah. I told him that she didn't want visitors." She paused slightly, "Why do you need his name?"

She looked up at me and I wasted no time blurting out, "'M Olleh."

"Oli." She muttered, "Yes. He's got a British accent. Why does that- Alright. Mag, I'll send him up."

She slammed the phone down roughly, looked up at me and muttered, "Room 405. Second floor."

I quickly turned on my heel, not wanting to lose my opportunity to see Sam. I pushed myself into an elevator, standing next to a older, sickly looking woman, with no one to help her at the hospital, when really, someone should be with her every second of the day, seeing as how she was running low on life.

I shuddered lightly and turned my head the other way, coming face to face with a young kid, coughing and sputtering. I rolled my eyes, wiped the spit he left on my face and averted my gaze to the plastic case containing my favorite CD.

I read all of the song titles, only one in particular jumping out at me, called "In The End". I really wanted Sam to listen to it, because when I listened to it, I thought of her. Every single line in that song reminded me of her, and I wanted her to know that.

The elevator slowed to a stop, making my stomach hit the tops of my shoes. I dived out of the elevator, a slight bounce in my step as I looked around for room 405.

401, 403. My stomach fluttered lightly, as I came face to face with room 405.

I stood outside the door, breathing heavily as I thought about what to say to Sam.

"Hello Dear, you must be Oli." An older woman with once-red hair smiled at me.

"Oi, 'ow'd yeh know?"

"Sammy in there, she talks about you constantly. She's only been here about three days, and I already know everything about you."

I nodded slightly at her and stepped into the room, seeing Sam perched up on the small cot, the crisp white, sheets pulled up to her chin. I watched as she lifted a plastic cup to her small mouth, taking a sip of water and a grin grace her lips as she flipped the channel to come across a cartoon, with a grey cat chasing around a small brown mouse.

I took another step forward and coughed lightly. I watched as Sam's gaze caught mine and her face broke out into a full-on grin. She sat up in her bed quickly and held her arms out in my direction.

"Oli! What are you doing here? Aren‘t you supposed to be at school or whatever?" She laughed, wrapping her weak arms around me. I gripped her tightly, resting my head on her shoulder.

I pulled away from her and grinned, "Sammeh Doll. I tried comin' earlier, but Lynn needed meh aroun' the 'ouse, and then school, all that shit and it was jus' ridiculous."

"It's okay Oli. I'm glad you showed up. I've been waiting for you to come by."

"Yeah, I 'eard everyone 'n their dog is tryin' teh visit yeh." I said, taking a seat next to her bed.

She scoffed, "Yeah. They have. Fucking morons. You know, nobody gives a flying fuck about me until I get my ass kicked and stabbed."

"Oi, Sammeh. Tha' ain' true."

"Don't blow smoke up my ass Oli, you know it is."

"I gave a flyin' fuck." I grinned.

"Well, when I said everybody, I meant everybody but you." She smiled softly, meeting my gaze.

"Did I ever tell yeh tha' yeh've got yerself some killeh eyes?"

A sudden blush took over her cheeks and she looked down at her covers, pulling at the corner of them, "No." She smiled, "I don't think you did."

"Well yeh do. They remind meh of Tommeh."

"Tommy?" She questioned, looking up.

"Meh brother. 'E's got eyes like yer's, 'cept yer's are bigger, girlier, and prettier."

"Well, I'm glad you like them." She giggled nervously.

"I like 'em quite a bit." I grinned.

"Where is your brother anyways? Tommy?"

I rubbed my hands together roughly, "Oi. 'E's back at 'ome, in Sheffield."

"Why aren't you back home?"

"Got meh ass in some shit, made meh mum and dad mad."

"What did you do?"

"Jesus, Sammeh." I laughed nervously, "Since when 'ave yeh become so interested in meh life?"

"Well, I figured since you know everything about me, I should know at least a couple of things about you."

"Fair enough." I smiled, "I guess I'll 'ave teh tell yeh the story, oi?"

She nodded slightly and smiled, sitting back.

"Alright. Well, one nigh', meh mum and dad had this really big job interview fer somethin'..." I began.

"Olleh, Tommeh. We'll be back aroun' midnigh' tonigh'. Be good please."

"Oi mum!" Tom yelled, coming out of his room, "It alright if Matt come's over?"
"That's fine."

I watched as my mum and dad left through the front door. I turned to face Tom and grinned. A knock at our back door signaled everyone had arrived carefully, without my parents noticing. I ran and opened the door, watching as our guests arrived.

SJ, a really tall, hot blonde walked through the door and I followed right after her, watching her hips swing from side to side as she walked through my kitchen, trying to locate the alcohol.

"Yeh lookin' fer this?" I grinned, pulling a bottle of Vodka from underneath the counter.

"Oi, tha's exactly what 'm lookin' fer." She smiled.

In less than an hour and a half, SJ and I were so hammered, we could barely stand up straight. We retreated to my bedroom, shedding clothing and swapping spit as we made our way to the bed.

What we did was sloppy, drunk, and disgusting. We were teenagers and the only thing on our mind that night was getting off.

After pulling my clothes on, my shirt on inside out, and missing one sock, I threw myself into the hallway, screaming something to the extent of, "I jus' fucked SJ!"

I rounded the corner to the house I'd been living in for the last sixteen years and fell into our glass table, sending shards everywhere.

"Oi Olleh!" Tom yelled, "Go sit down ya wanka."

On my way to the kitchen table, I managed to knock over at least fifteen glass cups, sending even more glass skittering across our hardwood floors.

"Oi fuck." I muttered to myself, getting the broom, "I need teh clean this up."

I backed my ass up against the wall and began sweeping the glass into the dustpan. As I stood up to dump out the glass shards, I stumbled into the stove, turning it on without a slight notice to the fact that there was a washcloth on the burner.

"Needless teh say.." I finished, "My mum and dad came home with good news 'n they was so mad, they fergot teh tell us. I broke every glass thing in tha' 'ouse."

"And you fucked SJ?" Sam smiled, arching her eyebrow.

"And I bonked SJ." I sighed, laughing slightly.

"Wow, Mr. Sykes."

I scoffed lightly, "Yeah. So tha's why 'm stuck 'ere without Tommeh."

"You miss Tom." She stated.

She didn't ask. She stated the fact, knowing that I did miss Tom.

"Yeah, 'e's meh lil' bro. O'course I miss 'im."

"Well, I bet he misses you. Anyone would be crazy not to."

I grinned sheepishly, looking up at her, "Anyone is crazy teh even talk teh me."

"Then I guess I'm just psycho, huh?"

“That yeh are, Sam. That yeh are.” I grinned, “Speaking of which, did tha’ freak get arrested er anythin'?"

"I don't fucking know.." She sighed, "I'm just glad I'm out of there. I couldn't handle it anymore."

"All the beatin' n' what not?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"Why'd she do it?"

Sam looked at me, her big, blue eyes quickly filled with tears and her bottom lip quivered a bit. I could see fear written all over her face. She was scared of something. I'm sure, but I dunno what.

"Sammeh?" I asked, "Sam. Are yeh alrigh'?"

"Yeah Oli. I'm fine."

"Well, then wha' happened? Do yeh not wanna tell meh?"

"No. I do. I'm just trying to find the best way to do so..." She said, trailing off.

We sat in silence for a few minutes before she opened her mouth and whispered something quietly.

"Wha' yeh say?"

"I said I killed her son."

"Yeh did wha'?!" I asked, my head snapping up and meeting her eyes, her scared expression showing through even more now.

"I hit her son. In a car. He was standing on the corner and I was driving drunk... And I hit him." She mumbled, pulling at the IV attached to the back of her hand.

"Really funny joke, Sam. Ha ha." I muttered sarcastically, not at all amused by her 'joke'.

Suddenly, her face lit up, with some emotion along the lines of relief, "Ha! I got you on that one, huh? Funny, right?" She grinned.

"Yeah Sam. Hilarious. Yer sooo brill."

"Jesus Oli. Don't get your panties in a twist. It was a joke. I'm sorry."

"I guess I can fergive yeh."

"You have to. I haven't had a smoke in like three days Oli. I'm losing my mind!" She said, raising her voice and wiggling her hands in the air.

She brought a slight chuckle to my face, "Yeh need teh chill the fuck out, Sam. I think yeh'll live without a smoke."

"Nope Oli. I'm seriously dying in here." She sighed over-dramatically, leaning back in the bed.

"Nice, eh. Outfit." I grinned, looking at her pale blue scrubs that tied in the back.

"You wanna try it on? I've got more in the closet!"

"Oi Doll, no thanks." I laughed, holding up both my hands.

We sat in the quiet, letting our laughs suppress a bit. Sam's breathing steadied and she curled up in her bed, with the scratchy blanket pulled tight to her body.

"Yeh know Sam, I like yeh better when yer in a good mood."

She rolled her eyes at me a little, "Well, I'm glad I could be of service."

"Oh hush." I smiled.

"What are people saying about me at school Oli?" She asked, changing the topic quickly.

"What do yeh mean?" I asked, knowing exactly what she meant.

"Don't give me that shit Oli."

I thought back about the last few days at school and all week, all I'd been hearing were stories upon stories. I mean, on Friday what LeeAnn told me about Sophomore year, and on Monday, there were rumors floating around Sam started up heroin again or something.

One guy told me she got caught stealing someone's car after she smoked like 10 bowls of weed or some bullshit.

I even heard that she was pregnant and her foster mom was so pissed at her, she threw her down the stairs and Sam ended up with a miscarriage. It took all I could do not to pummel everyone at that school.

Finally, I ran up to one of the Freshman I saw Sam get out of the car with one morning and asked her. She simply told me that Lucy stabbed Sam twice in the stomach and that's why she was in the hospital.

"They're jus' sayin' that yer in the 'ospital.. Wha' else?"

She looked at me and tilted her head slightly, not believing a thing I was saying as she sighed, "Okay Oli. I'm sure there's no rumors floating around at all."

"Even if there is, wha's teh point in meh tellin' yeh? It's jus' gonna piss yeh off, Sam."

She nodded slightly, "Yeah. I guess you're right."

"'M always right." I grinned.

Suddenly, the nurse burst into the room, "Oli Dear, visting time is over. You can come back tomorrow, though. Alright?"

I watched as Sam's playful grin collapsed into a frown, "Bye Oli."

"Do yeh know when yer gettin' outta 'ere?"

"No. I'm not sure yet."

"Well." I said, handing her the CD, "I want yeh to have this, okay? I want yeh ta listen teh "In The End".”

She looked up at me with her gorgeous blue eyes and smiled, "Are you giving this to me?"

"Yes, Sammeh. Its all yours."

"Thanks."

I kissed her cheek softly, dragging a finger down her arm, "Yer welcome."

I walked out of the room in a daze, a happy smirk slapped right on my face and a bounce in my step as I rounded the corner to leave the hospital.