Elle.

One day after school Jude snuck over telling his family he had something to do at the school. I didn’t bother trying to remember the excuse because I knew he was coming over to see me.

My lumpy, old brown couch wasn’t the ideal place to cuddle but we had to settle with what we had.

“You know we never do what we plan?” Jude whispered as he stroked my hair “We haven’t worked on our project in so long.”

Jude’s statement reminded me about my phone call from Reni. It had been a while since and I hadn’t called her back fearing what she wanted to tell me.

“About that,” I sighed and sat up in what would’ve been his lap. “I’ve been in contact with someone that knew my mom. She called me recently saying there was something important she needed to tell me.”

“And did you talk to her?” Jude propped himself up on his elbows and listened intently.

I looked over with a sad almost scared look. “No, I’m afraid of what she’ll tell me. The way she looks at means…she makes me feel fragile. Like you did when we first met.”

Jude hummed and scooted me off his legs so he could sit up properly. “You probably need to talk to her. Whatever she wants to tell you she obviously thinks you can handle it now. If you want I could go with you.”

His offer sent off a red flag in my mind. “No, I don’t think that’s a good idea. Besides your family will be wondering where you are soon. I should go alone, I think Reni would like it best that way.” I slipped on my shiny red heels and pulled out my cell phone.

“Are you sure b-“

“Yes, Jude, I’m sure.” He looked a little hurt but I couldn’t risk Reni not telling me something I needed to know.

“Okay, call me later then?” He stood up and began to make his way to the door.

“Of course. I’ll tell you everything that I find out.” I leaned up on the tips of my toes to kiss his cheek and say goodbye.

Once the door shut completely I dialed Reni’s number and waited for an answer.

-

I sat down at the same table as before in the corner of the coffee shop and waited on Reni. She insisted that if we met today I had to be there at a certain time, and I was, but she was running late.

I took a deep breath and stirred my cup of hot cocoa. Staring out of a window waiting to her some very important news wasn’t one of my favorite pass times.

When I became furious with waiting I nearly stood up to leave until a flash of bright orange hair caught my attention. I sat back down and finished the last sip of my drink.

“I am so sorry, Elle!” Reni rushed over to my table with a frantic look on her face. “I just had so much stuff to take care of and I lost track of time. She looked down at her watch and I noticed her eyes bulged little then she looked back up.

I simply nodded, fed up with the situation. “You had something important to tell me?”

“Oh yes.” Her voice trailed off and she looked down at her hands on the dark wood table. She wiggled the engagement ring around her finger the looked back up and sighed. “Your father is sick.”

Her words caught me off guard and I questioned her meaning. “Sick? Sick how? I just saw him this morning. He is fine.

“No he isn’t, Elle. He has Cirrhosis of the liver; it’s very mild right now but could gradually get worse. That’s why he is getting help now and going to AA.” Her face was very grave as she spoke.

“What? I don’t believe you! Ryan would have told me this! If he is dying he would have told me!” My voice raised a few pitches than I had meant and soon everyone in the little café was staring at me.

“Elle, you’re making a scene. Please sit down. I have more to tell you.” Reni clasped her hands together and settled them in her lap.

“I don’t want to hear anything else you have to say! My dad told me he was going to AA to get better for me.” Tears had swelled up in my eyes. I knew coming here she was going to tell me something I didn’t want to know and I was right.

“Yes, Elle he is. Do you think he really wants to leave you?” The sadness in her eyes softened the harshness I felt towards her and I sat down willingly. “If the worse happens and…well I am one of your possible legal guardians.”

“One of? Who is the other?” I became slightly hopeful that it might be my mother.

“Brendon Urie. Ryan tells me that you know him well.” She looked away quickly and then back at me with almost a hint of happiness in her voice. “But I want you to know I would greatly take care of you.”

“You’re kidding me right? If my dad dies my mom wouldn’t even take care of me then? So not only would I not have the only person who has ever taken care of me and loved me, my own mother wouldn’t come back to raise me?”

Reni’s face fell. “Elle, she can’t.”

I looked away and mumbled “And why the hell not?”

“Because Elle...” Reni paused and looked at me carefully in the eyes.”Your mother died in a car accident when you were two years old.”

I sat in the little booth at the coffee shop and cried my eyes out. Reni tried to comfort me by saying things like “She loved you so much.” And “She always wanted a baby girl. You were a miracle to her.” But her words were useless considering I didn’t hear any of them. I always had a feeling deep down in my gut that there was a real reason Ryan never talked about my mother but I never suspected her to be dead.

My world came crashing down in a little coffee shop.

-

Reni soon left after the mass of my breakdown had occurred and she was sure I was well enough to drive. She was the one who had been taking Ryan to his meetings and doctor’s appointments. A chill ran up my spine as I thought about him keeping all these secrets from me.

I fiercely whipped a tear away from my face as I sped down my street and pulled into Jude’s driveway. All other worries had escaped my mind as I felt the need to just see him and calm down as best I could. So when I knocked on the door three times and Kimberly answered it brought me back down to me daily life.
“What are you doing here?” Her snarled expression stung me somewhere deep in my heart. Before I could speak her face changed and she seemed concerned. “I’ll go get Jude.”

I stood in the door frame and tried to make my red blotchy face seem more approachable but only worsened my state. Normally I would’ve smiled seeing my boyfriend bound down the stairs but this time I could barely speak.

“Elle, what’s wrong?” Jude’s long arms enclosed me and he smoothed down my hair trying to stop my silent weeping. “What did that Reni girl say to you?”

I took a few deep sighs and looked up into his chocolate browns eyes. “My dad is could die and my mom already did.”

Jude looked shocked and pulled me closer to his chest hiding the new wave of sobs.