You Should Know

Ready? Victoria asks, glancing at me to make sure.

I nod.

Are you sure? She wants to know.

Yes.

I nod again.

I’m ready.

She opens a box and her face brightens.

I peek over her shoulder; it’s the box with all the photo albums.

Oh God. Remember this? - Victoria asks, pulling out and flipping open a photo album completely full of pictures I took the time I came on tour with you.

She’s pointing to the one of us on my birthday.

The ones both before and after Gabe pushed my face into the cake, which led to the cake fight and a messy bus.

It’s nice to reminisce over them.

It’s calming, in a way, reassuring.

I feel lucky to have had the time I did with everyone instead of the sadness that it’s over and the knowledge that it will never be the same.

I know you’ll feel the same when you see them, too.

Don’t be sad when you see these.

I want you to be happy.

It’s all I want.

There’s one album that doesn’t have you in it.

It’s the smallest one; mostly pictures of me growing up.

I never knew my parents; only my grandma.

I told you before: she died shortly before I met you.

You remember.

She would have loved you.

Maybe I’ll see her soon.

I made it through losing someone, so you can too.

I’m sorry.