You Should Know

I find myself almost crying because I’m so proud of you.

I don’t shed any tears because Victoria worked so hard on my makeup.

I’ll save the tears for later.

I always knew you five would make it.

I couldn’t disappoint you, Alex.

That’s why I didn’t tell you.

Please don’t hate me.

I hope you’ll understand someday.

I just want you to be happy.

Your set goes by too fast for my liking.

It’s over before I know it.

I stay put.

Victoria said she’d find me, and I’d told her I’d sit near the bar, so I stay where I am.

But after awhile I get tired of waiting- even though I know I should be patient, since you’re all probably talking with fans.

So I go to look for her.

I’m on my way to the door when I freeze.

Because you’re standing a few feet away, and I suddenly can’t breathe.

Your chocolate eyes lock with mine, and this isn’t part of the plan.

Your eyes widen as you realize it’s me, or at least someone resembling me.

Wait-

I hear you begin, but by the time it registers in my brain, I’m out the door and desperately hailing a cab.

You follow me.

I know, because I see you standing near the entrance as the taxi pulls away from the curb.

I’ll have to call Victoria as soon as I get back.

I’m sorry I ran from you.

Please don’t hate me.

I hope you’ll understand someday.

I hope you’ll forgive me.

I’m sorry.

I love you.