Heroes...And The Rest Of Us.

Adam follows the hostess over to our table and leans down and gives Billie a small kiss on the cheek, then he sits down beside me, putting his arm around the back of my chair. The hostess asks him if he would like a menu to order from.

"No, that's OK. Just bring me whatever she's having, and a coffee." He says, gesturing at me with his hand. She nods and walks away.

"Good morning." He says to Billie once she's gone.

"Good morning. You sound a lot more chipper than you did when I talked to you earlier."

"A hot shower will do that for a person." He says with a smile. He then turns to me.

"Shawn called me after you left."

"Which Shawn?"

"Our tour manager."

"What did he say?"

"He said that we're starting a small tour in a couple of weeks, and to show up to rehearsals on monday."

"How long is the tour?"

"He said three weeks tops." I nod.

"Well, we'll just have to deal with that when it comes." I say.

"We'll tell Jack today, so that he's prepared. That's not really something I want to spring on him the day before I leave."

"Exactly." Billie is observing us having this coversation.

"Have you guys sent in the finished copy of the record to the label yet?" She asks Adam.

"Yeah. They're releasing the first single to the radio tomorrow."

"And already sending you on a tour? Wow."

"Yeah, it all moves pretty fast when it starts."

"Do you have a release date for the album?"

"No, but I'm sure when that happens there will be more touring. Hopefully Jack will be good enough to be by himself by that time, and Sophie can come with me."

The waitress comes back and gives us our food, and Adam's coffee. I pick at my oatmeal, which is usually my favorite thing to eat when I come here, but after Adam's announcement about the tour I've kind of lost my appetite. We talk about random things for the rest of the meal, and afterwards we all drive home seprately. I follow Adam in my car back to the house, thinking about how I'm going to deal with the Jack situation when he's gone. How am I supposed to handle it all by myself? When we get back to the house, I park my car in the driveway and get in the passenger side of Adam's.

"Ready to go?" He asks me as I put my seat belt on and light a cigarette.

"Yeah, lets get this show on the road." I breathe smoke out of my mouth, rolling down my window to let the smoke out.

"I don't like this anymore than you do. But, you know I have to do it." He says a few minutes later.

"I know. I'm not upset because you're leaving. I'm upset because I can't go with you. But, I know it's what I have to do, for you and for Jack."

"It'll be alright. You can stay here and make sure he's OK."

"And, what if he's not OK? What do I do if something happens with him and you're gone?"

"He'll be fine." I sigh.

"And, what about you? Will you be fine?"

"I don't think there is anything I can say that will make you believe that."

"You're probably right. No matter what, I will always worry. And, it has nothing to do with me not having faith in you, Babe, it's just, I know what goes down out there."

"I'll be good. I promise." I smile at him and take his hand in mine.

We arrive at the rehab center an hour later. We park across the street from the building and walk to it holding hands. Adam is ahead of me slightly, leading me. We go straight into the building, past the front lobby clerk, and up the stairs to the second floor, where Jack is staying. We go up to a woman who is sitting behind a desk on the second floor.

"We're here for a meeting with Dr. Clark." Adam says to her. She looks at some notes on her desk.

"Adam and Sophie Gontier?"

"Yes."

"It says here that you're here to pick up Jack Peterson?"

"Yes."

"OK. You're a little early. Dr. Clark is in another meeting right now, but you're welcome to go and wait with Jack in his room. I can come and get you when the Doctor is out of his meeting."

"But, they told me that I couldn't go in his room when I was here yesterday." I say to her.

"Why?"

"The whole co-ed cohabitating thing."

"Oh honey, please. We all know Jack here, and we've heard him talk about you two. You can go back there. I trust that there will be no rule breaking."

"Thank you." I say.

"His room is down that hallway, the last door on the right."

"Thank you." Adam says and leads me off to the hallway. The door to the room is open when we get there. I see Jack standing in front of his bed with his back to us, putting something in his duffel bag that I brought him when I came yesterday. Adam knocks on the door with the side of his hand to alert Jack that we're standing here. He turns around and smiles when he see's us.

"Hey." He says, coming over to us. He gives me a protector type of hug, wrapping his big arms around me tightly, kissing the top of my head lightly. It almost feels like our roles are reversed in this moment, and he's the one taking care of me.

"How're you doing, Mama?" He asks me.

"I'm good. How're you?" I ask as he releases me. He shakes Adam's hand and they do a little half hug thing.

"Good. Ready to get out of here." He says with a smile.

"Are you all packed?" Adam asks.

"Almost. I didn't bring a lot of shit, ya know? They gave me a bunch of shit to take home though, so it's a good thing you brought me the duffel bag."

He moves the duffel bag from his bed and we all sit down indian style in a circle on it, and talk for a while. Adam has my wrist in his hand and is tracing all the shapes and lines of my tribal butterfly tattoo with his finger. He has the same tattoo on his wrist, except mine has his three initials on the under part of my wrist. After a while, we tell Jack about the tour.

"So, you guys are leaving?" He asks.

"Adam is leaving, I'm staying here with you."

"That's fucked up. You should go, you shouldn't have to stay here just because of me."

"I'm not leaving you here by yourself for any reason. And, under no circumstances are you going out on the road. Adam and I both know what it's like out there, and it's no place for someone like you, that is just getting out of rehab and trying to put their life back together. I'm not really even happy with Adam going out there without me, but I understand that you need me more here, than he needs me out there."

"It'll be fine. I'm only going to be gone for like, three weeks." Adam finally pipes in.

"You quit your job so you could go out with Adam on tour, and now that I'm here and fucked up, you can't go." Jack says to me.

"Listen to me, both of you." I say with a sigh.

"I love you both more than anything in this world. You guys are my world, my reason to get out of bed everyday. I would and I will do anything that you need me to do. Right now, I know that you, Adam, will be OK on the road without me. I trust that you will not let me down, or let the rest of the people that count on you down. I know that I have to be with you right now, Jack. We've made it this far without falling apart, a couple of weeks aren't going to kill us. I don't want you to feel like me not going with Adam is your fault, OK? There will be other tours that I can go on." Adam nods and squeezes my hand. He knows it's not easy for me to put all my feelings out there like that. Jack doesn't say anything, so I squeeze his hand.

"I love you." I tell him.

"I love you, too. Both of you." I smile at him.

"So, that's the end of it. Adam will go on tour and do what he loves to do, and you and I will stay here and wait for him to come home. And, work on getting you back on your feet again."

"Can I tell you guys something?" Jack asks.

"Yeah, anything." Adam tells him.

"I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"Being at home. It's easy being clean here. There's no temptation, no one from outside putting shit in your face. At home, there's no protection from that."

"That's what we're here for, Babe." I tell him. I hear a knock on the door of the room, and when we turn around to see who it is, I see the woman from the front desk.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you guys, but Dr. Clark is ready to see you now." She says. Adam and I look at each other, then we look at Jack and get up from the bed.

"Get the rest of your shit packed, and we'll be back in a few minutes to get you." Adam says to him.

"OK." Adam and I follow the woman, who is dressed in nurses scrubs, back to Dr. Clark's office. She knocks on the door and opens it, leading us inside. The Doctor is sitting behind his desk. He smiles at us and motions for us to sit down in the two chairs that are sitting in front of his desk. There is also a couch against the back wall of the office, with a chair sitting in front of it and a side table.

"Thank you, Linda." He says to the woman who brought us in. She smiles at him and leaves, shutting the door behind her.

"OK, thank you guys for coming in here today. This is just a routine meeting that we do with people who aren't related to our patients that come to take them home. We just go over the things that you are going to need to provide for the patient when they go home, that a relative might already know. Believe it or not, having a relative take care of a patient after leaving rehab is much different than having a non-relative."

"OK." Adam says, looking at me confused.

"Since Jack doesn't appear to have any family in the near area, and you two have stepped up to take the reign, there are a lot of things that you have to do. A lot of which it appears that you've already been doing for some time now. Jack seems very fond of both of you, and he speaks of you in our sessions a lot."

"We're very fond of him, too. He's almost like a son to us." I say. Adam is still looking at the Doctor with a quizzical look on his face, but he nods when I talk.

"That's good. When we have patients being taken care of by family members, it provides a stable environment for the patient. With family members, the patients don't often feel like they have to prove themselves worthy of being loved and taken care of, it just comes naturally. When they are taken in by a friend or someone else that isn't related, they sometimes feel like they are a burden to whomever is taking care of them."

"OK." I say. I can tell that I'm going to have to do all the talking here. Adam doesn't look like he really knows what to say, this whole meeting feels very strange.

"So, that being said. You two need to provide Jack with a stable, loving, place to fall, we'll say. He cannot have any tension or animosity between you two, because that will affect him. If he see's you falling apart, it may very well cause him to fall apart. I'm not telling you not to be yourselves, but you need to be aware of the fact that you have someone who is depending on you one-hundred percent. Taking care of someone who has just checked out of rehab is almost like having a newborn child. You have to be there all the time and know what's going on with that person one-hundred percent of the time." As he is saying all of this, it makes me wonder about Adam. Who took care of him when he checked out of rehab. I can't imagine it being his parents, or any of his siblings even. I look over at him and see him looking intently at the Doctor.

"I think we can do that." He says. The first words he's said since we got in here.

"Good. Now, yesterday when you came in, Mrs. Gontier, they should have given you some books and some pamphlets."

"Yes they did."

"Alright, I'm gonna give you some more references. I gave Jack some books too, so make sure he's reading those when he's at home, those will be important in his recovery."

"OK." He reaches into his desk and pulls some stuff out, handing it to Adam and I.

"OK, well, it was very nice to meet you both. Jack has been a wonderful patient, and we wish him and you all the best in his recovery." We all stand up. The doctor shakes both of our hands and follows us out to the main area of the offices. Adam and I go to Jack's room again. He's sitting on his bed smoking a cigarette with his duffel bag in front of him. He looks up at us when we walk in.

"Ready to go?" Adam asks him.

"Hell yes." He puts the cigarette out in an ashtray that is sitting on his bedside table and picks up his duffel bag, following us out of the room. I hold his hand as we walk outside of the building, and as we walk across the street to where the Tahoe is parked, Adam puts his arm around my shoulders.

My little family, back the way we're supposed to be... for now. I know this isn't going to be the death of us. We're just getting started. I'm not scared about the tour anymore, I think putting my feelings out there for Adam and Jack to hear helped me with that. I understand that this is what Adam does for a living, and this is what he loves to do, more than anything. So, how can I be mad about that? I just have to be supportive, even if I can't be with him. Jack is going to be alright too, I know he is. I have to have faith that both of my guys are going to be OK, just like Billie said at the restaurant earlier. Sometimes life is a bitch, but I sure am glad that I'm going through it with the people that I am.