Learning How to Swim
I Miss You
“I need to talk to you, Alyssa. This has gone on long enough!” Steven told me, jerking me aside the second I stepped outside of the school building.
“What is your deal?” I hissed, jerking my wrist out of his hand. “What are you whining about now?”
“What has happened to you? What happened to the girl that always brightened my day? What did you do with her?”
I glared at him. “She drowned, Steven. She fucking drowned, but I saved her by getting gills!”
He stared at me for a minute. “Cut the crap! I want straight answers.” He caught my arm again rather roughly. Steven didn’t use to do that. He used to only touch my arm gently.
“Don’t touch me!” I hissed, glaring at him as he refused to let go. “I don’t know what your problem is, but—”
He cut me off. “Since when did your pupils dilate so much, Alyssa?”
I growled at him, jerking myself away from him. “You had better shut your mouth, Steven! Or I swear to God—”
“My precious Valentine, is Quigg bothering you?” Adam asked me, suddenly right beside me.
I smiled. “No, we were just catching up. There was nothing to talk about, right, Steven?”
He sighed, frowning. “Right. Nothing.”
I felt his eyes on us as we walked away, hand in hand. Roselyn and the rest of the gang caught up with us soon enough.
“You’re coming over for practice, right, Val?” Adam asked me, smiling as we walked down the street.
“I sure hope so or I’m going to have fun walking home!” I teased, kissing his cheek. Roselyn ran ahead, leaving Quincy to talk to Vincent and Alicia.
“What was the kid’s deal? You friends with him?” she asked, glancing back at Steven.
“I used to be. I thought I could trust him, but he sure as fuck proved me wrong. We almost had a thing, but—it doesn’t matter. I’m done with him,” I told her, feeling Adam’s eyes on me.
“Are you sure?” he asked me, a scowl on his face. “I can beat him up for you.”
“Adam, do I smell jealousy?” I asked him, kind of singing. I grinned absurdly.
“Oh, I could have sworn I put on deodorant this morning,” he teased, rolling his eyes. “I just don’t like the guy, okay?”
I stopped smiling as my phone started vibrating in my pocket. I pulled it out, but the caller I.D. said that it was Steven calling probably just to chat. I shoved it back in my pocket, but I felt a note. He must have slipped it in my pocket...
I can’t say how sorry I am. But what did you want me to do? She could have died. But you probably don’t care about that because you’re heading down that path! Remember when you told me that you couldn’t watch as your sister drowned? Well, I know how it feels to watch someone you love face their demons. And I think you know what I’m talking about. Please, stop taking the meth. I miss you, Alyssa.
—Steven
Love?
I tried to hide it, but Adam snatched it saying, “What are you looking at, love?” His eyes scanned over it and his face fell. “I hate him.”
“I know,” I mumbled, taking the note back and shoving it in my pocket.
I couldn’t help but steal a glance back. My bus drove past us and I saw Steven staring out the window. Adam flipped him off, but all I could think about was the note.
Well, I know how it feels to watch someone you love face their demons.
Did he mean his sister...or me?
“What is your deal?” I hissed, jerking my wrist out of his hand. “What are you whining about now?”
“What has happened to you? What happened to the girl that always brightened my day? What did you do with her?”
I glared at him. “She drowned, Steven. She fucking drowned, but I saved her by getting gills!”
He stared at me for a minute. “Cut the crap! I want straight answers.” He caught my arm again rather roughly. Steven didn’t use to do that. He used to only touch my arm gently.
“Don’t touch me!” I hissed, glaring at him as he refused to let go. “I don’t know what your problem is, but—”
He cut me off. “Since when did your pupils dilate so much, Alyssa?”
I growled at him, jerking myself away from him. “You had better shut your mouth, Steven! Or I swear to God—”
“My precious Valentine, is Quigg bothering you?” Adam asked me, suddenly right beside me.
I smiled. “No, we were just catching up. There was nothing to talk about, right, Steven?”
He sighed, frowning. “Right. Nothing.”
I felt his eyes on us as we walked away, hand in hand. Roselyn and the rest of the gang caught up with us soon enough.
“You’re coming over for practice, right, Val?” Adam asked me, smiling as we walked down the street.
“I sure hope so or I’m going to have fun walking home!” I teased, kissing his cheek. Roselyn ran ahead, leaving Quincy to talk to Vincent and Alicia.
“What was the kid’s deal? You friends with him?” she asked, glancing back at Steven.
“I used to be. I thought I could trust him, but he sure as fuck proved me wrong. We almost had a thing, but—it doesn’t matter. I’m done with him,” I told her, feeling Adam’s eyes on me.
“Are you sure?” he asked me, a scowl on his face. “I can beat him up for you.”
“Adam, do I smell jealousy?” I asked him, kind of singing. I grinned absurdly.
“Oh, I could have sworn I put on deodorant this morning,” he teased, rolling his eyes. “I just don’t like the guy, okay?”
I stopped smiling as my phone started vibrating in my pocket. I pulled it out, but the caller I.D. said that it was Steven calling probably just to chat. I shoved it back in my pocket, but I felt a note. He must have slipped it in my pocket...
I can’t say how sorry I am. But what did you want me to do? She could have died. But you probably don’t care about that because you’re heading down that path! Remember when you told me that you couldn’t watch as your sister drowned? Well, I know how it feels to watch someone you love face their demons. And I think you know what I’m talking about. Please, stop taking the meth. I miss you, Alyssa.
—Steven
Love?
I tried to hide it, but Adam snatched it saying, “What are you looking at, love?” His eyes scanned over it and his face fell. “I hate him.”
“I know,” I mumbled, taking the note back and shoving it in my pocket.
I couldn’t help but steal a glance back. My bus drove past us and I saw Steven staring out the window. Adam flipped him off, but all I could think about was the note.
Well, I know how it feels to watch someone you love face their demons.
Did he mean his sister...or me?