Lost In You

I opened the door to my house and stepped inside. My mind was racing, do I tell him what I heard? I took off my jacket and shoes with Hayden doing the same. I walked to the kitchen and started a pot of coffee. I think I've seen Hayden drink coffee before... I sat down at the table and motioned Hayden to sit across from me. He sensed the mood and sat quietly waiting for me to speak.

"What the hell is going on?" I started. Hayden tilted his head slightly. "You and Gerard."

"What about us?" he shrugged innocently. "You're the one I want."

"No not that, what's this about him being in The Skeleton Crew and you and your parents and-" I was beginning to hyperventilate from panic. Hayden just sat there for a moment before he clued in to what I was talking about. He didn't seem angry since in seconds he was at my side rubbing my back and whispering sweet nothings. I lightly swatted him off and he returned to his seat. I calmed down and waited. "Well?" I asked.

"How much did you hear?" was all he asked.

"Mostly everything." I raised my head and let my side bangs fall in my face to hide the fear in my eyes.

"I guess I should start from the beginning huh?" he smiled warmly. It was as if he was telling a funny story. This story wasn't funny though. I wasn't laughing. Hayden read my expression and his smile faded. "So yeah in grade nine, two years ago, I torched my house in the country and ran away. Clearly no one caught me and I've been living on my own ever since." he said calmly.

"No shit you didn't get caught. Where do you live now?" this conversation felt casual but inside I was rattled.

"Here and there, right now its an abandoned apartment building downtown." my mouth dropped open.

"Why did you kill them?" I asked barely above a whisper.

"They weren't very nice parents Frankie. Remember last year when we took Anthropology and we learned about the parents who locked their kids away until their brains turned to mush? Yeah that’s what it was like." he said and leaned forward slightly. I didn't know what to say so Hayden continued. "As for Gerard, we used to be really good friends way back when."

“When? I’ve known you both all through high school and not once have you spoken and since when was he part of The Skeleton Crew?” Hayden smiled at me.

“The Crew was around years before I knew you Frankie and you wanna’ know something funny?” he was still smiling.

“What.” I glowered.

“Gerard was the leader.”

“What?” I gasped. “What happened?”

“I thought you would be interested. He quit. Bob and Ray begged him not to and so did I but he just quit for unknown reasons. When people fund out he was on his own they started picking on him as revenge for what we did to them.” Hayden reviewed my expression. “Don’t worry, it was stuff like what we do now.”

“Oh. I thought he was the way he was because of his dad…” Hayden snorted. “What?”

“His dad? His dads amazing! Great guy. What did he tell you?”

“He treated him like a soldier and-“ Hayden burst out laughing. He was gasping for air and hitting the table as I stared t him more confused as ever.

“No way!” he gasped. He was crying from laughter. “The worst that man could have done was take him to too many sport games or give him too much encouragement!”

“He lied to me?” I felt devastated. Hayden quieted down and wiped his eyes.

“Looks like it sugar, sorry but I wouldn’t lie to you. I love you.” I had a lot of thinking to do and so far Hayden seemed to be winning the war over my heart.