You & I Collide

Rachel

There was something I had to do. It would be painful, it would hurt, and I knew that it would make me seem like a total monster...but I had to do it.

Emmett and I were going for a walk in the woods near my house this afternoon, so that seemed like a god time to talk, because we needed tp talk. So when he knocked at the door and I pulled it open to find him greeting me with a huge smile, I felt incredibly guilty.

"Hi, Emmett," I said, trying to make my voice sound as cheerful as possible.

"Hey, Rach," he said, smiling at me. He planted a soft kiss on my lips, and then said, "Are you ready to go?"

I nodded, suddenly realizing with a rush of emotion that his words meant two things to me today. I took his hand and we headed into the woods. I tried not to think about it, but there was no way around it....

"Rachel," Emmett began, looking deep into my eyes. We were in the forest, now, walking among the trees. "There was something I wanted to tell you the other day, something I almost did tell you...but I wasn't sure if it was true, or if I was ready. Now, I know it's true, and that I'm ready for it. Rachel," he said, speaking my name softly. "I love you."

Silence. Shock. Oh my gosh - how could this be happening?

"Oh," I answered, totally stunned.

"You don't have to say it back to me," Emmett said, turning his face away. "I just wanted you to know...."

"Emmett," I said, avoiding having to answer. "I think we need to talk. No - wait - I don't think we do...I know we do."

"Okay," Emmett said, trying not to sound disappointed that I hadn't immediately jumped at the open chance to say that I loved him, too.

I took a deep breath, totally nervous. I reminded myself that I'd done this before, and that I could go through it again. I bit down on my lip, hesitating, then went for it.

"Look, Emmett, I know that things are crazy now what with Rose and the Volturi, and I know that this is gonna seem so ridiculous, mean, and stupid, but before I say what I need to say, I just want to let you know that I've enjoyed every moment I've spent with you. I'm so happy that we've been able to share these feelings, so happy to be able to have someone to talk to and be with, to have someone there for me when I need them. But no matter how wonderful our time as a couple together has been...Emmett, I think I need to end things."

He stared at me silently, and then hurt flickered across his features, but only for a brief moment or two. Then he composed himself, and asked, "Am I allowed to know the reason why?"

I sighed. "Because - and I don't want to sound like some girl who doesn't care about guys' feelings at all - but I'm breaking up with you because I've realized that I'm in love with Paul. I love you, Emmett, but that pales in comparison to the way I feel about Paul...the way I've felt about him all this time. I haven't been lying to you, though - I do love you, just not as much. I made a huge mistake, but we all do, and it's time for me to fix it. I don't know if Paul will take me back, but I do know that I need to end things with you to at least show him that I want us to be back together again. I'm so, so sorry, Emmett - I know I'm hurting you, but it's what's...right."

To my intense surprise, Emmett smiled down at me. "I'm proud of you, Rachel. I love you, too - but your heart belongs to Paul, and for you to realize that and face it...that takes a lot of strength and bravery. And I'm not mad at you - I'm disappointed, sure, that this has to end. But I want you to be happy...whatever that means."

I leaned in and kissed him. "Thank you, Emmett. For everything." And then I wrapped my arms around him for a last embrace before I had to break apart from him.

Somehow, I knew that things would be okay between me and Emmett. I just hoped that they would be okay between me and Paul, too.