The Ties That Bind

Dear Lion,

Well if you have this it pretty much means I'm six feet under. I just wanted to say I was doing this because there was no other way for me to be happy again. I was planning this for a few good months now and finally chose to swallow all that was left in my Mom's stash to finish the job. I don't want you or any of the others to feel bad or miss me--I just simply don't deserve to be missed. I want you all to go on with your lives and have fun. I also wanted you to know that I was sorry for not being able to talk to you. Ever since what happened to me...I just can't and it kills me that I just couldn't trust anyone especially you, because I was in love with you. I have been since you auditioned for the band. I just never wanted to tell you because I know you'd never love me the same way back. I'm truly sorry.

~~~Lesley

And that was it. I was done with editing the letter and set it in the cabinet of the bus, sealed in a white envelope. Knowing eventually one of them would find it.
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"So how did your lesson go with Les?" Martin asked

"It went ok. She had to take a unit test and send it in. It didn't take her too long to finish it and go back to her bunk."

"She's been back there for a while probably sleeping in a bit more." John yawned, "Really wish I was her right now."

"You guys want something to eat?" Martin got out of his seat and walked towards the cabinet

"Yea sure a granola bar." John let out another yawn and stretched out on the couch.

Paul was busy with his eyes glued to the tv screen and Bryan glued to his computer when Martin pulled the envelope out. He cocked an eyebrow and opened it. He only had to scan the first two words to know what it was and screamed darting for my bunk.

"What the fuck Martin?! What's wrong?!" Bryan yelled

He saw the empty bottle of asprin and felt her neck for a pulse. None. He scooped her up and ran to the front.

"We need to stop at the nearest hospital NOW!"

"What's wrong?! Les wake up come on this isn't funny!" Bryan lightly patted Lesley's face

"She has a faint pulse Bryan. She isn't waking up." Martin had tears rolling down his face and they all were panicked. Paul was asking the bus driver to speed up and in less than a minute they were pulled into the ER. Pure luck that they were near one in the city that they had just pulled into.

All four rushed into the wing. The head doctor grabbing her near life less body at an attempt to save her from an untimely death.

"Things aren't looking so good. Was this an accident?" The doctor asked "Did she accidently take to much? It hasn't been the first time a patient was trying to get to sleep and accidently takes too much or a lethal combination of two drugs."

"It--It was a suicide attempt." Martin choked "There was a note and an empty asprin bottle."

Paul put his head in his hands, took a deep breath, and started to weep. Bryan stood stone cold in the corner not wanting to know anymore with John whispering comforting words to him. Bryan was never one to cry but he knew he was on the brink of tears. He just lost his father a short time ago he didn't need to loose his sister too. He loved her to death despite how much they fight and say things to each other that they may not mean.

"She is going to make it. We can't give up on her." He whispered softly

"We're doing the best we can. I will come back to you with more news when the time comes."

"Dr. Monroe we need you NOW." The nurse drag him back into the room.

They worked fiercley at trying to keep her heart pumping. The monitor flat lined and in the momments after were shocked back to it's normal steady pace.

The doctor breathed a sigh of relief. He always had a great sense of weight lifted off of him. Being able to tell a family good news always felt that way. Especially saving a child from the brinks of death. Someone who will now be given a second chance to live life.

"Mr. Donahue, your sister is in recovery she should be fine but as of right now she is sleeping and I'd advise no visitors until tomorrow morning. We will have around the clock servalence to make sure nothing happens to her."

Bryan only nodded and walked out and into the bus with the guys following. He picked the note off the floor and read it.

"It's not even addressed to an imediate family memeber." He muttered

"Who was it addressed to then?" Paul asked in a hushed groan

He shoved the paper into Paul's hands and spoke a harsh

"Congrats."

Paul quickly scanned the note.

"This can't be addressed to me. It's not my name on the header." He wanted it to be wrong but he knew it wasn't. He knew that he was this "lion" she wrote too. "Ever since you audtioned" gave it all away.

" 'Ever since you auditioned..." Paul it is fucking you! Don't be in fucking denial now!" Bryan screamed "I want to get this kid! He is the reason why she is like this and she won't let me get him!"

"We all want to get him Bryan." John rubbed his temples "She is our sister too. But it takes time to get through to someone who has been through something like that."

"Martin-- I know you know something we don't." Bryan turned sharply to him " So tell us."

Martin ran quickly to the back and flipped through Lesley's journal.

"Whatever you need is probably in here. This is where I found the first draft of her letter."

"First?"

"When I helped Les pack I stumbled upon it. I asked her why she even thought about it-- She told me just to be lucky that she didn't go through with it...Who it was addressed too wasn't as clear as this one and she told me it didn't matter anymore when I asked her who she was going to send it too. I trusted her judgment thinking that she wouldn't want to even attempt it."

"You saved her Martin...If you wouldn't have opened the stupid cabinet. I would have went back there early tomorrow morning and find her dead."

Paul couldn't help but scan the note more. He wanted to take away all of her pain. Now when she is more stable and ready to leave to the next city he will comfort her and make her feel safer then she possibly would ever imagine. He could show her that he loves her too.

"Mark Divona. That's him. That's the fucker who did this to her." He slammed the book down " I was friends with his brother when I was in High School."