The Ties That Bind

In a matter of hours I was released from the hospital with Martin dragging me by my wrist. He signed my release forms and picked up my medication then we took our 10 second walk onto the bus. The first person to greet me was John who locked me in a tight bear hug.

"Don't ever do that to us again!" He muffled into my hair

Bryan stayed to the side surfing the net. I guess he didn't want to say anything he would regret so he played it off as if I wasn't even there. I made my way back to my bunk and opened the curtain finding Paul sleeping there.

"You can lay down next to me." He mummbled softly

"I don't think I should."

He scooched over a bit and patted the space next to him. I slowly slid in but not as gracefully as I'd planned. I banged my head hard on the top and tumbled into the bed with a loud clunk.

Paul's warm hand made it to the welt slowly forming on my head.

"Are you ok?" He whispered

I nodded and groaned.

He kissed my forehead and wrapped his arms around my waist. I liked the feeling a lot. He was so warm. I felt calm and relaxed, slowly lowering my head into his chest.

"You scared us Les..." His voice was hoarse "Why did you adress it to me?"

My breathing became more shallow.

"You already know why I did."

His other hand traced my hip lightly. Normally I would have flinched. I always had when anyone had tried to touch me like that since...well what had happened. I felt the callus' on his fingers that probably happened due to playing his guitar.

"I want...I want to hear you say it."

I still felt numb from being drugged up but it still didn't make what I did next any less uncalled for.

I guided his hand higher on my body and slide down on his chest pressing us, if it was even possible, closer together. I leaned my head down my lips pressing softly against his ear and whispered faintly in his ear.

"I love you" I felt his heart patter faster after I had said it.

"I don't think we should be in this position..." he trailed off.

I played with his hair looking at him, dazed.

"I didn't want to hurt any of you. I just thought it was better off that way."

"Don't do it to me again. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"He took my virginity."

"Les.."

"I begged him to stop...he just kept going."

Tears streaked my face. He brought hid hand up and cupped my face, wipping the droplets away with his thumb.

"I won't let him hurt you Les. I love you too."

"Please....stay here tonight."

He wrapped his arms around my waist and I layed down on top of him. Slowly drifting into a deep sleep.