Different
Chapter 36
CHAPTER 36
~INDIGO~
“Josie....”I mumbled, suddenly not knowing what to say.
She stared at me biting her lip, her eyes red-rimmed from crying and her face paper-white.
“I-indigo I-I...”
Her face screwed up and she looked in pain.
What was she going to say? That she hated me? Because it was all my fault? I felt like I was going to cry...
“I-I’m...I’m so, so sorry!!” she gasped.
I blinked at her.
“I’ve been s-such a b-bitch to you! A-and I-I...you never did anything to m-me!” she began to cry.
The nurse looked at us.
Quietly she pointed to a spare room kindly, so that we wouldn’t disturb the other patients.
Shakily, I thanked her and led Josie into it, waving a nervous goodbye to Frankie.
“W-when we came here I didn’t want to be the freak again...we had always been teased and bullied and I was sick of it! I wanted a fresh start where people would l-like m-me and I would have...Friends” Josie began, spitting out the last word like venom.
My eyes wide, she continued,
“I thought that if I was like them, then I’d be happy! So I started dressing like them...and talking like them...and...and...” She trailed off and stared fearfully at me, “I...I thought if they were bitches to you...I’d have to be too...”
I turned away, not wanting her to see the ears prickling in my eyes.
But now something inside me was angry. Pushing the tears out my eyes furiously, I willed strength to come to me, and turned back round to face her.
I tried to shout my words but they came out so quietly that I surprised even myself, my voice breaking and unclear, but she heard me.
“What did I ever do to you? All I ever was was nice to you but then it all changed didn’t it? Shit got sour and Mrs Popular decided that treating me like shit was the best way to become buddies with all of the jocks and tarts! Why didn’t you care Josie? Because you’re too FAKE to care that’s why!”
My words must have stung, but she simply looked at me, and half-smiled
“You’re right there, Indigo.” She said quietly.
Suddenly I wasn’t so sure of myself.
Should I have said those things?
But you know what? I didn’t care. Because I wasn’t finished yet...
I couldn’t help it...all the hurt and fear and anger that had been building up inside me ever since Josie had become like them came spilling out. The feelings I had bottled up, pushed down, hidden because I knew what happened when I showed I had feelings.
They could hurt me.
They could get to me.
And I never wanted to let that happen.
But right now? I wasn’t afraid to show emotion. Because I needed to get out of my system, all the hurt she had caused me.
And when, finally I was finished, Josie looked at me. Not with hatred but with sadness, hurt and...Love.(Writers note: NOT pervy love! Sisterly love! Just wanted to clear that up! ;) )
“Indy...I...I never meant to hurt you...! I’ so sorry! I’m so sorry!”
I looked at her and I remembered all the times she had been called a slut. Treated like dirt. Being beaten up by Jake...for sticking up for me.
How could I have thought that it was just me going through pain?
“I’m sorry too!” I suddenly choked, tears coming dribbling down my porcelain cheeks.
She ran to me and hugged me, and both of us crying now.
“But you know what this means?” Josie smiled through her tears, “I finally can be my self again. No more pretending. I can wear the clothes I want to wear, listen to the music I want to listen to.”
I looked at her and saw how happy she was.
I felt so reassured.
“You’re free...” I whispered to her
~FRANKIE~
I sat outside in the waiting room on my own, waiting for Indigo and her sister to come out. They had been in there for more than an hour. I hoped things were going okay...
Most visitors had gone home now, and I was the only one left in the waiting room.
I was about to close my eyes for a while when the door creaked open.
“Frankie! You’re still here!” Indigo cried, running to me. Her face was freshly tear-stained, but she looked the happiest I’d seen her in a while.
I cleared my throat. Shouldn’t I have waited? Was I too obsessive over her? What if I’d done something wrong?!
“Thank you so much!” She breathed and hugged me. Relieved, I hugged her back, not being able to help myself breathing in her sweet scent.
Indigo’s sister was standing nervously, a bit away from us.
Indigo looked at me worriedly.
“Everything’s okay now!” she mouthed at me.
I stepped forward to Josie, smiling.
“Hey I’m Frankie, Indigo’s Boy- erm...Indigo’s friend”
Shit! I almost called myself her Boyfriend! What the hell was I thinking!
You’re just friends Frankie, JUST FRIENDS.
The girl looked relieved.
“I’m Josie, Indigo’s sister” she smiled, “Look, I...I’m going to go for a walk now...Indigo I’ll meet you at home, Frankie it was nice meeting you!” she smiled at us.
“Okay!” Indigo smiled, as Josie began to pick her way along the white walled corridors.
“Thanks Frankie!” She beamed at me, her eyes gleaming with joy.
“No problem” I grinned back, “Speaking of which....why don’t we go for a walk of our own...?” and I took her hand gently in mine...
~INDIGO~
“Josie....”I mumbled, suddenly not knowing what to say.
She stared at me biting her lip, her eyes red-rimmed from crying and her face paper-white.
“I-indigo I-I...”
Her face screwed up and she looked in pain.
What was she going to say? That she hated me? Because it was all my fault? I felt like I was going to cry...
“I-I’m...I’m so, so sorry!!” she gasped.
I blinked at her.
“I’ve been s-such a b-bitch to you! A-and I-I...you never did anything to m-me!” she began to cry.
The nurse looked at us.
Quietly she pointed to a spare room kindly, so that we wouldn’t disturb the other patients.
Shakily, I thanked her and led Josie into it, waving a nervous goodbye to Frankie.
“W-when we came here I didn’t want to be the freak again...we had always been teased and bullied and I was sick of it! I wanted a fresh start where people would l-like m-me and I would have...Friends” Josie began, spitting out the last word like venom.
My eyes wide, she continued,
“I thought that if I was like them, then I’d be happy! So I started dressing like them...and talking like them...and...and...” She trailed off and stared fearfully at me, “I...I thought if they were bitches to you...I’d have to be too...”
I turned away, not wanting her to see the ears prickling in my eyes.
But now something inside me was angry. Pushing the tears out my eyes furiously, I willed strength to come to me, and turned back round to face her.
I tried to shout my words but they came out so quietly that I surprised even myself, my voice breaking and unclear, but she heard me.
“What did I ever do to you? All I ever was was nice to you but then it all changed didn’t it? Shit got sour and Mrs Popular decided that treating me like shit was the best way to become buddies with all of the jocks and tarts! Why didn’t you care Josie? Because you’re too FAKE to care that’s why!”
My words must have stung, but she simply looked at me, and half-smiled
“You’re right there, Indigo.” She said quietly.
Suddenly I wasn’t so sure of myself.
Should I have said those things?
But you know what? I didn’t care. Because I wasn’t finished yet...
I couldn’t help it...all the hurt and fear and anger that had been building up inside me ever since Josie had become like them came spilling out. The feelings I had bottled up, pushed down, hidden because I knew what happened when I showed I had feelings.
They could hurt me.
They could get to me.
And I never wanted to let that happen.
But right now? I wasn’t afraid to show emotion. Because I needed to get out of my system, all the hurt she had caused me.
And when, finally I was finished, Josie looked at me. Not with hatred but with sadness, hurt and...Love.(Writers note: NOT pervy love! Sisterly love! Just wanted to clear that up! ;) )
“Indy...I...I never meant to hurt you...! I’ so sorry! I’m so sorry!”
I looked at her and I remembered all the times she had been called a slut. Treated like dirt. Being beaten up by Jake...for sticking up for me.
How could I have thought that it was just me going through pain?
“I’m sorry too!” I suddenly choked, tears coming dribbling down my porcelain cheeks.
She ran to me and hugged me, and both of us crying now.
“But you know what this means?” Josie smiled through her tears, “I finally can be my self again. No more pretending. I can wear the clothes I want to wear, listen to the music I want to listen to.”
I looked at her and saw how happy she was.
I felt so reassured.
“You’re free...” I whispered to her
~FRANKIE~
I sat outside in the waiting room on my own, waiting for Indigo and her sister to come out. They had been in there for more than an hour. I hoped things were going okay...
Most visitors had gone home now, and I was the only one left in the waiting room.
I was about to close my eyes for a while when the door creaked open.
“Frankie! You’re still here!” Indigo cried, running to me. Her face was freshly tear-stained, but she looked the happiest I’d seen her in a while.
I cleared my throat. Shouldn’t I have waited? Was I too obsessive over her? What if I’d done something wrong?!
“Thank you so much!” She breathed and hugged me. Relieved, I hugged her back, not being able to help myself breathing in her sweet scent.
Indigo’s sister was standing nervously, a bit away from us.
Indigo looked at me worriedly.
“Everything’s okay now!” she mouthed at me.
I stepped forward to Josie, smiling.
“Hey I’m Frankie, Indigo’s Boy- erm...Indigo’s friend”
Shit! I almost called myself her Boyfriend! What the hell was I thinking!
You’re just friends Frankie, JUST FRIENDS.
The girl looked relieved.
“I’m Josie, Indigo’s sister” she smiled, “Look, I...I’m going to go for a walk now...Indigo I’ll meet you at home, Frankie it was nice meeting you!” she smiled at us.
“Okay!” Indigo smiled, as Josie began to pick her way along the white walled corridors.
“Thanks Frankie!” She beamed at me, her eyes gleaming with joy.
“No problem” I grinned back, “Speaking of which....why don’t we go for a walk of our own...?” and I took her hand gently in mine...