It's Complicated

“Paine, I’m so bored,” I whined, throwing popcorn up to catch it in my mouth.

Paine lied on his stomach, staring up at the ceiling of my living room. Sighing, he turns on his side to face me and smirks, “Go download some porn. That should entertain you.”

I hollered with laughter. “Shut up you perv.”

He shrugged his shoulders. “Just saying.”

“Stupid Amy…she’s ruining our guy time,” I pout, crossing my arms over my chest and glaring at the popcorn lying on my stomach.

Paine nods in agreement. “Women, they’re useless.”

“Some are.”

“Most.”

I laugh, “You’re never getting a girl.”

“Fine with me they’re expensive.”

I roll my eyes at the boy who I swear is going to get his ass kicked by a girl one day before grabbing my empty bowl and standing up. I moved into the kitchen to clean the bowl before returning to the living room to find Paine turning on Guitar Hero.

“You’re addicted to this game,” I tease, kicking him in the side.

He ignored me as he turned it on and immediately began to jam out on the guitar. He mouthed the music while playing the guitar. I think he’s going to do something with music when he gets older, because it’s the only thing he can concentrate on without getting pissed off.

I watched him for hours before calling Ronnie. When he answered I felt myself immediately smile, something he was just able to get me to do. I managed to talk him into coming over and ditching Amy.

“Ronnie is coming over.”

Paine nods and goes back to concentrating on his game. Not even ten minutes after I got off the phone with Ronnie he was knocking on the door. I bolted to the door but stopped before opening it. Doing something an obsessed teenage girl does, I stop, fix my hair, and try to make myself look a little better before opening the door and acting as if I wasn’t head over heels for the brunette in front of me.

“Hey Ronnie!” I jump at him, both my arms wrapping around his neck and squeezing him close to me.

“Hello,” he greets me and hugs me just as tightly before letting go and moving inside. He laughed as soon as he saw Paine playing the normal. “Man, you play that so fucking much you’ve become a God.”

“What are you talking about? I’ve always been a God. It comes naturally,” Paine joked, acing yet another song. I swear this kid has beaten everything on this game. I don’t see why he continues to play it…wouldn’t it get boring after a while?

Apparently not.

Ronnie stayed over for a while, but sadly he had to leave early because of that leech,Amy. I frowned as I sat next to Paine. The boy chuckled softly and threw a comforting arm around my shoulder while squeezing gently. “Love sucks huh?”

“It does!” I cry, kicking my feet childishly. “I hate life.”

“No you don’t,” Paine sighs. “You just hate Amy for keeping Ronnie straight.”

“I guess…I feel better anyways when I blame her.”

“I knew you would,” Paine laughs before pinching my cheek. “Now be a good bitch and go cook me food.”

“I am not a bitch! But food sounds good.”

~

It sucks really. This whole, being in love with my best straight friend, just really blows. Sometimes I wonder how and why I even deal with it. Sometimes I wonder why I just don’t move on, but when I see his smile, hear his laugh, and feel the way my heart rate accelerates when he’s around I remember why…

Still, times like these, when I see them kissing, when I hear them whisper sweet words to each other, I feel my insides twist and turn in painful ways. I just want to run over there and prove that Amy would never care for Ronnie like I did, but I didn’t want to risk losing him so…

I turned away and acted as if I didn’t see that, as if it didn’t hurt me more than a knife to my chest. I moved along to Paine who was at the end of the hall, waiting for me, and already knowing what the problem was.

He handed me a Reese Cup and I grinned. “I think you can see the future.”

“I told you two yesterday, I’m a God,” Paine joked, nudging my arm and forcing me to show him the small smile on my face. “Now that’s what I like to see…come on.”

“What do you think I should do Paine?” I question, taking my seat next to the boy. Looking at him, I feel the smile slip away and turn into a frown. I never was able to smile when talking about this.

“Do about what?” He asks. “About his bitch of a girlfriend?”

I nod.

“What do you feel you should do?”

That’s what I couldn’t decide. I felt like I should tell him that the girl wasn’t as “in love” with him as she claims she was, but at the same time I didn’t want to. I was scared of might what happen and how he would feel. She made him smile and seeing him smile was the best thing in the world. I didn’t want to ruin it…but at the same time…

I’m his best friend…shouldn’t I tell him about this?

Sighing, I shrug my shoulders and answer, “This is too complicated for me.”

“That’s why I don’t think about it.”

I rolled my eyes at him before saying, “Lets just…change the subject.”

“I heard Mrs. Marcus fart yesterday.”

“That was random.”

“But it changed the subject.”