Sink Into Me

I practically shoved my face back into the magazine as I scrunched my face up in frustration.

Damnit.

I sighed as I realised how stupid I was being and pulled the magazine away from my face and placed it beside me as I looked back up to see Adam walking towards me hesitantly. I really didn’t want to do this right now, the whole point of “clear your head” isn’t to be faced with your problems, it‘s to overcome them, and mine was walking right towards me.

Adam stood awkwardly in front of me, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Uhm..hi.” he mumbled.

“Hi.” I bluntly said.

“I just wanted to talk” He said as he avoided eye contact with me.

“Talk away” I muttered.

“Look Taylor, there’s no point me talking if you’re not going to listen, so can I at least sit down?” He sighed.

I looked at him, then at the seat next to me and sighed, moving the magazine.

“Thanks” He mumbled as he sat down next to me.

I continued to stare in front of me, trying to ignore the fact that I’d allowed Adam to sit next to me.

“Taylor! Can you at least look at me?!” He screeched.

I sighed and rolled my eyes as I turned to face him.

“What do you want Adam?” I sighed.

This was killing me.

“I just wanted to apologise, properly” He mumbled.

“Why are you even bothering, though? I mean, you tell me you hate me all the time, it’s not like it’s a new thing, is it?”

“Oh come on Taylor, even you’re not that stupid, like I mean it!”

“Well you sure did earlier” I scoffed.

He rolled his eyes as he pushed his hair out of his face.

“Look Taylor, I don’t hate you, okay?” He sighed.

“Well you have a nice way of showing it”

I know I was being a bitch and that he’d didn’t deserve it, but what he said hurt.

“Taylor would you just give it a rest?! I don’t know what I’m still doing here” He scoffed as he got up.

My hand automatically shot out for his arm before I could stop it. I didn’t know how it happened, but I sure as hell didn’t like it.

“I’m sorry” I sighed as I let go of his wrist awkwardly.

“For what? Being a bitch or grabbing me?” He raised an eyebrow.

“For being a bitch” I replied.

He sat back down and looked at me, a shocked expression playing on his face.

“What?” I shrugged.

“You play everything off like it’s nothing” he sighed as he shook his head.

“So?”

“You really shouldn’t, you miss everything” he mumbled.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing, it doesn’t mean anything.”

“Right” I scoffed as I got up and walked towards the revolving doors.

“What the fuck, Taylor?! Where are you going?!” He shouted.

I didn’t answer as I stepped in the doors.

“Away, away from you. You’re killing me” I mumbled to myself as I stepped outside into the cool air.

I moved and leant against the wall of the hotel and tilted my head up to look at the sky, letting a tear fall, not bothering to wipe it away.

As someone stepped out of the doors I turned my head, automatically turning it back away and wiping the tear away at the speed of light.
Adam sighed and walked over to me, stopping directly in front of me.

“Stop running away, Taylor” He scowled.

I brought my eyes down slightly to meet his and shrugged.

“There’s nothing wrong with running” I mumbled.

“Stop being so damn defensive!”

“Then stop trying to break down my walls!” I shouted, turning my head away.

He looked taken aback for a minute then regained himself, coughing awkwardly.

“Taylor” he said as he placed a finger under my chin, moving it so that I’d face him directly “I’ve already broken down your walls”

I pushed his hand away and glared at him with all the force I could muster. He sighed and leant in and whispered in my ear; “I really am sorry, for everything” he moved back and pushed my hair out of my face gently and walked away.

As I saw his retreating figure walk back into the hotel I let out a shaky sigh. He was right. He had broken down my walls, but he’d done something else too, he’d managed to break down the walls around my heart no matter how much I tried to pretend otherwise.