How A Heart Breaks

“You know…it’s such a turn on when you’re angry.”

Pash grunts in response and I chuckle. Running my hand up his thigh definitely catches his attention and he looks at me with wide, surprised eyes. I grin and pinch him. He yelps and punches me in the chest but whenever I press a lingering kiss to his lips, I’m forgiven immediately.

“I’m being serious here. God, you’re just so fuckin’ hot when you’re angry!” I squeal, probably like a girl but I don’t care because damn it, it got the point across. “Only when it’s at other people though…”

Pash scoffs, “Asshole, you all should have let me kick the shit out of him.”

“I didn’t want to see Porter get a boner,” Nathan laughs from the drivers seat.

“Hey!” I cry, waving my arms around wildly. “I would so not get a boner! And even if I did, Pash would get rid of it, right baby?”

Pash sputters some type of incoherency and I cackle along with everyone else in the bus. I grab his arm and throw it over my shoulders. He stares at me with a what the fuck expression but I shrug it off and curl into his side with my arms around his waist.

I rest my head against his chest and smile at the sound of his heart beat. It’s speeding up just like my own and that brings a smile to my face, knowing that Pash gets as worked up around me as I do him. It’s nice to know that we both really do share the same feelings and I hope it always stays that way because Pash and I…

I don’t know, we just fit. We’re like cookies and milk, peanut butter and jelly, penis and vagina! Yeah, we just go good together and I can’t really see myself in a serious relationship with anyone else. I wonder if Pash thinks the same way. Does he ever imagine himself with someone other than me?

He better not or so help me I will beat his ass.

“Are we staying at a hotel tonight?” Hayden asks while chewing away at his nails. Julian is already fast asleep in the back seat and Nathan is staring at the road.

“Yeah and after the show tomorrow we are driving straight home so we’re going to take shifts, ok?” Nathan orders, looking into the rear view mirror to glance at Pash and I. We both nod and wave him away as he grins and goes to talking with Hayden.

Nathan pulls into the motel parking lot and we all get out to get our room keys. Like last time Pash and I get our own room and I skip off to the door where I kick it open and go inside with Pash right behind me. Groaning, I fall onto the bed. “Comfy…”

“Go take a shower, you smell like B.O.”

“Hey!” I shout, turning over to glare up at Pash who is standing before me with a smirk. He moves towards me and situates himself between my legs. Pouting, I cross my arms and turn away so whenever he goes to kiss me, he hits my cheek. “No, I’m angry with you. Get the fuck out. You’re sleeping on the couch.”

“Porter…there is no couch.”

“…sleep on the floor.”

Pash rolls his eyes and stands up, grabbing me and pulling me along with him to the shower. There we both strip down and step in. I’m not really sure why we’re showering together. I mean we didn’t even do anything while in there but it felt…nice.

I smile afterwards and curl into Pash’s side when lying in bed. His fingers rub at my side and I ask, “Are you excited to go home?”

“I was just there, don’t you remember?”

I pout and look up at him. “Yeah, but this time we’ll all be going home together. That changes things!”

With a roll of his eyes, he sighs but looks down at me with a smile. “Yeah, I think we all need a break.”

Nodding in agreement, I release a drawn out yawn. My eyes feel heavy as I sigh and rest my head on Pash’s chest. The warmth radiating off his skin and onto my own is only making me that much more tired. My eyes flutter shut and without my permission, I fall into a deep slumber…

“All right guys, this is our last song! I’d like to thank you all for coming out to see us. This tour was friggin’ insane and we all can’t wait until next year to rock out with you some more. So let me hear you screaming your mother fucking lungs out!”

The entire crowd cheers, pounding their fists into the air the moment Julian starts the beat with the guys soon following with their riffs. Jumping up and down, I start to sing and make sure to give it my all, like I do every time. And once we’re all sweaty and smell like shit, the show comes to an end, the crowd cheers and screams things I don’t understand as the guys and I walk off stage, me smiling and waving wildly until they’re out of sight.

Back stage, I jump onto Pash’s shirtless back. He grunts as I laugh and wrap my arms around his neck and legs around his waist. “Get the fuck off, it’s too hot for this shit.”

“Pash,” I whine, poking at his neck as I hop off his back. I run in front of him and stare angrily at his nearly bare neck. “It’s almost gone.”

“What is?” He stares at me like I’m stupid.

“The hickey…I need to give you a new one, come here!” I throw my arms around him and I was so friggin’ close but of course the asshole had to shove me away. “Pash! Come on, that hickey needs to be there for forever and eternity!”

“Get the fuck out,” he shouts, shoving me away one push after another. Crossing my arms, I whine and stomp back to the bus where I open the passenger door and leave it open as I sit in the seat drinking from my water. What a butthead…all I wanted to do was give him some lovin’. What kind of man is he, denying me like that!

“Who’s driving first?” Julian asks after we’ve managed to talk with fans and pack up all our things. Stretching, I let out a yawn and shake my head because I honestly feel too tired to drive. Pash is the same and we both go into the very back seat where he lies on his back and I place myself comfortably on top of him.

With a soft ‘umph’ Pash looks at me quizzically. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Giving you that hickey back,” I reply, running my lips over his pulse. Pash panics and tries to push me away but quickly I bite into the flesh and run over it with my tongue in apology. Pash grunts and tries to push me off but I grab his hands and pin them above him as I work my magic on his neck and once I’m satisfied I pull away with a soft ‘pop’ and admire the reddening skin.

“You…little shit,” Pash bites, glaring up at me but I can see that he enjoyed it but the way his eyes twinkled slightly.

I cackle. “You love me.”

He rolls his eyes. “Shut up.” And tugs me down onto his chest. I smile and curl into him as he wishes me a good nights rest before pressing a soft kiss to my forehead.

Yeah…this is the life…