I Love the Way That She Breathes
The Good and The Lies
I woke up to someone knocking at my door. I rubbed my eyes and pulled my hair into a messy bun, knowing it was a mess. I prayed that it wasn't the cops telling me that Ronnie was dead or arrested. I opened the door and saw Ronnie, looking worse than usual and tears in his eyes.
"What?" I asked.
I was a little bitter toward him because since that day in November, I've seen Ronnie twice. Once I was at a club with some friends and he was there. They just knew him as Ronnie from Escape The Fate, they didn't know he was my boyfriend. He and I ended up having sex in the bathroom. Another time he showed up at the apartment and one of my friends were there. We had sex again while she was watching a movie in the living room.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, "I know it's late--"
"Two in the morning, Ronnie."
He nodded, wiping a hand over his eyes, "I know. And I'm sorry. But I miss you, and I want to stop this. I'm at rock fucking bottom. I have no one. And you've always been there for me. I literally have no one. The guys kicked me out of the band, the house that I paid rent for. I have nowhere to go and I'm so sick of this lifestyle. I need your help, Norah, please."
"How do I know you're serious, Ronnie?" I asked.
He ran a hand through his hair, "Let's go to bed, Norah."
"What, no sex?" I asked, sarcastically.
He shook his head, "Not tonight, Norah."
I looked almost shocked. He always wanted to fuck when he came home.
"Do you wanna take a shower before you go to bed?" I asked.
He nodded as I let him in the apartment. I went back into my bedroom and got back into bed. I listened as the shower cut off. A few minutes later, Ronnie walked out in black basketball shorts and no shirt. He stood at the end of the bed, nervously.
"What's wrong, babe?" I asked.
"Can I sleep here?" he asked, meaning the bed.
I smiled, "Sure."
He slid into the bed, wrapped his arms around my waist, and got under the blanket.
"You have work tomorrow?" he asked quietly.
"Yeah."
I felt his lips on my neck, "Is it okay if I hang out here while you're at work? I'll cook dinner for you tomorrow night and we can just chill."
I felt my eyes water, "Um, sure, Ronnie."
I felt him smile on the back of my neck.
"I love you, Norah," he whispered.
I said it back, a knot in my stomach. I didn't know if he would still be here in the morning.
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My alarm blared at 6:30 the next morning. I sat up and I was alone. I rolled my eyes. I knew it was too good to be true. I went into the bathroom to do my business. I came out and saw Ronnie shutting the sliding glass door to the balcony. I looked at him, shocked.
"You're still here?" I asked.
He nodded, rubbing his eyes, "Yeah, your alarm woke me up. Interestingly enough, it was one of my songs, so I woke me up."
I smiled and shook my head, "Where were you?"
He pointed at the balcony, "Cigarette."
I nodded, "I need to get in the shower. Are you still gonna cook for me?"
He smiled, "Yes I am, baby. Go get ready, I'll have breakfast ready for you."
I grinned and kissed him. He smiled against my lips and slapped my ass.
"Go get ready, beautiful," he said.
I grabbed a white dress and a black vest, a pair of boy shorts and a bra. I took a quick shower and turned my straightener on. I pulled on all my clothes and dried my hair. I straightened it before putting my bangs in a little bump, pinning them back, and putting the rest of my hair in a low ponytail. Next I put my eyeliner and eyeshadow on.
"Babe!" Ronnie called.
I put my lip gloss on and turned the straightener off, "Yeah?"
"Food's ready!"
I smiled, "Okay, I'll be down in a minute, baby!"
I turned the light off in the bathroom and grabbed a pair of black ankle heel boots. I slid them on my feet and grabbed my iPhone and my purse, which already had my stuff in it. I turned the light off and walked into the kitchen. Ronnie turned around and smirked.
"You look hot, babe."
I smiled, "I look like this everyday, babe."
He grinned wolfishly. I just laughed and shook my head. I put my purse on the counter and sat down at the table, next to Ronnie.
"Thank you, Ronnie. This smells so good," I said, kissing his cheek.
He grinned and kissed my lips. We ate in silence, occasionally saying something. At 7:30, I stood up.
"Babe, I gotta go to work," I said, grabbing my purse.
He stood up, too and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.
"I'll see you when you get home?"
I wrapped my arms around his torso, "I'll be home around five. I'll cook for you, baby, okay?"
He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead, then my lips.
"I love you," he whispered, resting his forehead against mine.
I smiled widely, "I love you."
We kissed again and he started cleaning up and I walked out of my apartment and to my car, smiling.
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At five, I unlocked the door and heard My Chemical Romance blasting from my room. I walked into my room and saw Ronnie writing in a notebook, his head bobbing slightly to the song. I smiled and sat next to him on the bed. He looked up at me and smiled. He turned the music down.
"Hey, baby, how was work?" he asked, putting the notebook down and putting his arm around my shoulder.
I rested my head on his shoulder, "Tiring. I really don't feel like cooking."
"I'll cook, babe," Ronnie offered.
I shook my head, "You cooked this morning. We can just order a pizza," I suggested.
I felt him kiss my head, "Okay."
I took my ankle boots off, and my vest. I stood up and went to my closet, grabbing a v-neck 'Exist' shirt and a pair of soffee shorts. Ronnie was on his phone, ordering a pizza. He hung up and opened his arms. I sat on his lap and wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around me and ran his hands through my hair.
"I missed you," he whispered.
I kissed his neck, "What are we gonna do, babe?"
"About what?"
"The drugs, Ronnie."
He sighed, "I want to stop, but I don't know if I can."
I nodded, "Well, do you want to go to rehab?"
He was quiet for a minute, "I want to try doing it here, so I can be with you."
I shook my head, "Ronnie, you need to work on you. You can't be concerned about me, you know?"
He kissed me, "We'll figure it out."
I nodded as the doorbell rang. I grabbed my purse and got off his lap. I took my wallet out of my purse and walked toward the door. I felt Ronnie grab my waist.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
I giggled and continued walking toward the door, "Paying. I was supposed to cook dinner, but I was too tired. Therefore, I'll pay for the pizza."
He growled and bit my neck, then let me go to the door as he went to the kitchen. I paid for the pizza and walked into the kitchen.
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"Come on, babe, let's go to bed," I said.
He stood up from the couch and wrapped his arms around me. We walked to our room and lied down.
"I love you," he whispered.
I smiled and repeated it. I felt him kiss my neck a few times. I pulled his lips to mine and kissed him hard.
"Good night, baby," I whispered.
I felt him smile, "Good night."
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I woke up when I felt Ronnie getting out of bed.
"Babe?" I called, "Where are you going?"
He looked a little mad, "Someone's here to talk to me, I'll be right back."
I nodded and got up, "I'm gonna go make some coffee."
He nodded and walked toward the door. I started to make the coffee as he walked out the door. I heard a lot of shouting and got concerned. I walked outside and saw Ronnie in handcuffs with about 10 undercover cops and a girl standing there.
"What is going on?!" I screamed, "Ronnie?"
"This is fucking bullshit!" he yelled, "What the fuck!"
"Ronnie!"
"Shut the fuck up, Norah! That cunt set me the fuck up!" he yelled, nodding his head toward the girl.
I gave her a dirty look. She looked at me for sympathy. I growled.
"Fucking shit, Norah, you fucking did this, didn't you?!" he screamed as he was being dragged away.
"Ronnie! Why the fuck would I do that?!" I screamed back.
"Fuck you, you did it!" he shouted.
I felt tears come to my eyes as he continued screaming that he thinks I set this up. I collapsed on the ground, crying. One of the undercover cops came up to me.
"Ma'am, did you know he was selling out of your apartment?" he asked.
I shook my head, "He's only been home since yesterday."
"Someone called us and said that they knew Ronnie was here and was selling. She was in our custody and we knew she had ties to him. We offered to let her go to get us Ronnie, who's been running from the law for some time."
I nodded, "Can you tell me who called?"
He sighed, "I'm can't, honey, I'm sorry."
I stood up, "Okay. Um, thanks, I guess."
He shook my hand and I went back inside, curled back into bed and cried.
"What?" I asked.
I was a little bitter toward him because since that day in November, I've seen Ronnie twice. Once I was at a club with some friends and he was there. They just knew him as Ronnie from Escape The Fate, they didn't know he was my boyfriend. He and I ended up having sex in the bathroom. Another time he showed up at the apartment and one of my friends were there. We had sex again while she was watching a movie in the living room.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, "I know it's late--"
"Two in the morning, Ronnie."
He nodded, wiping a hand over his eyes, "I know. And I'm sorry. But I miss you, and I want to stop this. I'm at rock fucking bottom. I have no one. And you've always been there for me. I literally have no one. The guys kicked me out of the band, the house that I paid rent for. I have nowhere to go and I'm so sick of this lifestyle. I need your help, Norah, please."
"How do I know you're serious, Ronnie?" I asked.
He ran a hand through his hair, "Let's go to bed, Norah."
"What, no sex?" I asked, sarcastically.
He shook his head, "Not tonight, Norah."
I looked almost shocked. He always wanted to fuck when he came home.
"Do you wanna take a shower before you go to bed?" I asked.
He nodded as I let him in the apartment. I went back into my bedroom and got back into bed. I listened as the shower cut off. A few minutes later, Ronnie walked out in black basketball shorts and no shirt. He stood at the end of the bed, nervously.
"What's wrong, babe?" I asked.
"Can I sleep here?" he asked, meaning the bed.
I smiled, "Sure."
He slid into the bed, wrapped his arms around my waist, and got under the blanket.
"You have work tomorrow?" he asked quietly.
"Yeah."
I felt his lips on my neck, "Is it okay if I hang out here while you're at work? I'll cook dinner for you tomorrow night and we can just chill."
I felt my eyes water, "Um, sure, Ronnie."
I felt him smile on the back of my neck.
"I love you, Norah," he whispered.
I said it back, a knot in my stomach. I didn't know if he would still be here in the morning.
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My alarm blared at 6:30 the next morning. I sat up and I was alone. I rolled my eyes. I knew it was too good to be true. I went into the bathroom to do my business. I came out and saw Ronnie shutting the sliding glass door to the balcony. I looked at him, shocked.
"You're still here?" I asked.
He nodded, rubbing his eyes, "Yeah, your alarm woke me up. Interestingly enough, it was one of my songs, so I woke me up."
I smiled and shook my head, "Where were you?"
He pointed at the balcony, "Cigarette."
I nodded, "I need to get in the shower. Are you still gonna cook for me?"
He smiled, "Yes I am, baby. Go get ready, I'll have breakfast ready for you."
I grinned and kissed him. He smiled against my lips and slapped my ass.
"Go get ready, beautiful," he said.
I grabbed a white dress and a black vest, a pair of boy shorts and a bra. I took a quick shower and turned my straightener on. I pulled on all my clothes and dried my hair. I straightened it before putting my bangs in a little bump, pinning them back, and putting the rest of my hair in a low ponytail. Next I put my eyeliner and eyeshadow on.
"Babe!" Ronnie called.
I put my lip gloss on and turned the straightener off, "Yeah?"
"Food's ready!"
I smiled, "Okay, I'll be down in a minute, baby!"
I turned the light off in the bathroom and grabbed a pair of black ankle heel boots. I slid them on my feet and grabbed my iPhone and my purse, which already had my stuff in it. I turned the light off and walked into the kitchen. Ronnie turned around and smirked.
"You look hot, babe."
I smiled, "I look like this everyday, babe."
He grinned wolfishly. I just laughed and shook my head. I put my purse on the counter and sat down at the table, next to Ronnie.
"Thank you, Ronnie. This smells so good," I said, kissing his cheek.
He grinned and kissed my lips. We ate in silence, occasionally saying something. At 7:30, I stood up.
"Babe, I gotta go to work," I said, grabbing my purse.
He stood up, too and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.
"I'll see you when you get home?"
I wrapped my arms around his torso, "I'll be home around five. I'll cook for you, baby, okay?"
He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead, then my lips.
"I love you," he whispered, resting his forehead against mine.
I smiled widely, "I love you."
We kissed again and he started cleaning up and I walked out of my apartment and to my car, smiling.
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At five, I unlocked the door and heard My Chemical Romance blasting from my room. I walked into my room and saw Ronnie writing in a notebook, his head bobbing slightly to the song. I smiled and sat next to him on the bed. He looked up at me and smiled. He turned the music down.
"Hey, baby, how was work?" he asked, putting the notebook down and putting his arm around my shoulder.
I rested my head on his shoulder, "Tiring. I really don't feel like cooking."
"I'll cook, babe," Ronnie offered.
I shook my head, "You cooked this morning. We can just order a pizza," I suggested.
I felt him kiss my head, "Okay."
I took my ankle boots off, and my vest. I stood up and went to my closet, grabbing a v-neck 'Exist' shirt and a pair of soffee shorts. Ronnie was on his phone, ordering a pizza. He hung up and opened his arms. I sat on his lap and wrapped my arms around his shoulders and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around me and ran his hands through my hair.
"I missed you," he whispered.
I kissed his neck, "What are we gonna do, babe?"
"About what?"
"The drugs, Ronnie."
He sighed, "I want to stop, but I don't know if I can."
I nodded, "Well, do you want to go to rehab?"
He was quiet for a minute, "I want to try doing it here, so I can be with you."
I shook my head, "Ronnie, you need to work on you. You can't be concerned about me, you know?"
He kissed me, "We'll figure it out."
I nodded as the doorbell rang. I grabbed my purse and got off his lap. I took my wallet out of my purse and walked toward the door. I felt Ronnie grab my waist.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
I giggled and continued walking toward the door, "Paying. I was supposed to cook dinner, but I was too tired. Therefore, I'll pay for the pizza."
He growled and bit my neck, then let me go to the door as he went to the kitchen. I paid for the pizza and walked into the kitchen.
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"Come on, babe, let's go to bed," I said.
He stood up from the couch and wrapped his arms around me. We walked to our room and lied down.
"I love you," he whispered.
I smiled and repeated it. I felt him kiss my neck a few times. I pulled his lips to mine and kissed him hard.
"Good night, baby," I whispered.
I felt him smile, "Good night."
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I woke up when I felt Ronnie getting out of bed.
"Babe?" I called, "Where are you going?"
He looked a little mad, "Someone's here to talk to me, I'll be right back."
I nodded and got up, "I'm gonna go make some coffee."
He nodded and walked toward the door. I started to make the coffee as he walked out the door. I heard a lot of shouting and got concerned. I walked outside and saw Ronnie in handcuffs with about 10 undercover cops and a girl standing there.
"What is going on?!" I screamed, "Ronnie?"
"This is fucking bullshit!" he yelled, "What the fuck!"
"Ronnie!"
"Shut the fuck up, Norah! That cunt set me the fuck up!" he yelled, nodding his head toward the girl.
I gave her a dirty look. She looked at me for sympathy. I growled.
"Fucking shit, Norah, you fucking did this, didn't you?!" he screamed as he was being dragged away.
"Ronnie! Why the fuck would I do that?!" I screamed back.
"Fuck you, you did it!" he shouted.
I felt tears come to my eyes as he continued screaming that he thinks I set this up. I collapsed on the ground, crying. One of the undercover cops came up to me.
"Ma'am, did you know he was selling out of your apartment?" he asked.
I shook my head, "He's only been home since yesterday."
"Someone called us and said that they knew Ronnie was here and was selling. She was in our custody and we knew she had ties to him. We offered to let her go to get us Ronnie, who's been running from the law for some time."
I nodded, "Can you tell me who called?"
He sighed, "I'm can't, honey, I'm sorry."
I stood up, "Okay. Um, thanks, I guess."
He shook my hand and I went back inside, curled back into bed and cried.