The Drug Years

Quinton's point of view
====================

Instead of going to lunch I walked around the halls thinking to myself.

I knew that if I kept avoiding her, it would push her away. So I decided to give up. Give up on trying to keep her away from my fucked up life. I knew that once she found out what I was really like, she would run away. And that's what I wanted, wasn't it?

No, I wanted her to be mine.

She wouldn't like me if she knew that I was a drug addict. Someone who got high almost every night. Someone who was kicked out of his house. Someone who was homeless and depended on the kindness of his friends.

I sighed. I needed her ever though we had just met. I don't know what it was. Love at first sight?

No, I never believed in that shit. It sounded so corny, but how else could I explain it?

I still needed to talk to Grace, but I hadn't had the courage to break things off with her. Grace was beautiful. She originally had blond hair, but she dyed it candy apple red. She had pale skin and green eyes.

I first met her at the mall. It was also before my hard core drug days; instead I smoked.

I was in Hot Topic looking at the shirts when a blond haired girl, who didn't look like she belonged in here, walked in. She was wearing a pink summer dress with frill at the bottom and flip flops.

She had dark eye make-up on though and that's what first took my breath away. She was very dark despite her innocent exterior. I found out that she dressed that way to please her parents. Eventually she grew tired of her stereotype looks and dyed her hair. She then swapped dresses for skinny jeans and band tees. I fell even more in love.

Everything about her drew me in. I would have done anything she told me to do, and then she picked up drugs. And so did I. We would get high, party, and fuck. Eventually my parents told me to either break up with her and stop the drugs or leave. But by then I was already addicted to the point where going without them for one day was torture.

She was the kind of girl I would have stayed with forever. The only girl who could truly love someone like me. Then we suddenly started fighting about stupid shit. The last fight we had was the reason I hadn't talked to her in weeks. She pissed me off so bad, yet we still had some connection that I was afraid to sever.

Surely Lacey held more interest to me. There was no doubt about it. I was just connected to Grace in so many ways that it would be hard to break off completely.

But even when I think of Grace, how I thought I loved her, I wonder why I felt the need to cheat on her. Grace didn't go to my school, and no one here knew about her. So I would occasionally pick up another girlfriend to fuck.

I sighed as I sat on the stairs that were hidden in a hallway. What was I going to do?

I sighed again before concluding that I would do nothing about Grace.

At that moment, the bell rang, and I made my way slowly back to class.