Words Only Count If You Mean Them

Chapter 7

“I-I’m ready,” I say, my face serious, no sign that I’m kidding or lying, but I am lying. I just really don’t want to talk about what happened when Jack left, to go pick up the CD. Mostly because I don’t want things to get awkward between them. It was just a kiss on the hand, nothing bad at all. Nothing in America at least… I think… So, I lied. I say I’m ready when I know I won’t be for awhile. I don’t know why I’m not ready and it confuses me. I guess I just don’t want my heartbroken. I just don’t want to give away something so precious, to someone who doesn’t care. Even though I know Jack would never do that.

Now let’s get back to reality:

“Are you sure,” Jack asks, he looks at me questioningly.

I nod, “I’m serious, Jack,” I lie. Jack just gives me another look.

Jack plants his lips on mine and the kiss gets deep very fast. Jack pushes his hips down on mine. I usually push away by now. And I really do, but I don’t. I keep myself preoccupied on making the kiss as passionate as possible. After Jack realizes I’m not protesting, his hands start to play with the hem of my shirt. I smirk, trying to make this as convincing as possible.

He pulls up from the kiss and I frown. “If at any time you want me to stop, tell me,” He says, “I don’t want to hurt you.”

I nod, “Now, if you don’t mind can we continue?” I ask.

He grins, “Of course, but first,” He pulls my shirt off. His cool hands run up and down my stomach. This feels so good.

A moan escapes my lips and Jack starts sucking on my neck, a lot harder then he used to. I can’t help but moan again.

Jack slides off his shirt and discards it somewhere. His hands do down to the buttons of my jeans. He stops, “Speak now or…”

I don’t let him finish, “Just fucking do it. I-I want you inside of me.” Now, this was no lie because in fact I was quiet horny write now. Jack had that sort of effect on me.

“Lex, are you-”

Again I cut him off, “If you don’t do it soon, I’m going to go handle it myself.”

Jack grins a bit, “Now, I’d like to see you do that. I’m kidding Lex, kidding,” he says when he sees my sad expression. “I’ll get back to work,” He grins mischievously.

All of a sudden my jeans fly off and fall to the ground. Jack’s soon follow. Jack slides down my boxers and he strokes my hard cock slowly. I moan, soon his pace gets faster.

“Shit, Jack, just fuck me already.” I stutter out, kind of surprised, I could make a coherent sentence. He doesn’t listen. His tongue goes to my abdomen and begins making circles with his tongue. I go to move my hands, but find Jack’s holding them over my head. I try to wiggle my hands out of his grip, but to no avail. “Jack-k, p-pleease.”

“Please what?” He asks.

“Please fuck me.”

He grins, getting up and grabs some things from his nightstand. He picks up my hips and positions me. “Lex, this may hurt, but I have to stretch you before I do anything else.”

I nod. The whole fact that the sex would hurt like a bitch, if you didn’t do it right, was another reason, I wasn’t ready. I was never good at handling pain. At least from what I heard, it could be quite painful. And no, I did not read this off of a website… My mom informed me…

He opens the bottle and rubs some lube on his finger. “Ready, Lex?” I shake my head ‘yes.’ And he inserts one finger. His finger pushes through the thick ring of muscles. I squirm a bit, it hurts a bit but, it feels… weird. “Lex, is it okay if I add another?” I nod my head. He adds another finger and his fingers start scissoring, stretching me open. When Jack adds a third finger he doesn’t warn me.

I bite down on my lip; I wasn’t ready for that one yet. Jack seems to sense this too, “Sorry.” He mumbles. He stretches me a bit more, before he pulls his fingers out. He puts the condom on and a bit of lube. “Ready,” He asks, checking to makes sure he doesn’t hurt me.

I nod and think inwardly, Ready as I’ll be for a while. He slides in and I close my eyes tightly. Now I understand that THIS was the painful part. I could feel the tears start to form.

“Its okay, Lex, it gets better,” He coos in my ear. He starts kissing my neck, trying to distract my mind from the pain. A bit later the pain subsides enough.

“Okay,” I mumble. Jack begins moving in and out in a slow motion, picking up speed. He slams his dick in and a moan escapes my lip, as he repeatedly hits my prostate. “Ugh… Jack s-so good. Um, Jack,” I blush. I don’t even need to say anything, next thing I know, Jack’s hands around my dick, jacking me off.

Jack’s lips attack mine, every touch feels so amazing. And I can feel myself getting close. I come a moment later, being filled with pleasure. Jack soon follows; he pulls out and throws the used condom in the garbage.

He pulls me close, or at least attempts to. I pull away and sit up. I can’t look at him. I don’t feel right.

“Lex, what’s the matter?”

I don’t answer. I wasn’t ready and now it’s too late. I find my clothes and throw them on. I grab my phone. “J-jack,” I say my voice small, “I-I’m gonna go,” I run out the door.

“Fuck, he wasn’t ready,” I hear Jack whisper, from outside his door. I sprint out of his house, down the street, turn many corners, reach my house, and go up to my room.

My phone’s vibrating and playing Jack’s ring tone. I ignore it and go take a shower. I scrub my skin, a little harder then necessary. I throw on some pajamas; turn off my still ringing phone and go to sleep.

I couldn’t deal with this now, I needed sleep. And as much as I hate to admit it, I needed my mom. She’d know what I was feeling.