Look At What I Deal With

I woke up to the sound of my door open and then close. The shadow loomed near the door and slowly descended to my bed. I was so tired it was hard to keep my eyes open with out drifting away. The figure sat by my side but I couldn't make out the face.

"Katherine?"

I tried to whisper but nothing came out.The smell of vanilla drifted around me and I knew it was Leo. His hand touched my face gently as he stroked my cheek.

"Shh."

"Who let you in? Why are you here?"

I slowly rose holding myself up with one arm. I looked over at the time and it was three twenty six. It was pitch black in my room.

"Em."

His voice quivered. He didn't sound right.

"What's wrong?"

"Emily..." He sniffed. "I don't know why I did it."

"Kiss Rosemarie?"

"No. I did more than that."

My heart rose to my chest. What in the world was he talking about? How did he even get in here? Where was Kate and Katherine? I felt Leo hands grab onto mine. He was trembling. What was going on with him?

"Wha- what did you do?"

He hesitated. What could have been so bad?

"I- I hurt him."

"Hurt who?"

"Robert."

"What did you do to him?"

I felt his tears drop onto my skin. His shoulders began to shake. He buried his head into my collar bone, pulling me into a hug. What in the world did he do. Leo never cried. What could be so severe that he would weep?

"You know why I moved here? My mom and I use to live in Texas. Things got real bad when my dad left you know. My mom cried every night and I went out to get drunk or get high on what ever I could get my hands on. When I got home every night me and my mom got into fights. Some with words and some with physical force. it happens when I get mad. I can't control it. It got worse over time. Even when I wasn't under the influence I would go into these fits. I would trash the house. It got so bad that I pushed my mom and she fell into the glass table hitting her head that she went into coma for five days."

"My mom moved us here thinking things would be different and they were. Until today. I thought I had my anger under control. I took all my classes and everything but when I saw Robert kiss you that feeling came back. When you went inside I waited and then I went to his house and sure enough he was there. I got out and we began to argue. It got to the point were we began to fight and then it could have been over if I just took one more blow to his head.I could have killed him. But I stopped. I left him bleeding from his mouth but other than that he was fine. I thought this was over I really did. Emily...

"It's like history repeating itself.In Texas I loved this girl named Rose and we dated for three years. Everything seemed good until she cheated on me with my best friend Chase. I put him in the hospital for three weeks. Even after that Chase was still my friend. I was heart broken and I didn't want it to happen again. But then you came along. I thought nothing would happened if I got close but it did. I recognized the feeling that I thought I had for Rose but with you it's different. You are different Emily. "

Leo was trembling so hard he was shaking me in my arms. Tears kept coming down his face.

He fell into silence. I stroked his hair while he tried to gather himself up. It didn't work. He tried to swallow back his tears but they keep coming.

"Leo."

I pulled him away and I could she his face faintly.

"It's OK. It's OK."

I didn't know if they would be but this was all I could really say to him. I was scared myself. I didn't know what I could possibly do. I was scared for Robert and him. I thought Leo was fine nothing seemed to seem out of place. Leo was always strong. Never once did he seem down or out of control. He seemed perfect.

"Emily..."

This was all he said before he leaned in and placed his warm lips to mine. It was full of passion and hunger. It felt right. He pulled me closer like we would merge to one person and I didn't hold back. I knew what I wanted and that was Leo. He wanted me as well. He pulled away taking a deep breath as foreheads touched.

"Emily... I think I want this."

He stroked my hair.

"Leo-"

He cut me off with another kiss. It was sweet and just as good as the one before. i could feel the desire and desperation in him. He pulled back and kissed me on the fore head and got up. He held onto my hand for a minute and I could feel him staring at me in the darkness. He turned and headed for the door.

"Goodnight lovely Emily."

Those were his final words before he walked out my bed room door and out to the front. I could still feel his warm lips pressed to mine. Leo was everything I wanted. Yeah he had anger issues but I would pay the price just to be with him.

“Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.”