Status: Updated :) Enjoy.
H.B. and Gypsy
I Think Its Listening.
God. Why am I feeling like this? Why did I leave Landon by himself? Fuck, Maybe I should go back…
I was only walking down his driveway when I hear his front door open. Followed by someone running after me. I look back and before I could do anything, Landon wraps his arms around my waist in a warm hug. I hug back. I feel like a total asshole for leaving him when he was trying to comfort me in his room…but I was confused. I don’t know what the hell my heart is trying to tell me.
He slowly unraveled his arms from around me and stepped back a foot or two. He kept his head slightly hung and was giving me a shy smile. I smile back and say with a pained whisper “Thanks Landon.” All he did was take a little note that he had in his pocket, placed it in my palm, smile, and walked away.
I barely even see my feet in front of me while I walk home. I was too caught up in what happened tonight.
I decided to not read the note until I got home.
I got to my front door, and opened it very slowly. I didn’t want to risk disturbing the sleeping beast. Also known as Dave Brenin. My father.
I creep up the stairs and go to my bedroom. I was ready to read this note.
I could still feel his body heat on the little piece of paper. It calmed me.
I opened it and it said:
Ill tell you, if you tell me.
Landon, you little heartbreaker.
I couldn’t stop reading those seven words over and over again.
Im not telling him. At least not yet.
I don’t even know him.
Even if I feel like I do.
I turn my head to my closet and stare at my old violin case. And in one minute, I was crying. And I didn’t give a fuck who heard me or who might walk in my room at that very moment. All I wanted was to Play.
All I wanted was to play.
I tear my eyes away from the case and wipe them dry. Im too tired for this.
Yet I cant stop. I cant fucking stop crying. The salty pools are forming beneath my eyelashes and dancing there way down my cherry colored cheeks and onto my old t-shirt.
I keep trying to wipe them away but its as if they are all trying to race down to the exact place where my heart would be, underneath my shirt. A rushing little stream straight to that mother fucking organ in my pale-as-snow chest. Which is beating way too fast for my liking right now.
I let out a sob and curl onto my side, hiding my face from the shadows in my bedroom. I feel like they are laughing at me. Pointing there smokey, black-winged fingers at me. Reminding me of when my only thing in the world, my sound, was taken away from me.
The water swirling around my irises is creating a color dripping sadness hanging thick in every corner of my room. Blues and Blacks and Screaming whites. All together in a confusing wash.
I stop looking with a choking cry. I close my eyes..
I start to hum.
I sing my favorite song to my self between the soft gasps escaping my lips, begging my tears to slow down. Telling my heart to calm.
I think its listening.
After the first chorus, The colors fade to black. And I hear nothing.
Sleep took me.
To say I was fucked up is an understatement.
_______________________________________________________________________
My eyes reluctantly peel open at I hear rustling and wind blowing up under my window.
I roll over to my usual side of the bed and snuggle up to my pillow to fall back asleep, then all the sudden…I feel paper under my pillow as I slipped my hand under to feel the smooth cool material of the untouched pillowcase. I raise my head and balance on my elbows as I pull out the paper.
It was a note.
I open it up, and a smile make sits way to my face when I see the sloppy purple letters across the new-found message.
Good morning, Ever. Sorry if this note woke you up…you know, with it being under your pillow and all. I was going to ask you to breakfast, but I didn’t have to heart to wake you up. It looks like you need it. See you tonight. -Landon
He’s quite the mystery, this boy.
I sigh and give the note a sleepy yawn and place it on my nightstand.
But wait. How’d he get into my room when I was sleeping?
I hop out of bed, and pull my clothes from the previous night off. I hadnt had a chance to change out of them…I passed out. God help me.
I walk over to by nightstand and pull my bottom drawer out. My pajama drawer. I know, usually people change out of their pj’s when they wake up, but fuck it,I make my own rules. Most of the time.
I reached in and grabbed my dark gray pajama pants and slipped them up my legs, letting it hang loosely at my waist. Right around my hip bones.
I don’t bother putting a shirt on. Its summer anyways, and it was fucking hot.
I run a hand through my dark bed-head locks with a yawn and make my way downstairs.
I go down my stairs, not missing the creaky step that is three steps from the bottom, and sulk into the kitchen. Hugging myself, trying to contain the soft heat that still radiated through me from my bed, I reach the kitchen door. The second my foot makes contact with the icy tile, I jumped in the opposite direction. “Shit!” That was not expected. fuck. Well forget about breakfast then…
I decide to go to the living room and watch some cartoons…maybe fall asleep on the couch again. But of course, right when I get situated, My mom enters.
“Was that you that I heard cursing? I wish you wouldn’t, Ever.” She complains while trying to balance grocery bags of food. “Anyway, come help with these groceries, We need to start getting ready for tonight.” I haul myself off the couch and head to the garage where I know her car would be parked. And Filled with food. Yes.
I open the garage door and a Gush of wind blows right into my direction, making me shiver and hiss. I lift my head up to walk to the trunk, and notice that my mom had left the garage door open. I stop in my tracks.
I have no fucking shirt on.
And the garage door is open.
Anyone could see me…
And as if I was asking for it, Landon opens his front door and was holding his sketch book and a bag of colored pencils while looking down. I gasped in surprise and he looks up.
Fuck.
As soon as he sees me, he gasped and dropped his sketch book and colored pencils. He stood their gaping at me…trying to not be obvious about it. While breaking his gaze from mine, he slowly crouches down and start to pick up his things. I should help him.
The second he puts his head down, I make my way across the street, not caring if I had my shirt off anymore. He already saw me anyways.
I slowly walked up to him and he raised his head with wide eyes. And stared. But not at my face. At my body. He quickly looked away when he realized I saw him staring. A brush of rose warmed his cheeks.
Hm.
I crouch down and pick up his sketch book for him, so we are at eye level. “Sorry for scaring you like that Landon, I know I must not be the prettiest wake up call.” I laugh slightly at my joke.
He just smiles and shakes his head. A blush still present on his cheeks.We stand up and he takes out his notepad. He writes something down.
You didn’t scare me… just pleasantly surprised me.
I read it and he smiled and walked towards the tree right outside his house and sat down. He started to draw.
“You really are cryptic, Landon.” I laugh.
He doesn’t look at me, but gives a painfully shy grin to himself, and continues to draw.
I gaze at him working his magic with his pencils. Maybe he’ll let me see his art sometime.
My thoughts are broken when I hear my mom yelling my name. Shit! I forgot about the food.
“Ill catch up with you later landon, I gotta help my mom with the Bar-B-Q later… you’ll be there right?” I ask.
He looks up at me and nods. But, in a split second, decides to stand up and walk over to me.
“Forget something?” I chuckle.
He lets out one of those laughs and just gives me a hug and slips his arms around my bare torso. I wrap my arms around him, feeling his warmth under my bare flesh. I felt his breath on my shoulder. Its quite relaxing.
He starts to snuggle into my neck,as if trying to get the warmth to go from me to him, sighs, and lets go. Um. Does anyone care to explain to me why this doesn’t bother me?
“…Bye” I say distracted as he smiles, turns around, curls up on his tree and continues drawing.
I walk back to my moms car and grab the last of the groceries. I opened the door to the house and hear my mom. “What took you so long, honey? Goodness.”
“Sorry, I ran into Landon.” I say. Still thinking about how he was almost…hiding in my neck just moments ago. I wonder why Landon did that? Not that I mind. I enjoy being close to another human for once, if not emotional.
“Oh, did you? He stopped by this morning to see if you wanted to go to breakfast, So I let him go see if you were awake, but I guess you were asleep. Such a sweet boy, he is.” She reveled. I nod my head. That he was.
So that’s how he got into my room this morning. Tricky little doll.
How long did I sleep in anyways? I glace at the clock above the stove.
1:15 p.m.
Damn. I slept all through the afternoon. I must have been out.
Wait, if its 1:15, then that means that the bar-b-q is in a little over 3 hours.
That’s not much time. I still need to shower, clean my room in case landon wants to see it (why do I give a shit?), and help my mom set up (joy of joys).
I sigh. So, my day begins.
“Im gonna go shower. I think I may be growing diseases by now.” I say to my mom.
“Ever, you never seize to surprise me. Go before whatever your growing spreads to the food.” My mom laughs and shoo’s me out of the room.
I go up to my room, grab some jeans, a white t-shirt, and boxers, then headed into my little bathroom. Im so fucking glad I have my own little bathroom in my room. Its quite the savior in certain situations, let me tell you.
I set my clothes down on the counter and slipped off the rest of my clothing.
I stare in the mirror at myself.
My hands start to run along my torso and my arms. Traveling in all my forgotten, untouched areas. Judging myself.
They travel down my stomach. I needed to stop being such a fatass. I mean, honestly. I was pale, slightly over weight and always had dark shadows under my eyes. You would think I was a drug addict.
I stop looking with a scoff and take my clawing hands away from my body and step into the shower. The day I feel good in my own skin is the day life makes sense again. Haha. Right.
Finishing up in only around 15 minutes, I get out of the shower and grab the closest towel to me, and wrap it around my dripping waist.
As soon as I step out of the bathroom, clouds of steam follow me.
And Then I heard someone clear their throat.
Oh, no…
I slowly look up and there was the heartbreaker himself. Landon. He gasped and covered his eyes.
“Holy fuck!”I nearly fell over in shock. Why was he always just Appearing out of nowhere?
Jesus christ, he almost saw me naked. I could just die right now.
Trying to catch my breath, I hold the towel tighter around my waist and look up at him. He just kept his head down while covering his eyes with one hand and trying to hand me a note with the other. Were his hands shaking?
I take the note and place it on my desk.
“Ill be back in two seconds” I whisper in embarrassment.
He nods his head while still covering his eyes, and I shuffle back into the bathroom.
That was beyond unexpected.
I close the door behind me and cover my face, which is now sporting a lovely strawberry tint, and walk over to the counter.
I pull my boxers and dark jeans up my thighs and let my white t-shirt fall over my shoulders and smooth against my stomach. And with one last glace in the mirror, I open the door.
Landon was still standing in the exact place I had left him.
He looked sort of nervous.
“Is…everything alright? Why are you here?” I hope that didn’t sound as harsh as I thought it did.
He quickly pulls out his notepad and scribbles something down and turns it around to show me.
I just thought maybe I could help you set up today? I didn’t want to barge into your room, but your mom said you were up here…Im sorry.
“Oh, sure, yeah that would be cool to have some help. And don’t be sorry. Its my fault. I should have locked my door. I guess I deserved it.” I say while my fingers ran themselves through my damp, messy hair.
He gives an anxious smile.
“Have a seat.” I pat a spot on my bed.He sits down quickly. Ok, is he scared of me or something? Poor kid. “Landon, its ok, really, no need to be nervous.” I add with a smile.
He mirrors my expression.
I walk over to my closet and grab my belt that was carelessly tossed in a corner, and slip it into my belt loops. Then make my way back to my desk. Landon is just watching me curiously. That’s when I notice the note that I hadnt read yet. That he had given me just minutes ago. I pick it up and turn to Landon “Should I read it or it is the same thing you told me a minute ago?” I ask.
It’s the same thing. Just toss it.
Well, ok. I tossed it into my trash bin right next to my desk and head over to my bed.
“So where would you like to begin? I have a whole ton of shit we could get started with. Most of it having to do with cleaning this hell hole.” I Motion my arms around my room. He laughs.
“Hey now, I told you that my room was the complete opposite of yours. I wasn’t lying.” I laugh at him.
He just nods his head with a grin. Then he pulls his right shirt sleeve up a little and glances at his watch, and shows me with raised eyebrows.
Shit it was almost 2:00. We should get started. “Ok then, lets get it going. I guess we will just start cleaning and hopefully it’ll end up looking alright.”
Come on, you’ve seen my room, it’ll look good if I’m involved. Organizing is one of the few things Im good at. He wrote down.
“True. Very True.”
After an hour and 40 minutes of sorting through my clothes, notebooks, trash, and other unnecessary shit, we could see the carpet! Success.
“I cant remember the last time I saw my carpet. Like all of it.” I revel.
You cant be serious. He Wrote.
“Oh I can. And I am. Over time you will start to realize im not the most organized person in the world.” I respond.
Obviously. He adds with a roll of his eyes and a shy laugh.
You know…I kinda like it when he’s more playful like this. I guess it makes me feel like he isnt scared of me, because most of the time that ive known him in these two days, he seems kinda on-edge. Except for those random moments when he decides to hug me. Still havent figured that mystery out.
“Can you tell me what time it is?” I ask Landon. He nods his head and temporarily stops his task. He was currently folding a pile of my t-shirts. They looked so perfectly in order. I think maybe he was even color-coordinating them.
He scribbled the time down.
3:40 p.m.
“Really? Thanks.” Time flew. It definitely didn’t feel like an hour and a half in here. Oh well, We should probably go ask my mom what we should do next.
“Honestly Landon, it looks fucking awesome. I seriously don’t have an iota of focus when it comes to organization.” I say while scanning over my very clean room.
Its no problem, im glad my weird habits come in handy for someone other than myself.His note read.
“That they do.” I comment. “Anyways, lets go ask my mom if there anything to get set for later, otherwise we can just kill time here or something.”
He just nods and follows me downstairs.
“Mom, you wouldn’t believe what my room looks like right now. Landon here is a fantastic little cleaner, if you didn’t already know.” I voice as im walking into the kitchen. My mom was making some cupcake assortment or something like that. Some Martha Stewart shit.
“Oh, really? Poor Landon, you had to actually be around that kind of filth. Ugh!” My Mom Complains.
He starts to laugh and I give him a little slap on the back of his arm and he immediately covers his mouth with his hand to muffle the giggles. “Hey! Don’t be hating on my room. It has character.” I retort to both of them.
“Whatever you need to tell yourself, honey.” My mom says while giving my head a little pat.
“Fine. I don’t need you patronizing me. Guess who wont do laundry for a month now? That should add some character to the laundry room .” I shoot back at her.
Landon really laughs at that one.
“Ever James Brenin, if you threaten me I wont be buying toaster strudel for a month.”
That’s just evil.
“Goddamn it all. Fine! You win this time. But it isnt over. Come on, Doll.” I grab Landons Hand and take him back up to my room while my mom laughing with victory in the background.
“Oh, mom!” I call trying to get her attention.
“What now?” She yells from the kitchen hall.
“Is there anything Landon and I have to get done or are our chains cut loose?” I say trying to not laugh at the comparison.
“You guys are fine. Just don’t bother me until 5. And don’t destroy that clean room of yours, or else Landon will have to face the wrath of your laundry basket again.” She yells.
Nice.
We run up to my room and sit on my bed. I didn’t even notice that I was holding Landons hand this whole time. I look over at him and he had an odd expression on his face. He wouldn’t look at me.
I take my hand from his grip and asked “Whats that face for?”
He took out his little notepad and wrote What face?, While trying to look away from me.
“Landon, look at me.” He shook his head.
He was being so shy! I get off my side of the bed and go to the other side of him. The side he was facing. And take his chin and move it so he’s looking at me. He was blushing furiously. A smile creeps onto my face. “Why are you blushing?”
Its nothing, I guess I just blush alot. Its kind of hard to control...
“Is there something you want to tell me?” I ask. He’s afraid to tell me something.
Well, can I ask you a question instead?
“Sure” I said with a laugh. He just did.
Downstairs…you called me “Doll”. Why?
I…I did? Oh no. I must have done it subconsciously. I guess it just seemed natural to call him that. I must have done it without even thinking.
“I…didn’t even realise that I did. I guess it just slipped out, it seemed natural.”
He just nodded his head. He started to write something down.
I kind of like it…?
He does?
“…Why?” I question.
I guess having a nickname makes me feel like we arent really strangers.
I wasn’t sure what to say.
Im sorry if Im not making sense. Forget that I said anything.Ill Go. He wrote down quickly.
He got up from the bed and headed for my door.
“Woah! Wait, Landon, where are you going?” I say while running at the door and blocking it with my body.
His cheeks have never been this shade of peppermint before. He was nervous. I glanced at his hands now frantically tracing shapes into his palm. He did that a lot. I grab both of his hands in mine. “Please tell me whats wrong.” I plead.
He looks at me. He was on the verge of tears. He blinked them back quickly and composed himself and stared at me for a second…then nodded his head slowly.
I kept one of his hands in mine and led him to my bed.
He took out his notepad and began writing.
I Have Problems, Ever. I don’t think you would care. Its ok, Ill just go.
“But I do care, Landon. You can tell me.” I quickly add in. He couldn’t leave like this. He waited a second and stared at his feet while quietly sniffling. Then he slowly lifted his hand and began to write.
Promise? He asked.
Even when he writes he sounds shy and small.
I nod my head . “I promise.” I vow. I keep my hand in his while he was writing with the other.
He began writing and I started to get sort of anxious.
I felt him place a note in my hand after about five minutes. I look over at him and he had his face buried in his hands. He looked like he was preparing for me to start yelling or something. What the fuck did this note say?
I know Im different, trust me, the kids at my schools made sure that I knew that. I don’t go well with other people. Mostly because I think differently then most. So, they would always make me pay for it. In all sorts of ways. People stay away from me. I know that people don’t like being around me, so if you want me to go, please just let me know before trying to hurt me. Ive had too much of that. Ill save you your trouble and kick myself out, now.
Oh.
I kept staring at the note and eventually heard sniffling coming from the other side of the room. Landon had made his way over to the corner next to my door. He probably thought I didn’t want to be near him. I wanted the opposite of that. I wanted to comfort him. He looks like he has been through hell and back because of this.
“Come here, Landon” I say softly. He looks up at me with lollypop red lips and bright watering eyes. He looked surprised and unsure. What have other kids put him through?
“Its ok, Come here…” I continue.
He walks towards me and I reach my hand out. He immediately covers his face and jumps back in fear.
And painfully whispers to me:
“Please don’t”
What does he-
Holy shit he just talked.
I heard his voice for the first time.
Oh
My
God.
He immediately covered his mouth after realizing the words finally escaped him. His eyes went huge as his hands covered his pouting lips tighter. He is terrified. That’s when he starts to hyperventilate.
“Shit-“ I have to do something.
I hurry over to him and take him over to my bed and sit him down. He wont look at me. “Landon look at me, please.” I wipe the tears from his face and cradle his head against my chest as he tries to gain his breath back. I run my hand up and down his back slowly and whisper calming words in his ear.
We must have been sitting there for ten minutes, then his breathing starts to slow down, as well as his sniffling. I look down at him…and notice his eyes were slowly shutting. I scoot us both to the middle of my bed, his head still resting on my chest, and lay down with him. Within one minute, he has soft even breaths, deep in sleep.
While Im wide awake. Thinking about what just happened.
I cant believe I heard him speak. I thought the day would never come. And He thought I was going to hurt him? Never.
I keep running my hand through his hair, from the nap of his neck, to right under his ear. He seemed to sigh every time I did it. I think it relaxed him. He seemed to be dreaming.
And another minute later, I was dreaming too.
____________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________
A/N: Guess what guys? Im going to post Ch.4 Tomorrow! I got a burst of inspiration and wrote it all tonight.
What did you guys think of this chapter? What was your favorite part? :)
I was only walking down his driveway when I hear his front door open. Followed by someone running after me. I look back and before I could do anything, Landon wraps his arms around my waist in a warm hug. I hug back. I feel like a total asshole for leaving him when he was trying to comfort me in his room…but I was confused. I don’t know what the hell my heart is trying to tell me.
He slowly unraveled his arms from around me and stepped back a foot or two. He kept his head slightly hung and was giving me a shy smile. I smile back and say with a pained whisper “Thanks Landon.” All he did was take a little note that he had in his pocket, placed it in my palm, smile, and walked away.
I barely even see my feet in front of me while I walk home. I was too caught up in what happened tonight.
I decided to not read the note until I got home.
I got to my front door, and opened it very slowly. I didn’t want to risk disturbing the sleeping beast. Also known as Dave Brenin. My father.
I creep up the stairs and go to my bedroom. I was ready to read this note.
I could still feel his body heat on the little piece of paper. It calmed me.
I opened it and it said:
Ill tell you, if you tell me.
Landon, you little heartbreaker.
I couldn’t stop reading those seven words over and over again.
Im not telling him. At least not yet.
I don’t even know him.
Even if I feel like I do.
I turn my head to my closet and stare at my old violin case. And in one minute, I was crying. And I didn’t give a fuck who heard me or who might walk in my room at that very moment. All I wanted was to Play.
All I wanted was to play.
I tear my eyes away from the case and wipe them dry. Im too tired for this.
Yet I cant stop. I cant fucking stop crying. The salty pools are forming beneath my eyelashes and dancing there way down my cherry colored cheeks and onto my old t-shirt.
I keep trying to wipe them away but its as if they are all trying to race down to the exact place where my heart would be, underneath my shirt. A rushing little stream straight to that mother fucking organ in my pale-as-snow chest. Which is beating way too fast for my liking right now.
I let out a sob and curl onto my side, hiding my face from the shadows in my bedroom. I feel like they are laughing at me. Pointing there smokey, black-winged fingers at me. Reminding me of when my only thing in the world, my sound, was taken away from me.
The water swirling around my irises is creating a color dripping sadness hanging thick in every corner of my room. Blues and Blacks and Screaming whites. All together in a confusing wash.
I stop looking with a choking cry. I close my eyes..
I start to hum.
I sing my favorite song to my self between the soft gasps escaping my lips, begging my tears to slow down. Telling my heart to calm.
I think its listening.
After the first chorus, The colors fade to black. And I hear nothing.
Sleep took me.
To say I was fucked up is an understatement.
_______________________________________________________________________
My eyes reluctantly peel open at I hear rustling and wind blowing up under my window.
I roll over to my usual side of the bed and snuggle up to my pillow to fall back asleep, then all the sudden…I feel paper under my pillow as I slipped my hand under to feel the smooth cool material of the untouched pillowcase. I raise my head and balance on my elbows as I pull out the paper.
It was a note.
I open it up, and a smile make sits way to my face when I see the sloppy purple letters across the new-found message.
Good morning, Ever. Sorry if this note woke you up…you know, with it being under your pillow and all. I was going to ask you to breakfast, but I didn’t have to heart to wake you up. It looks like you need it. See you tonight. -Landon
He’s quite the mystery, this boy.
I sigh and give the note a sleepy yawn and place it on my nightstand.
But wait. How’d he get into my room when I was sleeping?
I hop out of bed, and pull my clothes from the previous night off. I hadnt had a chance to change out of them…I passed out. God help me.
I walk over to by nightstand and pull my bottom drawer out. My pajama drawer. I know, usually people change out of their pj’s when they wake up, but fuck it,I make my own rules. Most of the time.
I reached in and grabbed my dark gray pajama pants and slipped them up my legs, letting it hang loosely at my waist. Right around my hip bones.
I don’t bother putting a shirt on. Its summer anyways, and it was fucking hot.
I run a hand through my dark bed-head locks with a yawn and make my way downstairs.
I go down my stairs, not missing the creaky step that is three steps from the bottom, and sulk into the kitchen. Hugging myself, trying to contain the soft heat that still radiated through me from my bed, I reach the kitchen door. The second my foot makes contact with the icy tile, I jumped in the opposite direction. “Shit!” That was not expected. fuck. Well forget about breakfast then…
I decide to go to the living room and watch some cartoons…maybe fall asleep on the couch again. But of course, right when I get situated, My mom enters.
“Was that you that I heard cursing? I wish you wouldn’t, Ever.” She complains while trying to balance grocery bags of food. “Anyway, come help with these groceries, We need to start getting ready for tonight.” I haul myself off the couch and head to the garage where I know her car would be parked. And Filled with food. Yes.
I open the garage door and a Gush of wind blows right into my direction, making me shiver and hiss. I lift my head up to walk to the trunk, and notice that my mom had left the garage door open. I stop in my tracks.
I have no fucking shirt on.
And the garage door is open.
Anyone could see me…
And as if I was asking for it, Landon opens his front door and was holding his sketch book and a bag of colored pencils while looking down. I gasped in surprise and he looks up.
Fuck.
As soon as he sees me, he gasped and dropped his sketch book and colored pencils. He stood their gaping at me…trying to not be obvious about it. While breaking his gaze from mine, he slowly crouches down and start to pick up his things. I should help him.
The second he puts his head down, I make my way across the street, not caring if I had my shirt off anymore. He already saw me anyways.
I slowly walked up to him and he raised his head with wide eyes. And stared. But not at my face. At my body. He quickly looked away when he realized I saw him staring. A brush of rose warmed his cheeks.
Hm.
I crouch down and pick up his sketch book for him, so we are at eye level. “Sorry for scaring you like that Landon, I know I must not be the prettiest wake up call.” I laugh slightly at my joke.
He just smiles and shakes his head. A blush still present on his cheeks.We stand up and he takes out his notepad. He writes something down.
You didn’t scare me… just pleasantly surprised me.
I read it and he smiled and walked towards the tree right outside his house and sat down. He started to draw.
“You really are cryptic, Landon.” I laugh.
He doesn’t look at me, but gives a painfully shy grin to himself, and continues to draw.
I gaze at him working his magic with his pencils. Maybe he’ll let me see his art sometime.
My thoughts are broken when I hear my mom yelling my name. Shit! I forgot about the food.
“Ill catch up with you later landon, I gotta help my mom with the Bar-B-Q later… you’ll be there right?” I ask.
He looks up at me and nods. But, in a split second, decides to stand up and walk over to me.
“Forget something?” I chuckle.
He lets out one of those laughs and just gives me a hug and slips his arms around my bare torso. I wrap my arms around him, feeling his warmth under my bare flesh. I felt his breath on my shoulder. Its quite relaxing.
He starts to snuggle into my neck,as if trying to get the warmth to go from me to him, sighs, and lets go. Um. Does anyone care to explain to me why this doesn’t bother me?
“…Bye” I say distracted as he smiles, turns around, curls up on his tree and continues drawing.
I walk back to my moms car and grab the last of the groceries. I opened the door to the house and hear my mom. “What took you so long, honey? Goodness.”
“Sorry, I ran into Landon.” I say. Still thinking about how he was almost…hiding in my neck just moments ago. I wonder why Landon did that? Not that I mind. I enjoy being close to another human for once, if not emotional.
“Oh, did you? He stopped by this morning to see if you wanted to go to breakfast, So I let him go see if you were awake, but I guess you were asleep. Such a sweet boy, he is.” She reveled. I nod my head. That he was.
So that’s how he got into my room this morning. Tricky little doll.
How long did I sleep in anyways? I glace at the clock above the stove.
1:15 p.m.
Damn. I slept all through the afternoon. I must have been out.
Wait, if its 1:15, then that means that the bar-b-q is in a little over 3 hours.
That’s not much time. I still need to shower, clean my room in case landon wants to see it (why do I give a shit?), and help my mom set up (joy of joys).
I sigh. So, my day begins.
“Im gonna go shower. I think I may be growing diseases by now.” I say to my mom.
“Ever, you never seize to surprise me. Go before whatever your growing spreads to the food.” My mom laughs and shoo’s me out of the room.
I go up to my room, grab some jeans, a white t-shirt, and boxers, then headed into my little bathroom. Im so fucking glad I have my own little bathroom in my room. Its quite the savior in certain situations, let me tell you.
I set my clothes down on the counter and slipped off the rest of my clothing.
I stare in the mirror at myself.
My hands start to run along my torso and my arms. Traveling in all my forgotten, untouched areas. Judging myself.
They travel down my stomach. I needed to stop being such a fatass. I mean, honestly. I was pale, slightly over weight and always had dark shadows under my eyes. You would think I was a drug addict.
I stop looking with a scoff and take my clawing hands away from my body and step into the shower. The day I feel good in my own skin is the day life makes sense again. Haha. Right.
Finishing up in only around 15 minutes, I get out of the shower and grab the closest towel to me, and wrap it around my dripping waist.
As soon as I step out of the bathroom, clouds of steam follow me.
And Then I heard someone clear their throat.
Oh, no…
I slowly look up and there was the heartbreaker himself. Landon. He gasped and covered his eyes.
“Holy fuck!”I nearly fell over in shock. Why was he always just Appearing out of nowhere?
Jesus christ, he almost saw me naked. I could just die right now.
Trying to catch my breath, I hold the towel tighter around my waist and look up at him. He just kept his head down while covering his eyes with one hand and trying to hand me a note with the other. Were his hands shaking?
I take the note and place it on my desk.
“Ill be back in two seconds” I whisper in embarrassment.
He nods his head while still covering his eyes, and I shuffle back into the bathroom.
That was beyond unexpected.
I close the door behind me and cover my face, which is now sporting a lovely strawberry tint, and walk over to the counter.
I pull my boxers and dark jeans up my thighs and let my white t-shirt fall over my shoulders and smooth against my stomach. And with one last glace in the mirror, I open the door.
Landon was still standing in the exact place I had left him.
He looked sort of nervous.
“Is…everything alright? Why are you here?” I hope that didn’t sound as harsh as I thought it did.
He quickly pulls out his notepad and scribbles something down and turns it around to show me.
I just thought maybe I could help you set up today? I didn’t want to barge into your room, but your mom said you were up here…Im sorry.
“Oh, sure, yeah that would be cool to have some help. And don’t be sorry. Its my fault. I should have locked my door. I guess I deserved it.” I say while my fingers ran themselves through my damp, messy hair.
He gives an anxious smile.
“Have a seat.” I pat a spot on my bed.He sits down quickly. Ok, is he scared of me or something? Poor kid. “Landon, its ok, really, no need to be nervous.” I add with a smile.
He mirrors my expression.
I walk over to my closet and grab my belt that was carelessly tossed in a corner, and slip it into my belt loops. Then make my way back to my desk. Landon is just watching me curiously. That’s when I notice the note that I hadnt read yet. That he had given me just minutes ago. I pick it up and turn to Landon “Should I read it or it is the same thing you told me a minute ago?” I ask.
It’s the same thing. Just toss it.
Well, ok. I tossed it into my trash bin right next to my desk and head over to my bed.
“So where would you like to begin? I have a whole ton of shit we could get started with. Most of it having to do with cleaning this hell hole.” I Motion my arms around my room. He laughs.
“Hey now, I told you that my room was the complete opposite of yours. I wasn’t lying.” I laugh at him.
He just nods his head with a grin. Then he pulls his right shirt sleeve up a little and glances at his watch, and shows me with raised eyebrows.
Shit it was almost 2:00. We should get started. “Ok then, lets get it going. I guess we will just start cleaning and hopefully it’ll end up looking alright.”
Come on, you’ve seen my room, it’ll look good if I’m involved. Organizing is one of the few things Im good at. He wrote down.
“True. Very True.”
After an hour and 40 minutes of sorting through my clothes, notebooks, trash, and other unnecessary shit, we could see the carpet! Success.
“I cant remember the last time I saw my carpet. Like all of it.” I revel.
You cant be serious. He Wrote.
“Oh I can. And I am. Over time you will start to realize im not the most organized person in the world.” I respond.
Obviously. He adds with a roll of his eyes and a shy laugh.
You know…I kinda like it when he’s more playful like this. I guess it makes me feel like he isnt scared of me, because most of the time that ive known him in these two days, he seems kinda on-edge. Except for those random moments when he decides to hug me. Still havent figured that mystery out.
“Can you tell me what time it is?” I ask Landon. He nods his head and temporarily stops his task. He was currently folding a pile of my t-shirts. They looked so perfectly in order. I think maybe he was even color-coordinating them.
He scribbled the time down.
3:40 p.m.
“Really? Thanks.” Time flew. It definitely didn’t feel like an hour and a half in here. Oh well, We should probably go ask my mom what we should do next.
“Honestly Landon, it looks fucking awesome. I seriously don’t have an iota of focus when it comes to organization.” I say while scanning over my very clean room.
Its no problem, im glad my weird habits come in handy for someone other than myself.His note read.
“That they do.” I comment. “Anyways, lets go ask my mom if there anything to get set for later, otherwise we can just kill time here or something.”
He just nods and follows me downstairs.
“Mom, you wouldn’t believe what my room looks like right now. Landon here is a fantastic little cleaner, if you didn’t already know.” I voice as im walking into the kitchen. My mom was making some cupcake assortment or something like that. Some Martha Stewart shit.
“Oh, really? Poor Landon, you had to actually be around that kind of filth. Ugh!” My Mom Complains.
He starts to laugh and I give him a little slap on the back of his arm and he immediately covers his mouth with his hand to muffle the giggles. “Hey! Don’t be hating on my room. It has character.” I retort to both of them.
“Whatever you need to tell yourself, honey.” My mom says while giving my head a little pat.
“Fine. I don’t need you patronizing me. Guess who wont do laundry for a month now? That should add some character to the laundry room .” I shoot back at her.
Landon really laughs at that one.
“Ever James Brenin, if you threaten me I wont be buying toaster strudel for a month.”
That’s just evil.
“Goddamn it all. Fine! You win this time. But it isnt over. Come on, Doll.” I grab Landons Hand and take him back up to my room while my mom laughing with victory in the background.
“Oh, mom!” I call trying to get her attention.
“What now?” She yells from the kitchen hall.
“Is there anything Landon and I have to get done or are our chains cut loose?” I say trying to not laugh at the comparison.
“You guys are fine. Just don’t bother me until 5. And don’t destroy that clean room of yours, or else Landon will have to face the wrath of your laundry basket again.” She yells.
Nice.
We run up to my room and sit on my bed. I didn’t even notice that I was holding Landons hand this whole time. I look over at him and he had an odd expression on his face. He wouldn’t look at me.
I take my hand from his grip and asked “Whats that face for?”
He took out his little notepad and wrote What face?, While trying to look away from me.
“Landon, look at me.” He shook his head.
He was being so shy! I get off my side of the bed and go to the other side of him. The side he was facing. And take his chin and move it so he’s looking at me. He was blushing furiously. A smile creeps onto my face. “Why are you blushing?”
Its nothing, I guess I just blush alot. Its kind of hard to control...
“Is there something you want to tell me?” I ask. He’s afraid to tell me something.
Well, can I ask you a question instead?
“Sure” I said with a laugh. He just did.
Downstairs…you called me “Doll”. Why?
I…I did? Oh no. I must have done it subconsciously. I guess it just seemed natural to call him that. I must have done it without even thinking.
“I…didn’t even realise that I did. I guess it just slipped out, it seemed natural.”
He just nodded his head. He started to write something down.
I kind of like it…?
He does?
“…Why?” I question.
I guess having a nickname makes me feel like we arent really strangers.
I wasn’t sure what to say.
Im sorry if Im not making sense. Forget that I said anything.Ill Go. He wrote down quickly.
He got up from the bed and headed for my door.
“Woah! Wait, Landon, where are you going?” I say while running at the door and blocking it with my body.
His cheeks have never been this shade of peppermint before. He was nervous. I glanced at his hands now frantically tracing shapes into his palm. He did that a lot. I grab both of his hands in mine. “Please tell me whats wrong.” I plead.
He looks at me. He was on the verge of tears. He blinked them back quickly and composed himself and stared at me for a second…then nodded his head slowly.
I kept one of his hands in mine and led him to my bed.
He took out his notepad and began writing.
I Have Problems, Ever. I don’t think you would care. Its ok, Ill just go.
“But I do care, Landon. You can tell me.” I quickly add in. He couldn’t leave like this. He waited a second and stared at his feet while quietly sniffling. Then he slowly lifted his hand and began to write.
Promise? He asked.
Even when he writes he sounds shy and small.
I nod my head . “I promise.” I vow. I keep my hand in his while he was writing with the other.
He began writing and I started to get sort of anxious.
I felt him place a note in my hand after about five minutes. I look over at him and he had his face buried in his hands. He looked like he was preparing for me to start yelling or something. What the fuck did this note say?
I know Im different, trust me, the kids at my schools made sure that I knew that. I don’t go well with other people. Mostly because I think differently then most. So, they would always make me pay for it. In all sorts of ways. People stay away from me. I know that people don’t like being around me, so if you want me to go, please just let me know before trying to hurt me. Ive had too much of that. Ill save you your trouble and kick myself out, now.
Oh.
I kept staring at the note and eventually heard sniffling coming from the other side of the room. Landon had made his way over to the corner next to my door. He probably thought I didn’t want to be near him. I wanted the opposite of that. I wanted to comfort him. He looks like he has been through hell and back because of this.
“Come here, Landon” I say softly. He looks up at me with lollypop red lips and bright watering eyes. He looked surprised and unsure. What have other kids put him through?
“Its ok, Come here…” I continue.
He walks towards me and I reach my hand out. He immediately covers his face and jumps back in fear.
And painfully whispers to me:
“Please don’t”
What does he-
Holy shit he just talked.
I heard his voice for the first time.
Oh
My
God.
He immediately covered his mouth after realizing the words finally escaped him. His eyes went huge as his hands covered his pouting lips tighter. He is terrified. That’s when he starts to hyperventilate.
“Shit-“ I have to do something.
I hurry over to him and take him over to my bed and sit him down. He wont look at me. “Landon look at me, please.” I wipe the tears from his face and cradle his head against my chest as he tries to gain his breath back. I run my hand up and down his back slowly and whisper calming words in his ear.
We must have been sitting there for ten minutes, then his breathing starts to slow down, as well as his sniffling. I look down at him…and notice his eyes were slowly shutting. I scoot us both to the middle of my bed, his head still resting on my chest, and lay down with him. Within one minute, he has soft even breaths, deep in sleep.
While Im wide awake. Thinking about what just happened.
I cant believe I heard him speak. I thought the day would never come. And He thought I was going to hurt him? Never.
I keep running my hand through his hair, from the nap of his neck, to right under his ear. He seemed to sigh every time I did it. I think it relaxed him. He seemed to be dreaming.
And another minute later, I was dreaming too.
____________________________________________________________________________
____________________________________________________________________________
A/N: Guess what guys? Im going to post Ch.4 Tomorrow! I got a burst of inspiration and wrote it all tonight.
What did you guys think of this chapter? What was your favorite part? :)