It Hurts in the Worst Way

My teeth sunk into my lip deeply as I took a few slow steps towards the edge of the stage. I’m sure I was see-able to most people in the crowd but I was nervous. I wasn’t a crowd person. Sure I could be the bands merchbitch girl, but that was way different that actually being on stage.

On stage hundreds of people were watching you – you’re every move, listening to every word you say. But being at the merch table all you do is serve people like if you were working in a shop – you may talk to them, smile at them and after they got the item they want, they walk away thinking nothing more of it. Being on stage people could talk about it, for days; even weeks.

Craig looked at me with soft eyes asking me to walk out to him. I could see Max, Monte and Robert smiling brightly as if they were asking the same thing as well. I took a slow deep breath and walked out onto the stage towards Craig slowly. I could feel my face head up from embarrassment as some fans cheered and the rest started at me.

Once I was close to Craig he pulled me into a tight hug. For a second I pretty much cling into him. He laughed into my hair and pulled away as much as I didn’t want him to, but kept his arm around my waist. Monte walked past us and kissed my cheek quickly. I smiled at him before facing the crowd.

“Everyone say hi to our merch bitch Claire-bear!” Max said into the mic.

As he said ‘bear’ I turned my head to glare at him. Did he really have to call me that, on stage!? Robert burst out into fits of laughs behind the drums. My glare turned to him before Craig got my attention back.

“So this being our last show for the tour we like to do something special or far out for you fucking lovely fans.” Craig stated getting a hell of a lot of cheers. “Even though Max got his pyrotechnics that he has wanted for the last six tours-“
“Isn’t they awesome!” Max yelled. “I love them, their fucking shinny!”
“Max; shut up I’m talking.” Craig smirked.

Max stuck his tongue out at Craig and he did it back. I couldn’t help but laugh that that – apparently neither could some of the fans.

“So I was saying, though we have the fire, I wanted to do something else tonight.” He continued bring me really close to him causing me to wrap my arms around him too. “I’m going to do a cover of a song, an acoustic cover.”

As Craig said that the fans went crazy. I looked at him surprised yet curious. Craig smiled at me and kissed my forehead softly letting his lips linger there longer than what they should do, not that I would ever complain from that. I heard a few ‘awe’s from the fans that made me blush.

Craig signalled for someone off stage and about three people walked on stage and before I knew it, Monte had an acoustic guitar in his hands, Craig had a mic stand and the two of us had stools to sit on. Craig unwrapped his arm from around me and placed the mic into the stand and messed around with it, getting it into the right spot before sitting down. He patted the stool next to him and I sat down shyly. Monte pulled a stool over and sat on the other side of me. Craig took my hand and cleared his throat before smiling at me.

“So before I start this song I have some more important things to say,” Craig said now looking at the fans. “This song here that I’m about to sing, is not one of our songs; I was going to sing ‘something’ but decided not too when I found out that Claire here loves this song to bits. This song is for Claire.”

Craig looked at me smiling and I couldn’t help but smile back, though I was surprised over the fact he was singing a song for me. I’m not sure what it is because there are so many songs I love. If I was to say that I knew why he was singing me a song, I would be lying.

“As most of you probably know by now at the start of this tour I lost two of my cousins that I am close to, even though Clair was sick and ended up in hospital from an allergic reaction, she was there for me the whole entire time. I’m proud to admit she is one of my best friends and the girl I love.”

My eyes widen and I’m sure my mouth fell open slightly. He loves me. For the last two or so weeks since we were together we never said anything like that to each other. He did say he adored me once, which almost made me run away from how hard I was blushing. I blinked looked at him in the eyes. He smiled again and Monte started the first few cords of the song.

‘Open up your eyes, raise your voices
Don’t you realise? You’re the chorus
And it won’t be long, Keep holding on
We’ll fan these flames until they light
A beacon home, to lead us on this open road.’

I’m pretty sure right then when I recognised the song my eyes went wider. I for one never thought Craig would sing this song or even knew this song to begin with; even if it was one of my favourites.

‘You’re building me up, you break me out
You’re always right here waiting
Right here from the start, you burn so bright
You are the light that guides me home.’

‘Sometimes we get so tired, still we’re trying
Standing side by side, we’re not alone
We’ll keep fighting
Cause it won’t be long, keep holding on
We’ll fan these flames until they light
A beacon home, to lead us on this open road.’

My shocked expression slowly turned into a soft smile and I left tears pool at my eyes. No one has ever done anything like this for me before. My heart felt like it was in my throat with happiness and a whole much of other emotions, which I had no names for.

‘You’re building me up, you break me out
You’re always right here waiting
Right here waiting to start, you burn so bright
You are the light that guides me home.’

‘It’s happening now, we’ve taken so long
To figure this out, cause somehow
We’re moving each other on.’

Monte stopped playing and Craig turned to face me singing the chorus once again softly. The first tear fell from my eye and as Craig stopped singing letting the mic go he pulled me into a very tight hug, before I had the chance to even think of tackling him in a hug. I wrapped my arms around him tighter than what he was holding me and let my happy tears fall on his shoulder as the crowd went completely nuts.

“I love you Claire.” Craig said in my ear over the loud cheers.
“I love you too.”

I choked back a sob and buried my head into his shoulder until I could hold my tears back better. I moved my head to I could look him in the eyes.

“Thank you.”

Craig beamed at me and placed his lips on mine.

People might say nothing is ever perfect; but for me, this moment was.

*~*~*

The guys finished off the rest of the set with a lot of fire and I have to agree with Max; it was fucking shinny. As they got off stage and the show ended I rushed back to Ash and the merch table to help pack up, it was the last I could do after leaving him there for over half the show. No wonder Craig had called him. How the hell Craig planned that all for me has me beat; but it was the nicest and sweetest thing anyone had ever done for me.

As I got around the corner I found Ash trying to pack up the tables surrounded much of over packed boxes pilled ready to be put away for the next tour.

Beaming as I walked up to my cousin, who I found out was the one that told Craig about that song, I wrapped my arms around his waist from behind. Ash jumped and almost screamed from the sudden shock of me there. I laughed still not letting go.

“A warning would be nice!” Ash wined turning around in my arms.

Ashe hugged me shortly before pulling away. I kissed his cheek quickly before setting the legs down on the other end of the table that was upside down. He did the other side before we both picked it up and starting to walk with it to the closest door that led to the bus.

“Thankyou Ash.” I smiled as we got outside.

We placed the table down where Ash had already put the other one against the bus and looked at me tilting his head to the side.

“Thank you for what exactly?”
“Helping Craig with the surprise, that song and helping me with the merch again.”
“You’re fully welcomed my lovely cousin.” He smiled bowing a little.

I laughed and hit his shoulder. He smirked and we started heading back inside of the venue for the boxes.

“So ready for the party at my place tonight?” Ash asked.

I raised an eyebrow.

“There is going to be a party at your place?” I asked confused.

Ash started laughing and placed his arm around my shoulders.

“Wow, there’s a lot of surprises for you tonight.” He chuckled. “And yes there is going to be a party for the end of tour, I has music, drinks, the lot!”

I smiled up at Ash and he beamed at me before letting me go and grabbing a box. I picked up a couple of smaller ones and we walked back out to the bus.

Leaning right against the side of the bus was Craig with a bright smile. I placed the boxes down and walked over to hug him, somehow he turned that into him carrying me bridle style.

“Craig, put me down please.”
“Nope! Ash can get the last box, we have a party to get ready for.” He smirked.

*~*~*

“So you’re sure there are no more surprises planned?” I asked looking around Ash’s house.

I haven’t been here in so long it almost felt weird to be here, and from time to time I have lived here. It was weird to even say I felt weird slightly here, make sense?

“None that I know of, I’m all planned out.” Craig laughed.

I chuckled and leaned back against him as I sat on his lap. He’s arms were wrapped around me and I don’t think he was going to let go anytime soon, which I don’t mind. I felt like I could sit here for a long, long time and still love being like this. Though I have to admit I wish Craig wasn’t drinking whatever he was drinking, because it stinks. It kinda put me off for drinking tonight.

Sighing lightly I looked around the living room of the house. People were standing around talking, dancing, drinking and singing to the songs that were playing. Ash had invited a bunch of our friends, that I haven’t seen for a long time and most of the people that was part of tonight’s show, our guitar techs etc.

After watching some people dance for a while I noticed Monte in with them dancing with some girl, Robert was talking to people in a large group, and I haven’t seen Max in a while. The last I’ve seen of him tonight he was with a girl called Tasha, no; Natasha. That’s right.

I smiled and turned to look at Craig.

“So how did you come up with that brilliant surprise in the first place?” I asked curious.

He had to have been thinking of something to come up with it.

“A whole lot of thinking, I first got the idea of Ash coming for the show.” He smiled softly. “I thought it would be nice for you to spend time with your cousin.” He said softly but I heard him over the music.

His eyes were soft as much as his smile was. I felt my heart melt hearing that. He lost two cousins that he was very close too and he did that for me, so I could spend time with mine. Even if it did hurt him, he still did it.

“It was very nice, thank you.” I said just as soft.

I leant forward and kissed his forehead softly and he tightens his hold on me. When I moved my lips away I placed my forehead against his, his eyes looking right into mine.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled. “I love you.”
“I love you too Craig.”

His smiled got as big as what mine was before he placed his lips on mine. I kissed him back lovely before I felt a tip on my shoulder followed by a camera flash. Me and Craig pulled away to see Ash standing there looking at his camera.

“That one’s going on the fridge.” He winked at us before walking away.

Craig laughed with me placing his face into my hair softly.