Invisible

It’s been a week since Jeremy snapped out of his depression. Roger calls him everyday, or they’ll hang out with some friends. A lot of our old friends are back for Thanksgiving. Carol and Maggie check on him every once in a while, my dad even stopped by to see Jeremy. They talked for the longest time about life, me, Jeremy’s college choice. He missed out in Arizona. But when he called the coach and school about his situation, they let him try out again. He starts next fall.

I even watched my little brother Aaron yesterday; he’s getting bigger and bigger by the second. My mother still has so much hurt in her eyes, but I can see it’s getting a little better. Richard, is back to work, he started not to long ago as an architect. He majored in it, but never went throw with it, until now.

Raven hasn’t come by since I found out I was pregnant. I kind of miss her, but I know what she would tell me, “You have to forgive,” or “it’s not so hard.” Blah, blah, blah.
I walked by the prison Mr. Robin was at. Mr. Robin is there until they decided his sentencing, apparently, he confessed to killing me. I walked into his cell, where he was reading a book. His hair was longer, he smelt horrible, and he was slightly skinnier than before.

I sat in front of him, watching how he twitched with every movement, or how he rocked back and forth on his bed. He was loosing it.

“Oh boy.” I whispered.

Mr. Robin grabbed a piece of paper and pen and started writing down something. I leaned over his shoulder to see, it was a scripture from the bible. He was reading the bible. I lifted my eyes slowly to stare at Mr. Robin. He was writing down the scripture about forgiveness. Then below it he wrote, “Lindsey Hamilton, I killed her. Raped her. Took away all her dreams and hopes, most importantly, took away her baby. I was shocked when I heard that. Sick to my stomach. Yes, hate took over. It was Jeremy’s baby. I loved Lindsey, I hated Jeremy. But now I see, she was never mine to love. Her heart was with Jeremy. Dear Lord, forgive me. I killed a beautiful woman with talent, blessed with a wonderful family. Please. Give me the answer, how do I know Lindsey has forgiven me? Or how will I know she will ever forgive me? Is she with you Lord? Is she an angel? Is she with her baby? Tell me Lord. I want my mind to rest in peace too. Help me. Help me. Help me. Help me.”

Shocked, I watched a tear fall from his eyes onto the paper. It stained the last word, “Please.”

Something inside me clenched my stomach, fear? Anger? No, it was sorrow. I was actually feeling sorry for Mr. Robin. Sorry. He said sorry to me. Sorry to God. I wasn’t going to forgive him now, but this was a step. I could almost feel the touch of a soft hand on my cheek. Like someone was happy I was here.