Protect Me From What I Want

“Welcome back, toots,” The Joker sang as he heaved open the back doors of the van. The snow here was just as bad as it was at Arkham. The path leading up to the building was no longer visible as it had been completely consumed by the thick blanket of snow. In all my years of living in Gotham, it was very rare that anyone would see a single snowflake let alone a furious blizzard of icy snow overtaking everything that it lay upon. So, being new to the whole snowy weather, I was a little excited at the sight of it.

All of The Joker’s men piled out of the van, some slipping in the process and then The Joker followed after, being careful not to slip. “Come on then,” he said as he faced me stood still inside the van. He opened up his arms as if welcoming me into a hug and began beckoning me by flicking his wrists in his direction. I realised that he was offering to carry me, considering that my feet were still bare. Unsurely, I walked over to him not knowing how he was planning on carrying me. Was he going to throw me over his shoulder? Carry me bridal style? Or maybe he was going to give me a piggy back. That option sounded fun, but I doubted he’d do it seeing as his front was facing me and not his back. When I reached the edge of the van, I did nothing but look down at him, waiting for him to make the first move. I wasn’t even sure if he knew himself how he was planning on carrying me. “Wrap your legs around me, or something,” he said as he snaked his arms around my waist. I did as I was told and wrapped my arms over his shoulders too, to keep myself from falling. His arms were placed firmly under my bum as to not let me fall. This position was the kind a mother would use to carry her toddler, so it was more than a little awkward to say the least.

Nevertheless, he kicked the van doors closed and began marching off towards the house. For a moment, he forgot all about the iciness of the pathway and ended with his foot slipping painfully to the side but recovered almost instantaneously after. Thinking that I was going to fall too I let out a little yelp as he slipped. When he began acting nonchalant after, I couldn’t stifle the giggles that were threatening to erupt and he began glaring at me through the corner of his eyes thinking that I hadn’t noticed his little slip up. He merely shrugged my giggling off and focused more on not tripping over again.

The Joker placed me on the floor as soon as we entered the manor and began wiping the snow from off his hunched shoulders. Even though I’d been in this very room many times before, I still felt slightly lost with small sense of anxiety still lingering. Bad memories stuck with me; one more so than others. That time where I was virtually bullied in front of all The Joker’s men in particular was etched in my mind and I was constantly reminded of it every time I entered the room.

“I want you to go upstairs and take a hot bath. I don’t want you dying of pneumonia or anything. Go,” he ordered pushing me gently in the direction of the stairs. “Well done, uh, Tommy,” I heard The Joker praise one of his men almost forgetting his name. It felt as if I hadn’t been here for years, let alone a few months. Still, I knew exactly where I was heading as I had been down these corridors so many times before. Nothing had changed when I entered the master bedroom and it still maintained the coldness, even more so now that the weather was worse.

I was glad to step into the hot water in the bath and out of the freezing cold air. I immediately sunk deep into the bath so the warmth could take over my body. I would have drifted off to sleep if it wasn’t for the footsteps approaching the bathroom door, volume increasing slowly. I sunk further attempting to cover up my nudity.

The Joker entered the room holding one of his shirts folded up in his arms along with my underwear. I’m assuming that they were for me, considering that I doubt he’d like parading around in my underwear thinking about how good he looked in the mirror. What a disturbing thought, but I couldn’t help giggling slightly. I shrugged it off and focused on the current situation.

“Thank you,” I muttered as he placed the clothes on the floor next to the bath. I carefully watched him, truly expecting him to leave afterwards but instead he sat down on the tiled floor beside the bath. No way could I relax and bathe with him watching me all the while, even if I had known him for a long period of time now. I tried distracting myself from the current awkwardness by asking questions. “Um...J?”

“Mhmm?”

“You wouldn’t happen to know if a girl escaped the asylum would you?”

“A lot of people escaped the asylum, Harley. How am I supposed to know what girl you’re talking about?”

“She’s called Poison Ivy; have you heard of her?”

“Have you been making up friends while you were in there, hmm?”

“No,” I replied sternly. “She’s real. She has bright red hair and she’s really tall. She loves plants and she’s really beautiful. She’s pretty hard to miss.”

“Nah. Don’t remember seeing her. Why?”

“Just morbid curiosity.” I hope she was okay. I felt confident, knowing that she was a strong woman and she would have been able to survive by herself; I was almost certain of that. “She was a good friend to me in Arkham.”

“I hope she wasn’t poisoning your mind with filth, trying to turn you against me. Just like that silly psychiatrist of yours...and look what happened to her.” He smiled sadistically at me. “Wouldn’t want the same thing happening to your little friend, now would we?”

“Don’t touch her,” I warned fearfully. “I’ll never forgive you for it.” He merely laughed in response and leaned back against the wall staring straight ahead. After his laughter had died down the room became peacefully quiet with only the splashes of the water hitting the edges of the bath making a noise every now and again. “J?” I hushed breaking the silence.

“Hmm?”

“Why did you leave me on the roof?” I asked, now that I knew we were both in a tranquil state.

He let out a loud sigh before replying with, “I already told you. I was doing it because I knew we weren’t good for each other and you had told me you wanted to get away from this place.”

“So why did you come and get me?”

“Because Harley,” he started sounding a little agitated. “I wanted you back.”

“Am I going to be part of another one of your brilliant schemes without you telling me? What are you planning this time?”

“Nothing, Harley! Will you just leave it and stop asking questions! Why can’t you just accept the fact that I wanted to rescue you from Arkham with no strings attached?!” He shouted making me jump slightly. “And besides, I had nothing else to do. You were in Arkham and Batman spent most of his time in Arkham with you as if he had forgotten all about me. You stole of his attention away from me! The only way I could regain his attention was to get you back.”

“Oh, so that’s how it is! You’re only using me to get to Batman!” I accused jokingly.

“No, Harley! Stop making things difficult and shut up!” He bellowed furiously.

Like a scolded puppy I lowered my head with my tail between my legs. I hadn’t been serious with the taunting, but by saying it, it had made him upset. I regretted it, but I wouldn’t have thought it would have affected him like it did, considering it was just a playful joke. “I was only kidding,” I muttered to myself sounding a lot like a sulky teenager.

“Look, listen. Let’s not start arguing on your first night back, hmm? Let’s just forget all about this. I’m sure you’re a little cranky because you’re tired and I’m a little cranky because I didn’t get to see any explosions, so let’s just pretend to be happy, hmm? I’ll try not to shout at you if you stop asking questions.” I nodded meekly in return. “Good girl,” he praised as he leaned over the edge of the bathtub to grab the back of my head. He brought my lips to his in an aggressive kiss. There was a lot of force put into it on his part, but I acted a little less enthusiastic; partially because I was too tired and partially because his little snap at me had managed to annoy me. “I’ll be downstairs if you need me, toots,” he stated as his gloved hand stroked my cheek and then proceeded to leaving the room.