Status: Be patient.
Lie to me
Do what you want
It was finally over. I thought to myself as I laid in Tony's bed holding back tears. After he was done he laid down facing the wall and fell asleep. I just laid there, staring at the ceiling not knowing what to do. I got up and put on all my clothes. I grabbed my school stuff and headed for the door, but as I opened it, it let out a loud creaking noise.
"What are you doing?" Tony said in a rude voice. I looked down at my stuff and back at him.
"Leaving?" I replied in a small voice. I looked at the clock sitting beside him and noticed it was only 9 o'clock. He put his head back down on the pillow and closed his eyes.
"Okay whatever. Just don't wake up my mom." He said in a half-awake voice. I couldn't help but be surprised.. What the hell?! "Oh, and Tara? We're over.. just in case you didn't realize." He said as he opened one eye, probably making sure I was still there, and he wouldn't have to break up with me again in a more public manner. "I mean, you're horrible in bed." he let out a small laugh and got more comfortable. I ran out of the room with tears running down my face.
It was 11 o'clock now, and I was still crying uncontrollably. My mom walked in to make sure I was okay a few times, but she didn't know what was going on. My mom was the kind of person who was always at work and never paid attention to her daughter. I wasn't about to start making a friendship with my mom. I was definitely not about to tell her how I spent my night. I guess she called Derek, because somehow he showed up and I didn't notice until he was standing in my door frame with a surprised look on his face.
"GET OUT!" I yelled at him without thinking. But instead, he ran towards me.
"Tara! What's wrong? Please, tell me what's wrong!" He said with a scared expression. He probably thought someone died or something.
"I'm s-sorrrry. I didn't want to d- do it! It just h-happe-" And I broke down into tears again. Since I was sitting with my back against my head board and my knees up to my chin, he hugged me in the best way that he could. He then moved his hands so that one was on my back and one was under my knees, and picked me up. He laid me down and laid down beside me. I laid there with our foreheads touching. I started to calm down, but was still crying.
"What happened Tara? What did you do?" He said with a concerned voice a few minutes later.
"Tooony. I-I went to his house a-after school and I-I didn't want to do it - " And the tears started again. "OH GOD! Derek, I made a mistake! I just l-laid there.. i didn't try to stop him or anything! It was so horrible!" I said as I broke down more then before. I didn't understand why I was crying so hard. I mean - after the time when Derek came and saved me from being raped, I always thought of him being my 'first'. But now I ruined everything, I felt horrible. Right after I finished talking though, Derek pushed off the bed and began pacing the room.
"You didn't. You wouldn't. I mean.." He stopped and looked me right in the eyes "You didn't, right? God, please, Tara. Tell me you didn't." There was so much hurt in his eyes. I felt as if I stabbed him in the heart. At the same time though, I think he felt that way as well.
"What are you doing?" Tony said in a rude voice. I looked down at my stuff and back at him.
"Leaving?" I replied in a small voice. I looked at the clock sitting beside him and noticed it was only 9 o'clock. He put his head back down on the pillow and closed his eyes.
"Okay whatever. Just don't wake up my mom." He said in a half-awake voice. I couldn't help but be surprised.. What the hell?! "Oh, and Tara? We're over.. just in case you didn't realize." He said as he opened one eye, probably making sure I was still there, and he wouldn't have to break up with me again in a more public manner. "I mean, you're horrible in bed." he let out a small laugh and got more comfortable. I ran out of the room with tears running down my face.
It was 11 o'clock now, and I was still crying uncontrollably. My mom walked in to make sure I was okay a few times, but she didn't know what was going on. My mom was the kind of person who was always at work and never paid attention to her daughter. I wasn't about to start making a friendship with my mom. I was definitely not about to tell her how I spent my night. I guess she called Derek, because somehow he showed up and I didn't notice until he was standing in my door frame with a surprised look on his face.
"GET OUT!" I yelled at him without thinking. But instead, he ran towards me.
"Tara! What's wrong? Please, tell me what's wrong!" He said with a scared expression. He probably thought someone died or something.
"I'm s-sorrrry. I didn't want to d- do it! It just h-happe-" And I broke down into tears again. Since I was sitting with my back against my head board and my knees up to my chin, he hugged me in the best way that he could. He then moved his hands so that one was on my back and one was under my knees, and picked me up. He laid me down and laid down beside me. I laid there with our foreheads touching. I started to calm down, but was still crying.
"What happened Tara? What did you do?" He said with a concerned voice a few minutes later.
"Tooony. I-I went to his house a-after school and I-I didn't want to do it - " And the tears started again. "OH GOD! Derek, I made a mistake! I just l-laid there.. i didn't try to stop him or anything! It was so horrible!" I said as I broke down more then before. I didn't understand why I was crying so hard. I mean - after the time when Derek came and saved me from being raped, I always thought of him being my 'first'. But now I ruined everything, I felt horrible. Right after I finished talking though, Derek pushed off the bed and began pacing the room.
"You didn't. You wouldn't. I mean.." He stopped and looked me right in the eyes "You didn't, right? God, please, Tara. Tell me you didn't." There was so much hurt in his eyes. I felt as if I stabbed him in the heart. At the same time though, I think he felt that way as well.