Take Me Down to Bat Country, My Synyster Queen

It was a wonderful December afternoon, Brian and I where curled up together, on the couch watching Season Two of Family Guy . Everyone was off doing their own thing, which is scary to even think about. " ♫ It seems today, that all you see is Violence in movies, and sex of TV......♪" Brian sang the opening song for Family Guy.
There was a rapid knock on the door, Brain gave me a quick kiss, then got up to open the door. "Michelle?!" Brian raised his eyebrow in disgust.
"Oh Brian, I'm sorry! I love you! Please take me back!" She wailed as she threw herself into his arms; whom rejected.
"Why?" He growled.
"Be—because I love you. I've missed you." She stammered.
“I don’t love you, Michelle. You may be Valery’s twin, but you’re nothing but a face to me. Get out.” He squinted his eyes in remorse.
“But….”
“Now!” He was livid. Michelle’s eyes averted to me.
“So….This is who you’ve chosen, this blonde Sullivan girl. Well I guess the Sullivan’s are much like the Haner’s. They date each other’s siblings….They—“
“Say one more word about mine and Brian’s family and I will knock your bleached teeth out.” I stood up with my fist clenched.
“Fine, I’ll leave, but this won’t be the last time you’ve seen me.” She let out a menacing cackle and disappeared out the door.
“What a bitch.” I scowled then sat back down.
“Guys! Guy! You’ve got to see this!” Johnny was frantically running down the stairs with his laptop in arms. “You’re not going to believe what they posted on ’Deathbat News!’’ He sat the laptop on the table.
’Synyster Gates has a new Harlot? What happened to Michelle and who is she? An insider says that she is also very close to A7X’s drummer Jimmy ‘The Rev’ Sullivan. Could she be courting with him as well? Does Synyster Gates know?’
Under the article was a picture of Brian and Jimmy throwing me into the ocean that day at the beach.
“Oh my god! That is so nasty! Jimmy and I? EW!” I screamed.
“The nerve of some fans; You know, it was probably those girls who were watching us at the beach.” Brian scowled.
“We are going to have to do some sort of damage control; for Jimmy’s, Erin’s and Cupcake’s sake.” Johnny shrugged.
“You’re right. I guess who we could do is introduce the girls on our next studio video.” Brian said.
“That would work.” Johnny smirked.
“I still can’t believe they think I fucked Jimmy!” I whined.
“That’s called incest honey.” Cupcake yawned as her and Jimmy walked down the stairs.
“No. Just read this article.” I pushed Johnny’s laptop towards the two. They two read it and both busted up laughing. “You think this is a laughing matter?” I scowled.
“Well yeah, it’s obvious that they don’t know who my wonderful sister is.” Jimmy wrapped his arm around my shoulder.
“Ewe! Jimmy! You’re all sweaty! Gross!” I pushed Jimmy’s arm off me and wiped the sweat off with his jacket.
“You’re welcome!” He said proudly.
“That’s nasty.” Brian shakes his head.
“So what do you guys want to do?” Cupcake smiled.
“Well, what I want to do is sit on this couch, eat Brian’s chips and watch TMZ.” Jimmy smirked; as he plopped his ass on the couch, grabbing the bag of chips and the remote off the coffee table, then turned on the TV to TMZ.
“Those are MY chips.” Brian glared. “Give them back!” He lunged himself at Jimmy, who was much faster, Jimmy rolled over the couch’s arm and crawled away from Brian with the back of chips between his teeth. Brian chased him around the living room for about five minutes, knocking over multiple of things. Jimmy ran up the stairs and slammed his door shut. “FINE! You can have my chips! But I’m having your Twinkies!” Brian giggled, then ran into the kitchen and came out with a box of Twinkies, that said ‘Don’t touch Jimmy’s Twinkie!’ In black Sharpie marker. He tore the box open and pulled out a Twinkie; he dropped the box onto the floor and walked back into the living room.
As soon as the tearing sound of the wrapper sounded through the room there was loud footsteps coming from upstairs, “My Twinkie!” Jimmy ran down the stairs yelling, he jumped on Brian’s back and they both tumbled down to the ground. “Bitch! That’s my Twinkie!”
“Bitch! You have my chips!” The sight of two grown men wrestling on the floor was unbelievable.
“OK! OK! I’ll give you back your chips if you give me back my Twinkie.” Jimmy whined. The two got up and ran up the stairs.
“Don’t forget to use a condom! You don’t want to get pregnant!” Cupcake called up the stairs. As soon as that was said, a tattooed hand protruded from behind the wall giving us the bird. “Oh I love you too!” Cupcake rolled her eyes and sat on the couch.
“Your boyfriend is a pain in my ass sometimes.” I told her.
“Hey! He’s your brother. They’re supposed to be a pain in the ass.” She shrugged.
“Matt and Zachy had just walked through the door with bags of groceries. “Hey guys! Jimmy I have your—“ I ran over to Matt and covered his mouth with my hand before he could finish saying it.
“Shh!” I glared at him, then took the brand new box of Twinkies out of the back and tore open the box; took one out, then sat on the couch to eat it. “Hey Cupcake!” I threw her a Twinkie as well.
By the time Jimmy and Brian came down stairs, we had finished almost the whole box. Jimmy and Brian sat on the love seat next to us. His eyes averted towards us, they narrowed, as he pointed his finger at us. “My Twinkies!” He stated. He sprung off the love seat and tackled us for the box of Twinkies.
“NO! You have Your Twinkies!” Cupcake yelled.
“But I want these Twinkies!” He tried to reach for the last two Twinkies but Cupcake and I stuffed one into each of our mouths.
“Now you don’t have any Twinkies!” Cupcake said, while trying to swallow.
“Zachary Baker! Touch those chips and you DIE!” Brian scolded. I look over to Zachy who was reaching into the bag for the chips. He retrieved his hand and pouted.
“Do I really want to know what you five did while we were gone?” Matt chuckled.
“No!” All five of us said in unison.
“Hi, Everybody!” Val called as she walked through the door with Lacey and Gena.
“So what’s the news?” Zachy asked.
“I have an ultrasound in two weeks. But other than that nothing spectacular.” Gena smiled.
“Sweet!” Jimmy cheered.
“Gosh! I’m so happy for you!” I giggled in delight.