After Tonight

“You look simply ravishing, love.” Rob grinned at me when I stepped out of the bedroom.
“You clean up pretty well yourself mate.” Whenever I spoke in a British accent, Rob cringed. I couldn’t understand why, I thought it was brilliant.
Since Rob would be overseas on our one year anniversary (yeah, I know), he decided to take me out to dinner and see a musical the day before he left. I got my jacket and purse, and headed to the door.
Before I could open it, Rob pressed his hand against it. His hot breath tickled my neck and he wrapped his arms around me.
“Do we have to go?” he whispered, trailing kisses down the back of my neck. “Or could we arrive fashionably late?” I giggled, melting under his touch.
“I don’t think we’d be missed…” I breathed, turning to face him and pressing my lips against the side of his face.
“Good.” His voice was hoarse as slid his long fingers down the fabric against my thighs.
“But,” I replied, abruptly grabbing his hands before they could tempt me any further. “We should eat before the show.” He groaned into my collarbone before bringing his lips to my ear.
“We’ll take a snack, love, please.” His clever fingers were once again playing with the hem of my dress.
“No.” My breathing was getting rugged but I managed to grab his hands once again.
My mind was beginning to cloud as I felt his lips brush my shoulder. He pinned my arms above my head and worked his way down. Was food really necessary? Who needed food when there was sex? I weighed my options.
“Do we even have tickets to the show?” I whispered, tangling my fingers in his mess of hair. He paused and flashed a grin at me, looking me square in the eyes.
“Maybe.” I rolled my eyes and couldn’t help but laugh. Rob laughed too, picking me up.
“You’re such a dick.” I laughed, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him.
“Interesting choice of words…” he smiled against my lips and carried me to the bedroom.
...
“I love your skin.” Rob kissed my bare back and smiled. He studied the tattoo on my back as he outlined it. “Did this hurt?”
“Nah. It’s only an outline. The one on my wrist did a little, apparently that’s the worst place to get it.”
When I was eighteen, I went out with my best friend Allie and got a tattoo of a dove on my back. I’d always had a thing for doves—even though I hated real ones—and it was our act of rebellion. The other tattoo, a small, flower design I’d drawn on a napkin at the bakery, came about after a drunken night with my sisters. I loved my tattoos; they were fun and they meant something to me—even the drunken one.
“Why don’t you get one?” I asked, rolling to face him. He made a face. Big spontaneous “bad boy” Rob was afraid to get a tattoo. “Scared?”
“Of course not!” Rob scoffed. “I just…don’t like needles…”
“Oh right. That’s not fear at all.” I traced the muscles on his arms. “Let’s get one! It’ll be our anniversary gifts.” Rob gave me a look, a look that turned to a stare.
“Well I already have your gift.” I quivered under his blue-eyed gaze. “I dunno why, one year isn’t anything to write home about…” I smacked him playfully.
“What’d you get me?”
Rob climbed out of bed, shaking his head at the catcalls I made about his naked bum. He stepped into some jeans and reached for a shirt.
“Is this a trick? My gift is you fully clothed?” I asked the tuft of hair poking out of the top of his shirt.
“Don’t get your knickers in a twist.” He smirked, pulling his shirt down. I had no knickers. “I’ll be back!”
…
Where on earth had he stashed my gift? After five minutes, I began to think he caught a cab to Macy’s. I laughed, getting out of bed to get dressed. Gifts weren’t important to me, but I loved the anticipation.
Rob still hadn’t returned so I hopped out of bed to put some clothes on. As I was pulling a shirt over my head, I heard the apartment door open. So much suspense had been built up that I had to pause from my dressing for a brief dance of excitement.
“What the hell are you doing?” Rob was standing in the doorway with an amused smile on his face.
“Stretching...” I answered sarcastically, pulled my arm across my chest.
“You’re excited.” he said matter-of-factly, smiling smugly.
“Were you expecting another emotion?” I asked, making my way over to him. “You know how much I love surprises.”
“Oh I do.”
“Should I close my eyes?” Rob had taken my hand and was leading me into the living room. “Did you cook a meal?” I asked, closing my eyes. “Because that would shock the hell out of me.”
“Abbey, open your eyes. I hate when people do that. It adds more suspense then what’s necessary.” Rob ordered, letting go of my hand with a chuckle.
“Fine.” I sighed, opening my eyes to look at him. And there was my surprise, sitting on our couch.
I screamed excitedly and ran over to the tiny Golden Retriever puppy. Ever since I could form a sentence I’d been asking for a dog and in twenty-five years I had never gotten one until now. As if making sure it was really there, I looked back at Rob just laughed and rolled his eyes.
“Oooooh Rob!” I grinned, picking up the little fur ball and making kissy-faces at him. Or her.
“I didn’t want you to get lonely.” Rob had stuffed his hands in his pockets and was idling by the coffee table. He smiled bashfully.
“Rob!” I felt like a little kid. “Oh!”
I sprawled out on the floor with the puppy facing me. It was so little and its head bobbed everywhere. He or she plopped down in front of me and started rolling around everywhere. I couldn’t help but giggle. Rob stretched out on his back next to me, letting the puppy run all over him.
“Do I have to give he/she away when you get back?” I asked solemnly, rubbing the dog’s ears as it tried its best to climb on top of Rob’s chest.
“Of course not.” Rob laughed. “And it’s a girl.”
“Rob I love her. Really.” I snuggled next to him, kissing face and then his lips.
“I knew you would.” He rested his head on folded arms and turned his face toward me. “And like I said earlier, I really don’t want you to get lonely.” Rob kissed me tenderly, ignoring the dog that was tugging on his shirt sleeve no doubt puncturing it.
Looking into his eyes, I could no longer hear the traffic outside. I couldn’t hear the dog whining from sudden neglect and I certainly couldn’t tell if that high pitched noise was the telephone or a fire alarm. Everything was foggy except for Rob and my own heartbeat.
“I don’t want to leave you.” Rob whispered these words delicately, as if I would shatter to pieces if he spoke any louder.
His eyes were wide and the crinkles in the corners of them became evident. I took notice of the dark circles underneath. Rob looked so worn, like something had been eating away at his insides and it had finally made its way to the outside. Distress had worn away his hard exterior and left insecurity in its place. If was like Rob wasn’t even there anymore; I was staring at a little boy, weak and afraid. It was the first time he looked human.
He was beautiful. I traced his jaw line, studying the look in his burning eyes. Words failed me. As my fingers tangled in his hair, Rob closed his eyes tight and inhaled deeply. Our breathing was even, his skin warm against mine.
“Rob—" My voice cracked slightly and he opened his eyes. “Let’s not make this harder than it is.” It hurt to hear myself say that when I wanted to hear how much he loved me, how much I meant to him.
“I know.” He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my throat. “But I wanted you to know that.” I pushed him away, ruining the moment.
“Are you trying to make me cry?” I asked, laughing at his bewildered expression. “I can’t take it!” Rob laughed now, pulling me against him again. He kissed my forehead in understanding.
…
Two hours later we still hadn’t named the puppy. I felt awful. She followed us around through every room, wagging her tail excitedly and looking at us with her droopy brown eyes. Rob was trying to finish up his packing and she kept stepping into his suitcase to lie down. I laughed as he shooed her away, only to find her sitting atop a pair of jeans seconds later. When we finally settled into bed, sometime around 1 a.m., Rob picked her up and let her sleep with us.
“We have to name her before I leave.”
“What about Bella?” I asked, nudging him jokingly.
“No.” He shook his head, rubbing No-Name’s ears. "Nope."