Suffering Alone In Silence

Frank’s POV

We are on my bed, still fully clothed, but hard as fuck and making out furiously. I am on top, pinning Gerard under me. He is running his hands up and down my sides. They travel up then down and over my ass, where he squeezes gently before running his hands back up my sides. This is so, so wrong. It feels too good to stop though. I can feel the beginnings of a hard on stirring in my pants. It has been so long since I felt like this. The thoughts of what happened to me flew through my mind at a rapid pace. It makes me dizzy. I pull away from Gerard. I sit back on Gerard and look at him.

“I...I can’t d-do this...I can’t do this Gerard.” I say.

It’s rushed, breathless and panicked.

“Oh god...oh god Frankie...I-I am so, so sorry.” Gerard replies.

His reply however, is calm, rational, yet so, so apologetic.

I climb off of him and go to the desk, pulling the chair out and placing it by the window.

“I-I...Can you please leave Gerard. Thank you for everything today...but I need to think for a bit. I’ll be out when I’m ready.” I say.

“Sure Frankie. It’s your room. If you don’t come out, I’ll come and get you for dinner, okay?” He replies.

I just nod my head. I take a seat once he has left and closed my door. I let the tears fall past my eyelashes. I sit and cry silently. I am not sure what to make of this anymore.

Dinner is quiet. No one makes conversation. Donna has so kindly made dinner, it’s just pasta and sauce but it tastes so damn good that I help myself to two serves.

“Would you like some dessert Frankie dear?” She asks, breaking the long silence since
dinner started.

“What’s that?” I ask, confused as to what she is asking.

“Pudding, y’know, ice cream and Oreo’s, it’s the boys’ favourite.” She smiles.

“Oh uhm, that sounds nice. Yes please.” I reply with a small smile.

She gets up and makes four bowls. One is placed in front of me and I dig in. It tastes like nothing I’ve ever had before.

Dinner is soon over and I go back to my room after thanking Donna for a good meal and asking if she wants help to clean up. She declines with a look telling me not to argue. I don’t, instead I just go up to my room.

I sit at the window and think. The window is big and gives me a great view of the backyard. It is clear that Donna likes to potter in the garden.

A soft knock at my door brings me out of my trance.

“Come in.” I say, not bothering to raise my voice.

“Hey Frankie,” It’s Gerard.

“Hey Gee.” I reply, turning to smile at him.

I get up from my seat at the window and go and sit next to him on my bed.

My heart races with excitement as we become closer to one another.

“Frankie...”My name escaping from his mouth as a sigh.

“Gee...” I whisper in reply.

Before I become aware of anything around us, Gerard has his lips pressed to mine. We start out slow. Gerard is simply showing me he means no harm. I reply timidly, ready to break away at the first sign of danger. My body goes rigid as Gerard moves his hand to my hip. My left hand tangles in the back of his head. Gerard’s tongue makes an appearance and licks along my bottom lip, asking for entry. I hesitate; Gerard feels it, waits for my reaction.
I open my mouth and let it in. The kiss becomes more heated, deeper. I tilt my head to the side and a heavy sigh, not quite a moan, escapes from the back of his throat. I give a soft sigh in reply, letting him know that it turns me on. I know this because I can feel the beginnings of an erection in my pants. Gerard’s other hand goes to my other hip and he lifts me up and places me on his lap.

No words are needed right now. Gerard moves away from my mouth and traces kisses from my mouth, to my jaw, and down to my neck, where he searches for that one spot he knows drives me crazy. He gets to just below my earlobe and I shiver, a low moan escaping from the back of my throat.

Gerard pauses.

“Hot.” He mumbles, in a low, dangerously sexy voice.

I reply with another moan. He smirks once more and goes back to that spot and sucks and bites and pleasures me. By now I am painfully hard and start to grind myself onto him.

“Gee...” I whisper.

He stops, looks at me, feel’s what I have going on and smirks that dangerously sexy smirk, that lets me know he feels the same way.

“Frankie, Lemme blow you. Put your faith in me, I’ll look after you.” He mumbles into my ear.

I simply nod in agreement, thinking that, yes Gerard I trust you with all I have left of my sad sorry life.