Please Save My Soul

When I walked into music I found that everyone was already there, Ray and Mikey were talking while Bob was napping, and Gerard was in another sketchbook. I walked over, my eyes watching him the entire time as I sat down. I had been thinking all morning, well all night how I was going to expose him. I only had this and art with him, so I didn’t really have many chances. I didn’t want to do it at his house in case it went horribly wrong. I mean I didn’t want to take the chance of him attacking me or Mikey, at school there would be more people, so I was probably safer.
“Hey, what’s up?” I looked over at Ray.
“Nothing, much, just tired.”
“Did you enjoy detention yesterday?” I couldn’t help the smirk that grew on my face.
“Yep.” I looked back over at Gerard who wasn’t looking up, but he wasn’t drawing either.
“Be right back.” I stood up, walking over to him and placed my hand on his shoulder, leaning down towards his ear.
“I know what you are Gerard, you can’t hide it from me.” I whispered, watching his grip on his pencil tighten.
“You don’t know anything.” his voice was hard.
“Believe what you want to believe.” with that I walked away. I felt like a total asshole, I just wanted him to have someone know so that was he wasn’t necessarily alone. But he had been a royal asshole to us, I felt it was only nice to return it. I walked back over to my chair and looked over at Bob who was still sleeping.
“Bobby... wake, now,” I pushed him with my foot, his head shot up and he looked around.
“Wha-...who woke me up?”
“I did,” I answered as the bell rang. I looked back over at Gerard who was looking at me intently.
“Hey, what did you do to him yesterday?” I looked at Mikey.
“What do you mean?”
“He was well... even weirder than usual when he got home from detention.”
“I might have torn up a sketchbook,” his eyes widened.
“Why the hell did you do that?”
“He was making fun of me.” I defended.
“You got him to talk?” I nodded.
“Well then, wow. More then just one or two word answers?” I nodded again. He looked over at his brother who was still watching me.
“You better watch it, he might attack you now.” he laughed, if only he knew how much that scared the shit out of me.

When it came time for art, I beginning to get desperate because I wanted to get this over with before the weekend, and I only had this class period left. I could try and catch him in the halls but I thought that to be a lost cause. I walked in the class and took my seat at the same table as Gerard who was already working on the painting of the fruits that were placed on our table. I sat my things down and went over to the cabinet grabbing my set of materials and headed back over placing them on the table and grabbed my painting from the rack. I sat down pulling out my paints and put some of each on my plate. I looked back over at Gerard who seemed to have all of his attention on his work, I don’t think he realized I was in. I put up the tubes when my eyes landed on the knife we sometimes used on our art. I glanced back over at Gerard who still paid no attention. I looked back at it, I was really desperate after all. I reached over grabbing it and pulled it out, admiring the blade in the clear plastic cover.
What are you doing?
I looked over at him, his eyes focused on the wax fruit. I pulled off the plastic and looked down at my hand, flexing it a few times, not sure if I wanted to do it. I knew that even though he might not have showed he was paying attention, he was. Without another thought I closed my eyes and pressed it against my palm and drug it across, the sharp stinging it created caused me to open my eyes and look at the blood that now began to seep through the wound. I dropped it on the table and looked over at him, his body rigid in his seat.
“Mr. Butcher,” I choked catching his attention, he walked over.
“Yes Frank?”
“It.. It got stuck, and when I pulled,” I opened my hand.
“Crap, wait right here,” he ran back and came out with a white rag.
“I can’t leave the class,” he looked over, “Gerard, would you mind taking him to the nurses office?” I looked over at Gerard, his eyes bore into mine, I could read the angered expression clear as day.
“Yes,” his tone was flat as he pushed back in his chair and stood up. I got up from my seat and followed him out, kicking the door shut with my foot as we walked down the hall. When we rounded a corner he grabbed me by the upper arm and shoved me into a closet, closing it behind him.
“What the fuck are you doing?!” he growled holding me up against the wall, his eyes were full blown red, nothing else could be seen. Around his eyes seemed to be darker, with a tint of the same shade red.
“I-I” my words tied to my throat.
“Was this your clever idea? Huh?! Is this what you fucking wanted Frank,” he spat, his fangs clear as day.
“I... just want, I want you to trust me.” I choked, now it didn’t seem like such a bright idea. He could kill me right now and it wouldn’t make a difference because he could make everyone think I never existed, or had died long ago.
“I was trying to protect you,” he growled, tightening his grip.
“You’re hurting me,” I winced, tears springing to my eyes.
“I told you Frank.... I tried to make you stop, but you wouldn’t listen.” his voice was hard.
“I know. I didn’t want to.”
“Why? Why the hell would you put yourself in such a position, where if I lost it, I could kill you,” there was sadness in his words.
“I don’t know. I just... I was desperate to get my point across.” I choked.
“It was an idiotic thing to do! Do you have any idea how hard it is to control? Do you?!” his voice raised again.
“I’m sorry Gerard, ok, I’m sorry. I just... I just wanted...”
“Wanted to do what?” he growled.
“I didn’t want you to have to be alone.”
“Alone?” he gave a sarcastic laugh.
“Yeah,” I breathed.
“I’ll always be alone Frank, always.”
“No, no you don’t. You can trust us, please just trust us?” his eyes slowly faded back to their normal look and he eased up on his grip.
“I’m trying to protect you from me, can’t you see that? You knew that, when you told me, I knew you understood, I thought you would understand that Frank. I’m dangerous,” he rambled in frustration, finally letting go and started to walk away.
“No,” I grabbed his arm, he stopped and turned around.
“I know, so what now? Are you going to mess with my brain, make me forget?”
“Maybe.” the sincerity in his tone scared me.
“Don’t, please don’t.” I choked, his hand met my bleeding one and he picked it up pulling away the bloodied rag. Letting out a shaky breath his eyes closed as he pressed it to his lips. My breathing grew rapid and my heart thudded against my chest.
“You have to promise me,” he mumbled, opening his eyes that showed me the same red from earlier.
“What do you want me to promise?” I stuttered, my hand still dangerously close to his face.
“You can’t tell anyone, if I let you remember, not a single person can find out.” his eyes met mine as they faded back to normalcy.
“Only if you promise me something.” I returned. He watched me for a few moments, I wondered if he was reading my thoughts.
“You want me to be more social.” yep I was right.
“It’s only fair, you don’t have to be the life of the party, but I mean, just talk to us. We miss you, especially Mikey,” his eyes softened on thought of his younger brother. He placed the rag back on my hand and pulled away.
“Come on,” he pulled me out of the closet and practically drug me down the hall.
“Gerard, will you promise me?”
“I’ll promise to try.” I would take that, it was better than a no. Soon we were in the front office and standing in front of the desk.
“I thought we were going to the nurse?” but he didn’t answer me because the lady came to the desk.
“Can I help you boys?”
“My friend hurt his hand, so we need to leave now. Sign us out,” he stated calmly.
“Gerard what...” I stopped when he looked at me, that familiar look in his eyes made me realize what he was doing. He looked back at her, her eyes transfixed on him, she nodded filling out a slip and handed it to him in a dulled manner. With that he lead me back out and down the hall.
“Wait out here, I’ll be right back.” I nodded standing outside the classroom as he went in, soon he returned with our things.
“Let’s go then.” we stopped off at our lockers and put our things away before getting in his car.
“Let me see your hand,” I looked over at him.
“Is–is that a good idea, I mean, you know?” he put out his hand, I laid it in his and he pulled the rag away looking at it. He picked up his other hand and bit into his palm before pressing it to mine. I watched intently, feeling a warm sensation along the cut.
“What are you doing?” I mumbled, as he pulled his away I looked at the blood.
“It’ll heal quicker now and it won’t get infected.” he placed the rag back over it and started up the car.
“Are you taking me to the hospital?” he shook his head.
“You won’t need stitches. I’m taking you to my house, or your house if you prefer.”
“Why?” I was completely clueless.
“If you know what I am, I guess it’s best you know what happened right?” I looked at him and nodded. I was finally going to hear his story.