To Live Her Life
Months 5-10
Month 5
Océane had been learning Ukrainian rapidly with both tutoring from Mayine and the neighbor woman Ylana (Yah-lawn-ah). If anything else she felt she owed it to him… She would find out what happened. She couldn’t forget him, and she often cried herself to sleep at night when both Aleia and Ibrahim both asked where their daddy was; and by daddy, they meant Youri. It wasn’t even one of those I miss biological mama or daddy. They had really gotten attached within the past few months.
Youri’s leg has gotten better; he still wears a brace but is able to almost jog around. He’s gotten stronger, but at the same time starting to really dwindle away in his emotions. He’s hardened his emotions from everyone, putting up a shield of false pretense of tough outer exterior. He’s virtually let himself go, not only acting differently but also roughed up some on his once boyish looks. His hair has gotten darker, facial hair started to come in darker (with a bit of help from the months of not shaving regularly), his skin has gotten lighter with the wintry months and prior starvation-like treatment while as hostage but he has bulked up and came into form with his extensive 6-foot-something height.
Youri’s nose scrunched up as the strong alcohol burned down the back of his mouth and throat. The large glass was held lightly at the end of his fingertips as he slammed it down on the table before him; he winced at the after bite, a very dry almost in a sense putrid taste- The alcohol had been smuggled into the barracks and he and a few others sat drinking the very old, very bad tasting liquid. It had been frozen and thawed most likely many times before they had gotten a hold of it.
He coughed as the other men chuckled at his very dramatic response; they hadn’t tasted the concoction yet.
“Ах ну, вона не може бути так погано малюк!” (Oh come on; it can’t be that bad kid!) Conveniently, it was a kid younger than Youri who spoke those words. Youri made sure to make that known between the group sooner rather than later.
“Хто це ти називаєш біса малюк, ти просто гортати дитини!” (Who’re you callin’ a fucking kid; you’re just a flippin baby!) Youri burst out in an already started drunken slur. Everyone laughed with Youri’s outburst, and that “kid” just stared intently at him, glaring him down. If looks could kill, Youri would be dead in that moment.
This went on for a good hour or so until the whole champagne-sized bottle was distributed and in the bellies of the 4 men sat around the small table in the corner of the wide opened, darkened room.
Youri stood and stumbled forwards and then swayed to and frow on his feet; the room span like a tornado and made him groan before bringing a hand up to his achy forehead.
“Куди ти йдеш?” (Where you going?) ; came out in a slur from one of the men. Youri didn’t respond verbally; all he did was take a few shaky steps forwards towards the exit in the building.
“Юрій!” Another yelled after him; he had gotten a feel for his feet again and walked at a brisker pace now-
“Юрій! Куди ти йдеш-?” (Youri! Where are you going-?) The last guy yelled out with a chuckle.
He only continued stumbling forward in a semi zig-zagging movement out of the building and eventually getting to the front opening of the commanders quarters. No one will ever understand why he ended up there, but he had-
-
Month 7
Océane was beginning to forget Youri’s face, his smell, the feel of being safe whenever he was around. Hell, even when he wasn’t there she knew he’d be there for her and at least have the courage to come back no matter what. She was beyond puzzled thinking about his sudden disappearance. She began to question herself as well as the man that has ultimately stolen her heart and smashed it to pieces.
Aleia and Ibrahim had been picking Ukrainian as well; all Océane speaks now is the butchered language she has been learning. It’s one thing to learn a second language, but is completely different to try and use it in everyday life beyond basic vocabulary words and flash-cards. Using it had made her better able to attempt the foreign language that was much, much different from her own.
As a result, Ylana’s little nieces and nephews have become fast friends with the twins.
Océane and Mayine were still the outcasts in the little town; everyone knew everyone but no one wanted to really get involved with 2 foreign illegal immigrants and “their 2 little kids.”
Mayine had gotten beat up and ganged up upon quite a few young Ukrainian men in probably only their mid-20 at the most. Meanwhile, he hasn’t been dealing with the criticism and bulling very well at all.
Mayine stumbled into the little 4 room total apartment/condo. Océane stood at the stove stirring a little pot of left over red kidney bean and curry soup; a dish that was simple and cheap for their very limited income. It was late at night, nearing 2 am in the current timezone, and she had made the twins go to bed a good many hours before.
The house had been previously deathly silent; so of course when the front door opens nearly right into someone, of course they will look at the figure making their way inside. Intruder or not, it’s just a simple automatic reaction. Océane’s eyes met those of a bleeding, hunched over Mayine. The loose t-shirt hung off his body in pools off his broad shoulders; same with his thin jacket over top, only this item of clothing at least fit him better to ensure warmth.
“Що?” (What?) She let the soup go and moved a few steps towards him, blinking and taking in his damaged face and bleeding, limping body. She reached out and he slapped her hand away with a low, angry growl- the last thing she expected of him in the current situation.
“يصمت ويتركني وحيدا كنت الكلبة قليلا!” (Shut up and leave me alone you little bitch!) He snapped in their native tongue just to cut her even deeper. She whimpered and moved out of the way as he stalked past and into the single bedroom, slamming the door in the process. The whole house seemed to shake with the sudden outburst in noise and force behind the slam; Both Ibrahim and Aleia woke up from their beds in the semi- enclosed living room area.
With tears in her eyes, Océane wondered what she had done wrong; why he snapped at her like he had. Their relationship hasn’t been the best the prior few days but she didn’t think it was as bad as it obviously was as evidenced by what had just happened. She wiped furiously at her wet eyes as she heared two little feet run into the kitchen, their skin against the wood making a lowly pitter-pattering sound the closer they got. She bent down and met them as she sat on her heels, hugging both of their little bodies to her own likewise smaller figure.
-
Month 8
Océane had understood and accepted Youri’s disappearance. She missed him but after 8 long months she was slowly forgetting him. Mayine kept becoming meaner and meaner; reminding her much of what happened the last time Youri left her alone with his…people. Only here, she was the odd girl out in the thousands and thousands all living around her at various distances within the country.
Youri had been caught 3 times while being intoxicated; yet nothing ever came from any of it. He hadn’t gotten in trouble and all this “”publicity” had really done was get him more “in’s” with how to get even more alcohol. By now the taste wasn’t bothering him; he could drink almost 3 times as much before getting “drunk” and he was never on a “low” he always seemed to be buzzed.
He’s changed-
“Ти ідіот!” (You’re an idiot!) Demetrio yelled as Youri held a thin, square-flask bottle up to his mouth. After taking a long, big swig, he looked back at Demetrio’s body in the distance. He wasn’t too far, but he was far enough away to look like a silhouette in the night sky; a spinning silhouette nonetheless. “Я знаю, ти мене чуєш!” (I know you can hear me!) Demetrio started to walk briskly after him, catching up with him easily. “Юрій!” (Youri!) Demetrio had caught up to him and then went to grab him, so that he could look Youri in his eyes; try and figure out what he was trying to do.
“Залиште мене ебут тільки Деметріо!” (Leave. Me the fuck alone, Demetrio!) Youri screamed shrugging Demetrio’s hold on his shoulder, off of him. He flinched very noticeably away as he stumbled; but he didn’t fall. He took one more step before freezing-
“Ви змінилися, вона звичай знати вас більше. Вона хіба сподобається ця "нова" Ви, ви знаєте, що?” (You have changed, she won’t know you anymore. She isn't going to like this "new" you; you know that?) Youri turned around and glared at the shorter man in a sense of sadness. “Все, що ви це п'яний.” (All you are is a drunk.)
“То не ...” (That’s not) He paused mid sentence and hiccuped “…правда” (true).
“Я., це так! Подивіться в дзеркало біса Юрію! Навіть якщо ви знайдете її і побачити її знову, вона звичай давати два лайно про ваш п'яний осел я!” (Ya, it is! Take a look in the fucking mirror Youri! Even if you do find her and see her again, she won’t give two shits about your drunken ass self!) Demetrio screamed in Youri’s blank and paled face; he was in shock and awe he would ever say such a thing ‘It isn’t true, is it?’ He questioned himself in his mind.
-
Month 10
Youri got released for a brief month vacation after his year of service; it was something standard now with the war going on. A month for rest and spending the precious time with family and friends; you never could be too sure of how things will happen and end out there on the battlefield.
He walked off the bus, still in his uniform, and grabbed his duffel from the compartment underneath the bus’s side. He looked around, being sober for the first time in the last couple months. His head pounded with the brightness emitting from the sun; he caught sight of his little sister and mother. Both seemed to have grown older in a year’s time, but he smiled at their familiar faces before walking towards their rushing figures. His mother grabbed him and hugged him extremely tightly; for a petite older woman, she was quite strong- which reminded him for that moment, of Océane.
He sighed being driven up the driveway to his childhood home. His mother was in the driver’s seat, him the passenger while his little sister in the back; both women grinning from ear to ear. He wasn’t too happy though; getting out on vacation just made him feel more depressed with the thoughts that resurfaced. Before, working and drinking swept all his thoughts clean; there weren’t any thoughts, wasn’t anything to second guess or wonder about, he just did his job and did it well. Or as well as he could be working when drunken and clumsy.
The car came to a stop and he opened the door, stepping out and onto the leaf covered ground. He kicked a few around as he shuffled lazily towards the truck to retrieve his duffel bag. He turned and stared numbly at the enormous house in front of him; he sighed before shifting his gaze over to his awaiting mother, who stood there all giddy-like and happy. He was NOT happy in the least bit of the sense.
“Ласкаво просимо додому, Юрію!” (Welcome home Youri!) His family yelled as he walked into the house; the whole family was present for a Sunday dinner. A tradition of every Sunday, only this time was more special because Youri was back.
He greeted everyone individually, briefly, before excusing himself to his room to get cleaned up and rested a bit before dinner.
In reality, he just needed to get away to get tipsy again; he knew where his parent kept the alcohol and besides, he was legal- its not like he was going to get in trouble if he was caught, but he also didn’t want to be.
He sat on his bed, bottle of Jack in his palm taking big swigs out of it.
“Там ви ...” (There you are… ) His father had peaked inside and then let the door slowly creak open on its hinges with a little nudge. He walked in, also still in uniform, and stood against a wall.Youri ignored him. He blamed his father for getting him into this mess. “Як ся маєте? Як справи на базі?” (How are you? How are things on base?)
“Добре. І я не приділяють достатньої уваги біса ноу- “(Fine. And I don't pay enough attention to fucking know-) He was cut off with a warning from his father.
“Ви Слідкуйте за своїми словами!” (You watch your mouth!)
“Чому?! Ха, це хіба мами, як тут, чи Ані або кого-небудь, його тільки ти і я так, що велика справа гребаной!” (Why?! Huh, it isn't like moms here, or Ani or anyone; it’s just you and me so what is the big fucking deal!?) He snapped back, glaring at his father. “Я втомився від отримання лайно з усіх про все!” (I'm sick and tired of getting shit from everybody about everything!) Youri nearly screamed out in frustration and fury. “Я не можу взяти це більше-“ (I cant take it anymore-) With that said, he stood up with bottle in hand and walked out the door of his bedroom brushing harshly past his father.
“Куди ти йдеш?” (Where are you going?)
“Я не знаю, десь ... де завгодно, тільки не тут!” (I don’t know somewhere… anywhere but HERE!) He screamed this time.
“Ви не можете цього зробити, у вас є відповідальність за вашу сім'ю, ваші матері і-“ (You can’t do this, you have a responsibility to your family; your mother and-)
“Мені все одно.” (I don’t care.) He cut off his father mid sentence, but that didn’t cause him to stop any. It was as though he wasn’t even interrupted at all…
“... Ваша країна! Вам доведеться повернутися коли-небудь!” (…your country! You’ll have to come back sometime!)
“Ні, я до біса звичка!” (No I fucking won’t!) Youri scoffed in his mind.
“Ви не можете просто відмовитися, щось не wotk так!” (You can’t just opt out, things don’t wotk that way!) His father yelled stomping down the steps after him, hot on his heels too.
“дивитися на мене!” (Watch me.) Youri snapped slamming the open door behind him, in his fathers face. He had no more than his wallet and the clothes on his back but he didn’t care. He could care less as long as he got out; got away. If only for a month, it was a month he didn’t have before- he would find her if it killed him.
Meanwhile Océane was at her breaking point; way past it actually. Back to square one…
Océane had been learning Ukrainian rapidly with both tutoring from Mayine and the neighbor woman Ylana (Yah-lawn-ah). If anything else she felt she owed it to him… She would find out what happened. She couldn’t forget him, and she often cried herself to sleep at night when both Aleia and Ibrahim both asked where their daddy was; and by daddy, they meant Youri. It wasn’t even one of those I miss biological mama or daddy. They had really gotten attached within the past few months.
Youri’s leg has gotten better; he still wears a brace but is able to almost jog around. He’s gotten stronger, but at the same time starting to really dwindle away in his emotions. He’s hardened his emotions from everyone, putting up a shield of false pretense of tough outer exterior. He’s virtually let himself go, not only acting differently but also roughed up some on his once boyish looks. His hair has gotten darker, facial hair started to come in darker (with a bit of help from the months of not shaving regularly), his skin has gotten lighter with the wintry months and prior starvation-like treatment while as hostage but he has bulked up and came into form with his extensive 6-foot-something height.
Youri’s nose scrunched up as the strong alcohol burned down the back of his mouth and throat. The large glass was held lightly at the end of his fingertips as he slammed it down on the table before him; he winced at the after bite, a very dry almost in a sense putrid taste- The alcohol had been smuggled into the barracks and he and a few others sat drinking the very old, very bad tasting liquid. It had been frozen and thawed most likely many times before they had gotten a hold of it.
He coughed as the other men chuckled at his very dramatic response; they hadn’t tasted the concoction yet.
“Ах ну, вона не може бути так погано малюк!” (Oh come on; it can’t be that bad kid!) Conveniently, it was a kid younger than Youri who spoke those words. Youri made sure to make that known between the group sooner rather than later.
“Хто це ти називаєш біса малюк, ти просто гортати дитини!” (Who’re you callin’ a fucking kid; you’re just a flippin baby!) Youri burst out in an already started drunken slur. Everyone laughed with Youri’s outburst, and that “kid” just stared intently at him, glaring him down. If looks could kill, Youri would be dead in that moment.
This went on for a good hour or so until the whole champagne-sized bottle was distributed and in the bellies of the 4 men sat around the small table in the corner of the wide opened, darkened room.
Youri stood and stumbled forwards and then swayed to and frow on his feet; the room span like a tornado and made him groan before bringing a hand up to his achy forehead.
“Куди ти йдеш?” (Where you going?) ; came out in a slur from one of the men. Youri didn’t respond verbally; all he did was take a few shaky steps forwards towards the exit in the building.
“Юрій!” Another yelled after him; he had gotten a feel for his feet again and walked at a brisker pace now-
“Юрій! Куди ти йдеш-?” (Youri! Where are you going-?) The last guy yelled out with a chuckle.
He only continued stumbling forward in a semi zig-zagging movement out of the building and eventually getting to the front opening of the commanders quarters. No one will ever understand why he ended up there, but he had-
-
Month 7
Océane was beginning to forget Youri’s face, his smell, the feel of being safe whenever he was around. Hell, even when he wasn’t there she knew he’d be there for her and at least have the courage to come back no matter what. She was beyond puzzled thinking about his sudden disappearance. She began to question herself as well as the man that has ultimately stolen her heart and smashed it to pieces.
Aleia and Ibrahim had been picking Ukrainian as well; all Océane speaks now is the butchered language she has been learning. It’s one thing to learn a second language, but is completely different to try and use it in everyday life beyond basic vocabulary words and flash-cards. Using it had made her better able to attempt the foreign language that was much, much different from her own.
As a result, Ylana’s little nieces and nephews have become fast friends with the twins.
Océane and Mayine were still the outcasts in the little town; everyone knew everyone but no one wanted to really get involved with 2 foreign illegal immigrants and “their 2 little kids.”
Mayine had gotten beat up and ganged up upon quite a few young Ukrainian men in probably only their mid-20 at the most. Meanwhile, he hasn’t been dealing with the criticism and bulling very well at all.
Mayine stumbled into the little 4 room total apartment/condo. Océane stood at the stove stirring a little pot of left over red kidney bean and curry soup; a dish that was simple and cheap for their very limited income. It was late at night, nearing 2 am in the current timezone, and she had made the twins go to bed a good many hours before.
The house had been previously deathly silent; so of course when the front door opens nearly right into someone, of course they will look at the figure making their way inside. Intruder or not, it’s just a simple automatic reaction. Océane’s eyes met those of a bleeding, hunched over Mayine. The loose t-shirt hung off his body in pools off his broad shoulders; same with his thin jacket over top, only this item of clothing at least fit him better to ensure warmth.
“Що?” (What?) She let the soup go and moved a few steps towards him, blinking and taking in his damaged face and bleeding, limping body. She reached out and he slapped her hand away with a low, angry growl- the last thing she expected of him in the current situation.
“يصمت ويتركني وحيدا كنت الكلبة قليلا!” (Shut up and leave me alone you little bitch!) He snapped in their native tongue just to cut her even deeper. She whimpered and moved out of the way as he stalked past and into the single bedroom, slamming the door in the process. The whole house seemed to shake with the sudden outburst in noise and force behind the slam; Both Ibrahim and Aleia woke up from their beds in the semi- enclosed living room area.
With tears in her eyes, Océane wondered what she had done wrong; why he snapped at her like he had. Their relationship hasn’t been the best the prior few days but she didn’t think it was as bad as it obviously was as evidenced by what had just happened. She wiped furiously at her wet eyes as she heared two little feet run into the kitchen, their skin against the wood making a lowly pitter-pattering sound the closer they got. She bent down and met them as she sat on her heels, hugging both of their little bodies to her own likewise smaller figure.
-
Month 8
Océane had understood and accepted Youri’s disappearance. She missed him but after 8 long months she was slowly forgetting him. Mayine kept becoming meaner and meaner; reminding her much of what happened the last time Youri left her alone with his…people. Only here, she was the odd girl out in the thousands and thousands all living around her at various distances within the country.
Youri had been caught 3 times while being intoxicated; yet nothing ever came from any of it. He hadn’t gotten in trouble and all this “”publicity” had really done was get him more “in’s” with how to get even more alcohol. By now the taste wasn’t bothering him; he could drink almost 3 times as much before getting “drunk” and he was never on a “low” he always seemed to be buzzed.
He’s changed-
“Ти ідіот!” (You’re an idiot!) Demetrio yelled as Youri held a thin, square-flask bottle up to his mouth. After taking a long, big swig, he looked back at Demetrio’s body in the distance. He wasn’t too far, but he was far enough away to look like a silhouette in the night sky; a spinning silhouette nonetheless. “Я знаю, ти мене чуєш!” (I know you can hear me!) Demetrio started to walk briskly after him, catching up with him easily. “Юрій!” (Youri!) Demetrio had caught up to him and then went to grab him, so that he could look Youri in his eyes; try and figure out what he was trying to do.
“Залиште мене ебут тільки Деметріо!” (Leave. Me the fuck alone, Demetrio!) Youri screamed shrugging Demetrio’s hold on his shoulder, off of him. He flinched very noticeably away as he stumbled; but he didn’t fall. He took one more step before freezing-
“Ви змінилися, вона звичай знати вас більше. Вона хіба сподобається ця "нова" Ви, ви знаєте, що?” (You have changed, she won’t know you anymore. She isn't going to like this "new" you; you know that?) Youri turned around and glared at the shorter man in a sense of sadness. “Все, що ви це п'яний.” (All you are is a drunk.)
“То не ...” (That’s not) He paused mid sentence and hiccuped “…правда” (true).
“Я., це так! Подивіться в дзеркало біса Юрію! Навіть якщо ви знайдете її і побачити її знову, вона звичай давати два лайно про ваш п'яний осел я!” (Ya, it is! Take a look in the fucking mirror Youri! Even if you do find her and see her again, she won’t give two shits about your drunken ass self!) Demetrio screamed in Youri’s blank and paled face; he was in shock and awe he would ever say such a thing ‘It isn’t true, is it?’ He questioned himself in his mind.
-
Month 10
Youri got released for a brief month vacation after his year of service; it was something standard now with the war going on. A month for rest and spending the precious time with family and friends; you never could be too sure of how things will happen and end out there on the battlefield.
He walked off the bus, still in his uniform, and grabbed his duffel from the compartment underneath the bus’s side. He looked around, being sober for the first time in the last couple months. His head pounded with the brightness emitting from the sun; he caught sight of his little sister and mother. Both seemed to have grown older in a year’s time, but he smiled at their familiar faces before walking towards their rushing figures. His mother grabbed him and hugged him extremely tightly; for a petite older woman, she was quite strong- which reminded him for that moment, of Océane.
He sighed being driven up the driveway to his childhood home. His mother was in the driver’s seat, him the passenger while his little sister in the back; both women grinning from ear to ear. He wasn’t too happy though; getting out on vacation just made him feel more depressed with the thoughts that resurfaced. Before, working and drinking swept all his thoughts clean; there weren’t any thoughts, wasn’t anything to second guess or wonder about, he just did his job and did it well. Or as well as he could be working when drunken and clumsy.
The car came to a stop and he opened the door, stepping out and onto the leaf covered ground. He kicked a few around as he shuffled lazily towards the truck to retrieve his duffel bag. He turned and stared numbly at the enormous house in front of him; he sighed before shifting his gaze over to his awaiting mother, who stood there all giddy-like and happy. He was NOT happy in the least bit of the sense.
“Ласкаво просимо додому, Юрію!” (Welcome home Youri!) His family yelled as he walked into the house; the whole family was present for a Sunday dinner. A tradition of every Sunday, only this time was more special because Youri was back.
He greeted everyone individually, briefly, before excusing himself to his room to get cleaned up and rested a bit before dinner.
In reality, he just needed to get away to get tipsy again; he knew where his parent kept the alcohol and besides, he was legal- its not like he was going to get in trouble if he was caught, but he also didn’t want to be.
He sat on his bed, bottle of Jack in his palm taking big swigs out of it.
“Там ви ...” (There you are… ) His father had peaked inside and then let the door slowly creak open on its hinges with a little nudge. He walked in, also still in uniform, and stood against a wall.Youri ignored him. He blamed his father for getting him into this mess. “Як ся маєте? Як справи на базі?” (How are you? How are things on base?)
“Добре. І я не приділяють достатньої уваги біса ноу- “(Fine. And I don't pay enough attention to fucking know-) He was cut off with a warning from his father.
“Ви Слідкуйте за своїми словами!” (You watch your mouth!)
“Чому?! Ха, це хіба мами, як тут, чи Ані або кого-небудь, його тільки ти і я так, що велика справа гребаной!” (Why?! Huh, it isn't like moms here, or Ani or anyone; it’s just you and me so what is the big fucking deal!?) He snapped back, glaring at his father. “Я втомився від отримання лайно з усіх про все!” (I'm sick and tired of getting shit from everybody about everything!) Youri nearly screamed out in frustration and fury. “Я не можу взяти це більше-“ (I cant take it anymore-) With that said, he stood up with bottle in hand and walked out the door of his bedroom brushing harshly past his father.
“Куди ти йдеш?” (Where are you going?)
“Я не знаю, десь ... де завгодно, тільки не тут!” (I don’t know somewhere… anywhere but HERE!) He screamed this time.
“Ви не можете цього зробити, у вас є відповідальність за вашу сім'ю, ваші матері і-“ (You can’t do this, you have a responsibility to your family; your mother and-)
“Мені все одно.” (I don’t care.) He cut off his father mid sentence, but that didn’t cause him to stop any. It was as though he wasn’t even interrupted at all…
“... Ваша країна! Вам доведеться повернутися коли-небудь!” (…your country! You’ll have to come back sometime!)
“Ні, я до біса звичка!” (No I fucking won’t!) Youri scoffed in his mind.
“Ви не можете просто відмовитися, щось не wotk так!” (You can’t just opt out, things don’t wotk that way!) His father yelled stomping down the steps after him, hot on his heels too.
“дивитися на мене!” (Watch me.) Youri snapped slamming the open door behind him, in his fathers face. He had no more than his wallet and the clothes on his back but he didn’t care. He could care less as long as he got out; got away. If only for a month, it was a month he didn’t have before- he would find her if it killed him.
Meanwhile Océane was at her breaking point; way past it actually. Back to square one…
♠ ♠ ♠
Unforseen occurances befall us all; aint that the truth? I was supposed to post on Tuesday... not i guess it would be considered Saturday (I'm still in Friday mode and havent slept yet and wont for quite a while, anyways) So sorry for the wait guys.Subscribe please. Also afterwards, if you wanna comment please do!