Poison

The wedding only took about six months to plan; by then I was eighteen and it was nearly June – beautiful and bad timing. The Bamboozle Roadshow was starting – so as of May 20th me and Jack we’re married. A white dressed with a orange sash that trailed down to the floor and Jack in a black suit and a orange tie. Jack’s brother Joe was his best man – along with Alex, Rian and Zack as his best men. My maids were Lisa, May, Cassadee and Bella – a friend I had made while shopping for dresses three months before the wedding. She was amazingly not an All Time Low fan when I met her, which made her truly unique.

“I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Jack Bassam Barakat – you may kiss the bride,” I smiled deeply at Jack as he leaned in closely to me and closed his eyes. Is it weird that I didn’t close my eyes till the very last second? I just wanted to see it all before it ended I guess. Before as always – Every good thing has to end eventually.

[>>>]

Of course there wasn’t going to be a really honeymoon. Unless you count traveling around on a tour bus with three stinky guys who aren’t your husband and one stinky guy who is. Though, at least we got one wild night at home before tour started. If I remember correctly; there was no sleep, just sex and running around and jumping around on the furniture; oh and chocolate syrup – you can’t forget the syrup.

I believe we were leaving Tampa when I started feeling sick and not just woozy kind of sick – vomiting until I’m dead kind of sick and that’s pretty much what happened. I was stuck in that tiny bathroom for an hour, hunched over the toilet and flushing every other minute like clockwork. This repeated everyday for about a week.

We were in Bonner Springs, Kansas when Jack forced me to go to the hospital starting that I had to have, “Swine Flue or something worse.” That in mind we sat waiting in a triage room waiting for the doctor to come back with my test results from the blood they took half an hour ago.

I began to wonder about what could be wrong, “Jack…?”

“What is it?” His voice was on edge and filled with worry. I always knew Jack loved me but this – what was about to happen was what he would always love more than me and that; well, is what I should’ve always expected from him.

“The doctor’s here,” I pointed up behind to where a pretty blonde in white coat was standing going though a clipboard. She shook our hands and introduced herself as Doctor. Eliot Reed. She had a nice smile and said that nothing was out of the ordinary but I should eat a little bit healthier –

“-Because you’re pregnant,” Her smile, if it could got bigger. My mouth dropped open and I shifted my shocked gaze from Dr. Reed to Jack who had the biggest smile ever on his face. I had never seen him look so happy; not when we met, not when he said I love you – not when he proposed – not ever.

I opened my mouth to ask how far along I was but the point was mute because Jack already asked it and Dr. Reed was already answering it – “Three months! Congratulations; I’m sorry, but I have to go – I’ll just leave this prescription to help you with your morning sickness.”

And with that Doctor Eliot Reed was gone. I was still shocked but Jack was busy being on the phone calling the family and the guys and everyone else he could think of – It was tweeted of course, in Jack’s crude way of saying things ‘expecting a package in six months – stork is delivering’

Babies are beautiful, full of joy and bring so much happiness to those that have they and met them and see them. But to those that lose them; life is not worth living. It is in fact the complete opposite. Life is worthless and pitiful without your child. It may even drive you so mad that you would want to kill the very thing that brought your beloved child into this world.