Shotgun Sinners
Chapter 5
another epically pointless chapter by Olivia. cos i'm bored to the 74369th power.
Olivia's POV
"PWNED, SON!!" I shrieked in Ray's face as Bob kicked his butt at Guitar Hero [yet again]. He growled at me. "Wait...RAY! YOU PLAY GUITAR! AND BOB DOESN'T!" I yelled.
"SO WHAT?!?" he yelled back.
"SO HOW COME HE BEAT YOU BY LIKE 50 BAJILLION POINTS? AGAIN?!?" I screamed.
"BECAUSE RAY SUCKS AT THIS GAME!! AND I AM GOD OF GUITAR HERO!!" Bob yelled.
"YOU IDIOTS! WHY ARE YOU YELLING! YOU GUYS ARE LESS THAN THREE FEET APART!!" Chelsea shrieked at us. "PUT DOWN THE FREAKING GUITAR CRAP AND COME EAT THE PIZZA!!!"
We looked at each other, shrugged, and ran for the kitchen. I put three slices of cheese pizza on a plate, set it on the counter, and started rummaging through the cupboards, looking for the magical jar of deliciousness. I know it's here somewhere...
Meghan looked at me oddly. "What'cha looking for?"
"Stuff," I replied, my voice muffled as I was halfway inside a cupboard.
"Stuff?" she repeated dubiously [best word everr].
"Stuff," Frank confirmed.
"What stuff?" she wanted to know.
"Pizza stuff," Alex said knowingly.
"What kind of pizza stuff?" Meghan persisted.
"The Olivia kind of pizza stuff," Bob said, as if that should be obvious.
"And the Olivia kind of pizza stuff is...what?" she asked, getting a bit exasperated.
"FOUND IT!!" I shrieked, then realized I had a problem. "FRANK!!" I squealed. "HELP ME!!"
"Uhh...help you with what?" he asked confuzzledly.
"MY FAT ASS IS STUCK IN THE CUPBOARD DOOR!!" I giggled.
The kitchen burst into laughter. Frank pulled on my feet until I got un-stuck, and I scrambled out of the cupboard, clutching my treasure.
"Pizza stuff!" I announced proudly, and started transforming my pizza. Twizzlers. Skittles. Gummy bears. Chocolate syrup. Everything imaginable went onto that pizza, changing it from boring old cheese pizza to The Greatest Culinary Achievement Known To Humankind.
Meghan looked as if she was going to be sick. "And she actually eats that??" she asked Bob in disbelief.
"Every last bite," he assured her.
"Eeeew." Meghan wrinkled her nose.
I hissed. "Don't insult the Magical Food of the Olivia."
"Yes master," she bowed, giggling.
After we had all got our food and were settled in front of the TV, we had to decide what movie to watch.
"MEN IN TIGHTS!!" I squealed. That movie is fricking hilarious.
"Noooo! Jackass!!" Ray argued.
I pouted, and Frank pulled me in for a hug. "Don't call her names!" Frank barked at Ray.
"I wasn't!" the Fro-man protested. "I meant Jackass, as in, the movie! Y'know, with Johnny Knoxville!"
"Ohhh," Frank and I said, feeling slightly dumb.
"OH EM GEE!!!" Chelsea squealed. "WE SHALL WATCH DONNIE DARKO!!"
"YEAH!!!" everyone agreed, and Mikey went to put it in the DVD player.
--Time Lapse--
"That is the LAST time we are watching that movie with Olivia," Chelsea groaned, prying my fingers off of her arm.
"I agree. Never again," Frank nodded, inspecting the finger-shaped bruises on his arm.
"Sorry..." I whimpered. "It's that fucking bunny, dude. He scares mee."
Frank hugged me. "Still. You are NEVER watching that movie again."
"DUHH," I laughed, "I don't WANT to see it again." Shudder.
We all crashed around five in the morning; everyone sprawled all over the floor, and Meghan cuddled up next to Bob. Ooh la la. Frank and I started a little make-out session, but we were too tired to keep it going for long, and besides Gerard kept hitting us.
I woke up a few hours later to see--
OH.
MY.
GOD.
IT'S THAT FUCKING RABBIT!!
I screamed at the top of my lungs and hid behind Frank, almost having a panic attack.
Everyone woke up because of my screamy fit, and the rabbit took off its mask and--
What.The.Fricking.Hell.
"RAYMOND MANUEL TORO-ORTIZ!! I WILL FUCKING MURDER YOU!!" I screamed, jumping up and running after him. "THAT WAS NOT FUNNY!!!"
Ray escaped upstairs into the bathroom, locking the door behind him half a second before I crashed into the door. "ALEX!!" I wailed, stomping back downstairs. "GO KILL YOUR STUPID BOYFRIEND!!"
Alex huggled me, and Frank headed upstairs. "It's okay, sweetie..." Alex tried to comfort me. "He was just kidding...he didn't think it would scare you that bad..."
"WELL IT DID!!!" I sniffled, wiping my eyes. "That butthead."
Frank came back downstairs, dragging a sheepish-looking Ray behind him. "Sorry, Olivia.." Ray wasn't laughing anymore. "I didn't mean to freak you out that bad, honest..."
I sniffed again. "I forgive you..I guess..." Meghan scurried over and whispered something in my ear. I grinned maniacally. "But I demand payback."
Ray's face: O_O
"Come with me, darlings," I smirked, taking Mikey, Chelsea, and Ray upstairs with me. I paused halfway up the stairs. "Gerard? You and Bob come too, we might need your muscle-y-ness." Ray was looking really scared by this time. I whispered my plan to the guys, and they laughed evilly.
"Raymond, dearest..." Gerard grinned, "Come with me..." He and Bob dragged Ray upstairs, with everyone else following, eager to see how we would torture poor Ray-ray.
"Frank!" I started ordering everyone around. "I need bleach. Kay! Go get some dye, lots of colors, the brighter the better. Mikey! Bring your straightener." I tapped my fingers together like the evil genius I am. "Gerard and Bob! Tie down Ray so he can't move...I have plans for his fro."
A look of pure horror was plastered across Ray's face. Muahahaha.
--Time Lapse--
"Okay, guys," I was just toooo pleased with my handiwork, "You can let him look now." They turned his chair around to face the mirror, and a girlish scream escaped his lips.
"WHYYYYY??? WHY MY FRO?!?!?!!!" he shrieked.
Everyone else, even Alex, was rolling on the floor in hysterics. Ray Toro, the Fro man, had his hair straightened, bleached almost white, with bright blue, purple, and pink streaks in it.
"Duuude. My day is accomplished," I announced, giggling like a madman.
Ray fell to his knees, stroking his hair sadly. "I loveded you my fro... I loveded you..."
The nine spazzes=
xD
Ray=
D:
Finally we took pity on him, and we all piled into the car and headed for the hair salon to dye Ray's hair back to brown. That boy has no sense of adventure...bah.
Olivia's POV
"PWNED, SON!!" I shrieked in Ray's face as Bob kicked his butt at Guitar Hero [yet again]. He growled at me. "Wait...RAY! YOU PLAY GUITAR! AND BOB DOESN'T!" I yelled.
"SO WHAT?!?" he yelled back.
"SO HOW COME HE BEAT YOU BY LIKE 50 BAJILLION POINTS? AGAIN?!?" I screamed.
"BECAUSE RAY SUCKS AT THIS GAME!! AND I AM GOD OF GUITAR HERO!!" Bob yelled.
"YOU IDIOTS! WHY ARE YOU YELLING! YOU GUYS ARE LESS THAN THREE FEET APART!!" Chelsea shrieked at us. "PUT DOWN THE FREAKING GUITAR CRAP AND COME EAT THE PIZZA!!!"
We looked at each other, shrugged, and ran for the kitchen. I put three slices of cheese pizza on a plate, set it on the counter, and started rummaging through the cupboards, looking for the magical jar of deliciousness. I know it's here somewhere...
Meghan looked at me oddly. "What'cha looking for?"
"Stuff," I replied, my voice muffled as I was halfway inside a cupboard.
"Stuff?" she repeated dubiously [best word everr].
"Stuff," Frank confirmed.
"What stuff?" she wanted to know.
"Pizza stuff," Alex said knowingly.
"What kind of pizza stuff?" Meghan persisted.
"The Olivia kind of pizza stuff," Bob said, as if that should be obvious.
"And the Olivia kind of pizza stuff is...what?" she asked, getting a bit exasperated.
"FOUND IT!!" I shrieked, then realized I had a problem. "FRANK!!" I squealed. "HELP ME!!"
"Uhh...help you with what?" he asked confuzzledly.
"MY FAT ASS IS STUCK IN THE CUPBOARD DOOR!!" I giggled.
The kitchen burst into laughter. Frank pulled on my feet until I got un-stuck, and I scrambled out of the cupboard, clutching my treasure.
"Pizza stuff!" I announced proudly, and started transforming my pizza. Twizzlers. Skittles. Gummy bears. Chocolate syrup. Everything imaginable went onto that pizza, changing it from boring old cheese pizza to The Greatest Culinary Achievement Known To Humankind.
Meghan looked as if she was going to be sick. "And she actually eats that??" she asked Bob in disbelief.
"Every last bite," he assured her.
"Eeeew." Meghan wrinkled her nose.
I hissed. "Don't insult the Magical Food of the Olivia."
"Yes master," she bowed, giggling.
After we had all got our food and were settled in front of the TV, we had to decide what movie to watch.
"MEN IN TIGHTS!!" I squealed. That movie is fricking hilarious.
"Noooo! Jackass!!" Ray argued.
I pouted, and Frank pulled me in for a hug. "Don't call her names!" Frank barked at Ray.
"I wasn't!" the Fro-man protested. "I meant Jackass, as in, the movie! Y'know, with Johnny Knoxville!"
"Ohhh," Frank and I said, feeling slightly dumb.
"OH EM GEE!!!" Chelsea squealed. "WE SHALL WATCH DONNIE DARKO!!"
"YEAH!!!" everyone agreed, and Mikey went to put it in the DVD player.
--Time Lapse--
"That is the LAST time we are watching that movie with Olivia," Chelsea groaned, prying my fingers off of her arm.
"I agree. Never again," Frank nodded, inspecting the finger-shaped bruises on his arm.
"Sorry..." I whimpered. "It's that fucking bunny, dude. He scares mee."
Frank hugged me. "Still. You are NEVER watching that movie again."
"DUHH," I laughed, "I don't WANT to see it again." Shudder.
We all crashed around five in the morning; everyone sprawled all over the floor, and Meghan cuddled up next to Bob. Ooh la la. Frank and I started a little make-out session, but we were too tired to keep it going for long, and besides Gerard kept hitting us.
I woke up a few hours later to see--
OH.
MY.
GOD.
IT'S THAT FUCKING RABBIT!!
I screamed at the top of my lungs and hid behind Frank, almost having a panic attack.
Everyone woke up because of my screamy fit, and the rabbit took off its mask and--
What.The.Fricking.Hell.
"RAYMOND MANUEL TORO-ORTIZ!! I WILL FUCKING MURDER YOU!!" I screamed, jumping up and running after him. "THAT WAS NOT FUNNY!!!"
Ray escaped upstairs into the bathroom, locking the door behind him half a second before I crashed into the door. "ALEX!!" I wailed, stomping back downstairs. "GO KILL YOUR STUPID BOYFRIEND!!"
Alex huggled me, and Frank headed upstairs. "It's okay, sweetie..." Alex tried to comfort me. "He was just kidding...he didn't think it would scare you that bad..."
"WELL IT DID!!!" I sniffled, wiping my eyes. "That butthead."
Frank came back downstairs, dragging a sheepish-looking Ray behind him. "Sorry, Olivia.." Ray wasn't laughing anymore. "I didn't mean to freak you out that bad, honest..."
I sniffed again. "I forgive you..I guess..." Meghan scurried over and whispered something in my ear. I grinned maniacally. "But I demand payback."
Ray's face: O_O
"Come with me, darlings," I smirked, taking Mikey, Chelsea, and Ray upstairs with me. I paused halfway up the stairs. "Gerard? You and Bob come too, we might need your muscle-y-ness." Ray was looking really scared by this time. I whispered my plan to the guys, and they laughed evilly.
"Raymond, dearest..." Gerard grinned, "Come with me..." He and Bob dragged Ray upstairs, with everyone else following, eager to see how we would torture poor Ray-ray.
"Frank!" I started ordering everyone around. "I need bleach. Kay! Go get some dye, lots of colors, the brighter the better. Mikey! Bring your straightener." I tapped my fingers together like the evil genius I am. "Gerard and Bob! Tie down Ray so he can't move...I have plans for his fro."
A look of pure horror was plastered across Ray's face. Muahahaha.
--Time Lapse--
"Okay, guys," I was just toooo pleased with my handiwork, "You can let him look now." They turned his chair around to face the mirror, and a girlish scream escaped his lips.
"WHYYYYY??? WHY MY FRO?!?!?!!!" he shrieked.
Everyone else, even Alex, was rolling on the floor in hysterics. Ray Toro, the Fro man, had his hair straightened, bleached almost white, with bright blue, purple, and pink streaks in it.
"Duuude. My day is accomplished," I announced, giggling like a madman.
Ray fell to his knees, stroking his hair sadly. "I loveded you my fro... I loveded you..."
The nine spazzes=
xD
Ray=
D:
Finally we took pity on him, and we all piled into the car and headed for the hair salon to dye Ray's hair back to brown. That boy has no sense of adventure...bah.