I Have A Secret, This Is My Confession

I’m in love with my best friend.

I can’t ever tell him either, which is the sad part. It’s not even because he has a girlfriend that I can’t tell him. Telling him wouldn’t change anything. Well, not for the better anyway. The closest I’ll ever get to being with him is the fake engagement we have so my roommate could plan a wedding.

Which, that in itself, makes me a sad human being.

I’m not even sure I really believe in love; or rather believe that I’ll find it. I’m almost scared of relationships and commitment and yet, I seem to fall in love quite easily and often. Only, I fall for people who could never really love me back. Maybe that’s the whole point?

I’m scared of dying alone, but I’m more scared of letting anyone get close to me.