Forgive Me

I sighed, drawing in a breath. I was really starting to show in my pregnancy, now, being six months. I didn’t want to frighten Alex with it, though.

I sat down on the couch, pulling my blanket over top of my stomach and heaved a sigh. I felt enormous; fat. I never wanted to do anything, anymore. I just wanted to eat everything that someone placed in front of me.

Happy, fatty fat fatty? I glared at myself in my mind, shaking my head. My hormones were crazier than I was.

“Lee,” Zack murmured from behind me, causing me to jump slightly, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s fine,” I pushed back my hair, looking at him, “What’s going on?”

Zack was never one to a ton of emotions. When he did, however, it was either bad news or exceedingly good news, “I want you to see this,” he sat his own laptop in my lap, a Youtube video on screen and pressed ‘play’.

Alex smiled at the crowd, strumming a few chords on his guitar, before turning towards Jack, “I think we should play them another song.”

“Me too,” Jack exclaimed excitingly, strumming his own guitar.

Alex started playing the entrance to “Keep the Change, You Filthy Animal” with Rian soon following in. Jack bounced a little, joining in shortly after.

“Now,” Alex breathed, playing the same line over again, “This goes out to my girlfriend, who I thought trusted me. It’s too bad that she wants to listen to her so-called friends over me, though.”

My mouth fell agape, as I watched Zack. He simply nodded, biting his lower lip.

You see, about a month after Mandy had shown me those pictures, I asked Alex about it. He told me that they were no big deal and that I shouldn’t worry. How could I not, though? Teenage girls—who weren’t pregnant or huge—were throwing themselves at him. How was I to know that our relationship was safe or not?

Alex and I had an argument about it. He told me that I “needed to get over my insecure self” and trust him. Honestly, I did try to trust him, until more and more pictures started flooding me. Most of them included him, a girl and a can of beer in hand.

Zack rubbed my back, sighing when I started crying. He pulled me against him, sighing, “I’m sorry you found out about this, this way.”

I shook my head, trying to tell him that I was glad he told me, but it didn’t work. I continued to sob.

“Did you tell her?” Rian sighed, kneeling in front of me.

“Not all of it,” he sighed, rubbing my shoulders.

I looked at them, biting my lip. Did I even want to know?

“He-he,” Rian sighed, shaking his head, “hand a drunken one night stand with a fan, Hailee.”