I Want to Be the Prettiest Wreck You've Ever Seen

I hate crying. It always makes me pass out. Once again, when I woke up, Jackson was gone, but I was in my bed. I sighed and rubbed my dry eyes. I laid in my warm bed for a few minutes before getting up to shower.

I didn’t really put too much effort into my appearance, I stayed in pajama pants, a tank top and a large hoodie, throwing my long, black hair up into a messy bun. I went out to my car and drove to the set. I put my ear buds in my ears and walked to the gate to go inside. There was a new guard at the gate today and he stopped me. I showed him my pass and started to continue.

“I’m sorry, Miss.” He said and I had a sudden flash of déjà vu. I sighed and pulled out my phone and called the first person on my call log-Jackson. It rang a few times before he answered it.

“Hey, pretty” He greeted.

“Hey-are you busy?” I asked.

“No-where are you?” He asked.

“At the front gate. The guard won’t let me in and I’m freezing.” I answered.

“Ok-I’ll be right there.” He said and hung up. I slipped my phone in my pocket and waited for Jackson. The guard eyed me while I waited. I can’t believe I was having this problem again. Did everyone else have this problem? Or was I just the lucky one?

Jackson reached us and clapped the guard on his shoulder.

“She’s allowed in from now on.” He said firmly, taking my hand and leading me inside the gate. He looked at me and chuckled.

“This happens every time.” I muttered. He smiled and rubbed my cold hand in his.

“So where are we going today?” He asked once we were inside.

“Don’t you have filming to do?” I asked timidly. He shook his head, smiling.

“Nope-I’m all yours today.” I smiled at the though and I started to swing our hands.

“I like that.” I said, looking straight ahead.

“Do you?” He asked, bemused.

“Mmm.” I replied absentmindedly. “I’m sorry about last night.” I said. He put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side.

“Don’t be.” He whispered. “Are you feeling ok?” I nodded.

“Yeah, thank you.” I smiled.

“Good.” We started walking around the many hallways, asking random questions. “So what’s your favorite vegetable?” He asked, still laughing from my last answer.

“Um-mashed potatoes?” I guess. He chuckled. “What about yours?” I asked, nudging him.

“Carrots-you can eat them on the go or cooked, regular sized or bite size.

“You can do the same with broccoli.” I laughed.

“Alright, miss smarty pants.” He smirked. “Favorite soda.” He said.

“Root beer.” I smiled. “Yours?” He looked at me and just smiled.

“Same.”

“Liar.” I laughed.

“I’m serious!” He led me into the library and I sat on one of the long tables, laying down. He took his spot, sitting, on the table next to mine.

“Ok-if you could have one thing what would it be?” I asked, looking at him. He stared at me for a second before shaking his head, as if clearing his thoughts.

“I’d have to say a black, Gibson Flying V electric guitar.” He said. I chuckled. “I’ve wanted one ever since I learned how to play.” He said, holding my gaze. “What’s so funny?” He asked, frowning.

“You remind me of Ralphie from A Christmas Story.” I said, my hands resting on my flat stomach.

“Oh-with the air rifle?” He clarified, chuckling.

“Yeah!” I said, excited that he knew what I was talking about. “I love that movie.” I sighed.

“You’re adorable.” He laughed. I was about to protest but he spoke again. “What’s your favorite movie?” He asked. I wondered what was with the twenty questions, but I wasn’t complaining.

“The Princess Bride.” I said promptly. I absolutely loved it.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard of it.” He said. I gasped and sat up, looking at him.

“No way!” I said incredulously. “Inconceivable.” I said, quoting from the movie unintentionally.

“Sorry.” He said.

“Well, you’ll just have to watch it.” I said simply.

“Will you watch it with me?” He asked. I pretended to have to think about it but the truth was-I’d love nothing more.

“Eh-“ I shrugged. “I guess so.” I said casually. He laughed.

We asked each other random questions about everything possible over the next three days. It was now just two weeks from his birthday and Christmas. We still hadn’t watched the movie yet and we were still asking questions. We were in the cafeteria eating lunch when he asked a question that made me choke on my water.

“Have you ever been in love?” He asked, just as I took a sip. Do I lie? Do I say ‘Yes-with you’? No-that’s just cheesy. ‘Just be vague.’

“Just once.” I said. He frowned a little. “What about you?” I asked.

“Same-only once.” He muttered.

“Was it worth it?” I asked. He raised his eyes to mine as if to ask if something was obvious but I just watched him, waiting for his answer.

“One hundred percent.” He said finally. My heart sank slightly. I never had a chance with him. There was no way I would be able to compete with this other girl-I was just me, plain, simple and boring.

“You?” He asked softly, bringing me out of my thoughts. I looked at him.

“I’m sorry, what?” I asked.

“Was he worth it?” He asked again, the words seemed difficult for him to say. I just nodded. Jackson was completely worth it.

Despite the fact that I knew I had no chance with this amazing guy-I was drawn to him like a moth to a flame. I was only torturing myself, the more time I spent with him. I was falling harder as the days passed and I wondered if I was ever going to reach the bottom.

The day after he told me the only thing he wanted, I was late getting to the set. I was online ordering his guitar after my shower.

I skipped to the library to see if he was there but the room was empty. I paused at the door, frowning. I was thinking up reasons why he wouldn’t be there: bathroom, filming, sick, or worse-he was bored with me. I shuddered at the last thought when a pair of hands covered my eyes-taking me by surprise. I instantly recognized the touch, though, holding me so gently-as if I would break. I made no effort to remove his hands, I simply held mine over his, savoring the warm sensation of his skin on mine. I was content to stand like this all day, just so long as he was near me.

“You’re late.” He commented after a long moment.

“Sorry.” I mumbled, having a hard time focusing.

“What’s the matter?” He asked, removing his hands to look at me. I just smiled at him.

“Absolutely nothing.” I said. He eyed me as if I was lying. What could be wrong when he was around? Nothing-that’s what. “I promise.” I smiled wider.

“You’re so strange. He sighed, putting his arm around my shoulders. I just smiled at him.

From that day to until the day before his birthday we were attached at the hip unless he was filming. We were almost always together. I still hung out with the others as well. I finished my Christmas shopping after filming hours, usually with one of the girls or Rob, since they knew the shopping areas better than I did.

The day before Jackson’s birthday his guitar arrived just as I was about to leave. I debated staying home to get everything ready but I really wanted to see Jackson. So I pulled it inside and drove to the set lot.