I Want to Be the Prettiest Wreck You've Ever Seen
Chapter Six: Thanksgiving Plans
After we got subway we went home and I took my Advil and climbed into bed. Kevin stayed with me for a while until I fell asleep. I vaguely felt him leave my side, but in my dream I registered it as a ship rocking-dreams are strange.
I don’t know how long I slept but I felt my bed shift by my knees like someone sat down. I managed to pull myself out of dream-land long enough to roll over and see Jackson watching me worriedly. My heart lifted as soon as I saw his face and I couldn’t help but smile at him.
“Hi.” I said tiredly, rolling back over. He didn’t answer right away and I looked back at him to he hadn’t moved. I poked his arm to make sure he was really there and I wasn’t dreaming him. He blinked.
“Just making sure you’re real.” I said sweetly. He just shook his head. “Jackson-are you alright?” I asked-his silence was making me nervous. He was still quiet. “Please say something.” I whispered. He quickly pulled me into a tight hug which took me by surprised but I hugged him back anyways.
“You were in the hospital and you want to know if I’m ok?” He repeated. I smiled into his shoulder.
“Mhm.” I said comfortably. He pulled me away from him and I pouted a little.
“Why?” He asked. I settled back into my pillows, relaxed but excited. Relaxed because I knew he was alright, but excited because he was here with me. I’ve got it bad.
“Because you weren’t saying anything and I had two options. Option one-I dreamed you. And option two-something was wrong.” I said.
“How do you know it wasn’t option one?” He asked.
“Because if I dreamed you-you’d be talking.” I said without thinking and instantly wished I could take it back.
“Why?” He asked, gently taking my hand.
“Because I love your voice.” I sighed. I had no secrets from him.
“Hmmm.” He mused.
“So what was wrong?” I asked, getting back to the point.
“I was worried about you. Kevin told us what happened.” He said quietly.
“You were worried about me?” I asked, yawning with a squeak at the end. He chuckled.
“Yeah. And I wanted to come see if you were ok.”
“I’m good.” I said. “A little thirsty, though.” I said, starting to get up. He pushed me back gently.
“I’ll get it.” He said. “Anything else?”
“That Advil-it should be on the counter.” I said. He smiled before disappearing out the door. I focused on getting my heart under control. He came back a few minutes later carrying a glass of water and the bottle of Advil. He set them on my night stand to help me sit up. I counted out four of the pills and he cocked an eyebrow at me.
“Doctor’s orders.” I said before swallowing them. He sat on the edge of my bed and I moved over so he could have more room. He watched me for a second before taking my hand again.
“What is it?” I asked softly. He smiled to himself, not sharing the little joke. His face became serious again.
“Kevin said you were in a lot of pain.” He said quietly.
“Eh.” I said, playing it off. He didn’t need to know.
“Please tell me the truth.” He whispered, his green eyes meeting mine. I sighed-apparently he did have to know.
“Yeah…pain.” I mumbled.
“How much?” He pressed, tracing soft lines on my palm.
“You don’t want to know.” I said.
“That bad?” He asked, looking at me. I nodded. “Tell me.”
“Will you lay with me for a while?” I asked suddenly. I wanted his arms around me.
“If you tell me.” He agreed. I moved over more so he could lay next to me. He did and I curled up against his firm torso as he wrapped his arms around me comfortably.
“It felt like…I was being stabbed…but from the inside.” I said quietly, tracing small circles on his flat stomach. His arms tightened around me. “Like I was being ripped apart from the inside out.” I whispered. He hugged me to him and then quickly let go.
“That doesn’t hurt, right?” He asked cautiously.
“No. The pain is pretty much all gone.” I said.
“I’m so sorry, Maggie.” He whispered. I looked up at him.
“It’s not your fault.” I said.
“I wish I could help.” He said, ignoring me. I tapped my finger in the middle of his chest until I was sure he was actually seeing me.
“You are helping.” I said. He smiled.
“You sure?”
“Positive.” I yawned.
“Get some sleep, angel.” He said and the butterflies were off like a rocket. He pulled me closer and started humming the song he had been playing on the guitar and soon I had fallen asleep in Jackson’s arms.
When I finally woke up-I was alone in my bed.
“Jackson?” I called. I checked my cell phone and realized it was the next day and now exactly one week until my birthday. I rolled over, stretching and saw a piece of paper on my night stand. I picked it up and squinted my eyes, reading it.
Hey beautiful,
I’m sorry I couldn’t be there when you woke up.
I was needed on set.
I hope you feel better-I’ll see you later.
Love,
Jackson.
I let out a squeak and pulled my blankets over my face. My sheets smelled like him. I laid there for a few more minutes before getting up and getting into the shower. I washed my hair and shaved my legs only nicking myself once.
I got dressed in a denim skirt and a tank top. I pulled on a form fitting zip up hoodie and laced up my cons. I put my hair up in a bun, put my glasses on, grabbed my keys, cell, purse and iPod before walking out to my car. Snow was falling as I pulled out of the garage and I let out a groan. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to deal with this stuff yet.
I reached the lot and walked inside, shivering uncontrollably. I was walking around for a few minutes, looking for people, when my phone buzzed in the pocket of my hoodie. I flipped it open to see a text message from Rob.
I see you!
I laughed and turned around to see him grinning. I waved and waited for him to catch up. I linked my arm with his as we walked in silence for a few seconds.
“Hey-random question.” I said, hoping to avoid the topic of the past two days.
“Sure.” He chuckled.
“Since you’re British-does that mean you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving?” I asked. He laughed.
“No-I don’t.” He said, watching me.
“Well-you can’t just be alone.” I said sadly. I didn’t like to think of him home alone while everyone else was out.
“Why not?” He asked.
“Because I don’t like it.” I said. “You should come over with me and Kevin. I’m cooking and it’s way too much for just the two of us.” I said. “You don’t have to celebrate-just eat.” I reasoned. He smiled.
“If that’s what you want.”
“It is.” I said firmly. He put his arms around me from behind as we entered the cafeteria. He steered me over to where Kellan was sitting. He looked at me for a second.
“Oh my God!” He said loudly before jumping up and hugging me tightly. “You’re alive!” He said.
“Let me go or I won’t be.” I choked out, gasping for air. He dropped me quickly and I stumbled backwards into someone who caught me gently.
“Sorry!” I said, turning to see Taylor. He grinned and hugged me carefully.
“You ok?” He asked as I sat back down. He sat next to me as I nodded.
“Good as new.” I said brightly.
“Good.” He said. I heard a loud squeak behind me as someone wrapped their arms around my neck from behind.
“Oh my gosh! What are you doing up?” I heard Ashley ask.
“I slept for two days. I need to be up.” I said. Nikki sat next to Rob and smiled at me.
“Glad to see you look better.” She said. I smiled as Ashley kissed my cheek and sat between Taylor and Kellan.
“Me, too.” I laughed.
“You shouldn’t be stressing yourself, though.” Ashley said.
“I’m not. I can walk around. I’m just not allowed to do lifting or anything like that.” I said.
“Good. So you do need me.” Kellan said, winking.
“Of course.” I said honestly and he grinned. “How else would I feel smart?” I asked, smirking. He crumpled up his napkin and threw it at me. I laughed and put my warm face on the cool table.
“You ok?” Rob asked, rubbing my back. I nodded and sat up.
“So what’s everyone doing for Thanksgiving?” I asked.
“My parents are going on a cruise-so…nothing.” Ashley said.
“My parents are going to Europe for their second honeymoon.” Nikki said.
“My parents are…” Kellan started, then paused dramatically. “Fighting-so I’m staying here, too.” I smiled apologetically. We all looked at Taylor.
“I’m going home for the day.” He said. They all looked at me.
“What? Oh-I’m cooking, making Rob come over and Kevin is…well, who knows. You guys should all come.” I said. “Since you’ll be here anyways.” I said.
“You sure?” Ashley asked. I nodded. “It won’t be too much stress?”
“No. I promise.”
“Alright.” I smiled.
“Good.” Jackson walked in the door that goes directly outside and headed our way. I smiled at him, even though today he wouldn’t be speaking to me.
“Hey-look who’s awake!” He grinned. I laughed, a little surprised.
“Yeah, finally.” I said.
“Jay, what are you doing for Thanksgiving?” Kellan asked.
“Oh-I’m going home. My mom’s cooking and then I’m bringing my girlfriend back here for a week.” He said. My heart skipped a beat, stuttered and then stopped all together. Girlfriend?
I was the first one to recover: “Have fun.” I said, my voice surprisingly strong. He looked at me for a second before smiling.
“Thanks.” He said. My phone buzzed in my pocket.
“’Scuse me.” I mumbled and walked quickly out of the room, looking at the caller ID: Jut Calling.
“Low?” I answered.
“Hey-how’s it going?” He asked cheerfully.
“Alright-yourself?” I asked dully.
“Well-alright, but I have some bad news.” He said quietly.
“Oh?”
“Yeah-turns out I can’t come until around Christmas.” He said.
“Oh.” I said simply. “Why?”
“Well-the parental units are going to spend Christmas with Karen so they want me there for Thanksgiving and then to help with rebuilding stuff-you know my dad. And that’s the end of my vacation.” He explained.
“Oh-alright. Well, good luck with the construction.” I said.
“Thanks. I’ll call you later.” He said and before I could say OK he had hung up. I sighed and headed back for the cafeteria, feeling like today just got worse and worse, like a game of Tetris gone bad.
I dropped into my chair and let my head fall loudly onto the table.
“How’d that feel?” Kellan laughed.
“Fucking super.” I muttered.
“What’s wrong?” Ashley asked. I lifted my head to see Jackson still there, talking to Nikki, but now everyone was watching me. I sighed.
“Nothing. Sorry I swore at you.” I said to Kellan. He shrugged, watching me carefully.
“It happens.” He said. I could tell Ashley was about to ask again so I picked up my purse.
“I’m gonna go for a walk.” I said, standing up and walking out the door. I brushed past Cam and kept walking down the hallways, hoping to get lost. I rounded a corner and ran directly into Kevin. He caught me before I could fall backwards. I brushed off my cheeks as I looked to the floor, avoiding meeting his gaze.
“What’s wrong?” He asked.
“Justin can’t come visit and Jackson has a girlfriend.” I said, my voice breaking. He just hugged me and I was sure he was feeling awkward and wasn’t sure what to say.
“I thought you didn’t like Justin.” He said finally.
“I don’t.” I said, a sob escaping before I could stop it and I bit down hard on my lip to stop any more. He seemed confused so he just hugged me to him and rubbed my back.
“Is she ok?” I heard Rob ask from behind me. I stepped back and wiped my eyes as best I could before turning to face him. They were still threatening to spill over.
“Fine.” I mumbled. I looked at Kevin and he looked pained.
“I’ll take it from here, Kevin.” Rob said politely. Kevin nodded and kissed the top of my head before walking away. Rob watched him until he was gone before turning to me.
“Is this about Jackson?” He asked as the tears started again. I shook my head as he led me towards the bleachers. I blew out a sigh, trying to control my breathing.
“Kind of.” I said. “It’s not the whole thing, but definitely a part of it.” I said, as he pushed the door open. I could feel the snowy air on my face. He paused and looked at me before leading me in another direction.
“Well, tell me the whole thing.” He said softly. I took a deep breath and looked at him. “Take your time.” He led me into the empty library and looked around, trying to decide where to sit. I led him over to a padded couch and he sat first. I curled up next to him and rested my head against his chest.
“Being in the hospital the other day freaked me out.” I started. “Then Jackson’s girlfriend. And my friend, Justin, just called me. He was supposed to come visit me for my birthday but now he can’t.” I sighed. “And I know it’s stupid-but he hung up on me, before I could say goodbye, like he couldn’t wait to stop talking to me.” I said pathetically. He rested his mouth against the top of my head.
“I’m sorry, Maggie.” He whispered. I played with his hand.
“You guys are spoiling me.” I said quietly.
“What? Why?” He stuttered.
“You’re too good to me.” I said. “You treat me better than people I’ve known my whole life.”
“Well, that’s because we get to see you through fresh eyes.” He explained. “So everything you do is just who you are.” He said. I looked at him.
“I box.” I said suddenly. He blinked.
“You what?” He asked carefully.
“Well, I used to. With Justin.” I amended. “Does that change me?” I asked. He shook his head.
“No-it just let’s me know you a little better.” He paused. “Were you any good?” He asked.
“Yeah. I didn’t compete or anything. I just had a lot of anger.” I said, chuckling. “I started with a punching bag but then I met Justin and he let me practice on him.” I said. “And…” Then we went out I thought bitterly. “And then he made a good target for my anger.” I finished. If he was confused-he didn’t say anything about it.
“Is that why you asked if you acted like a girl? Because you boxed?” He asked. I nodded-kind of.
“But Monica-oh-she was perfect. She did gymnastics-a girl sport.” I said sarcastically. “’Why can’t you do something lady-like, like your sister? Boxing is so…vile.’” I mumbled, quoting my mom. “’Because, mom, I’d fall and break my face.’ ‘Oh-because you don’t do that when you hit people?’ ‘Well, yeah-but at least it’s not my fault that way.’ ‘Scoff.’” I quoted just one of many fights I had had with my mother. We were quiet for a few minutes.
“Thank you.” I sighed. I felt him look at me, surprised.
“For what?”
“Letting me vent.” I whispered. He laced his fingers with mine.
“It’s what I’m here for.” I smiled as he gently raised my hand to his mouth, kissing the back of it. “So why isn’t Justin coming to visit?” He asked after a few minutes. I scoffed.
“He said his mom wants him to help with repairs around the house because his dad doesn’t do them. But since Justin wouldn’t know a hammer from a screwdriver-he’s probably got some girl he’s shacking up with and he can’t be bothered with me.” I said, knowing it was most likely the truth.
I don’t know how long I slept but I felt my bed shift by my knees like someone sat down. I managed to pull myself out of dream-land long enough to roll over and see Jackson watching me worriedly. My heart lifted as soon as I saw his face and I couldn’t help but smile at him.
“Hi.” I said tiredly, rolling back over. He didn’t answer right away and I looked back at him to he hadn’t moved. I poked his arm to make sure he was really there and I wasn’t dreaming him. He blinked.
“Just making sure you’re real.” I said sweetly. He just shook his head. “Jackson-are you alright?” I asked-his silence was making me nervous. He was still quiet. “Please say something.” I whispered. He quickly pulled me into a tight hug which took me by surprised but I hugged him back anyways.
“You were in the hospital and you want to know if I’m ok?” He repeated. I smiled into his shoulder.
“Mhm.” I said comfortably. He pulled me away from him and I pouted a little.
“Why?” He asked. I settled back into my pillows, relaxed but excited. Relaxed because I knew he was alright, but excited because he was here with me. I’ve got it bad.
“Because you weren’t saying anything and I had two options. Option one-I dreamed you. And option two-something was wrong.” I said.
“How do you know it wasn’t option one?” He asked.
“Because if I dreamed you-you’d be talking.” I said without thinking and instantly wished I could take it back.
“Why?” He asked, gently taking my hand.
“Because I love your voice.” I sighed. I had no secrets from him.
“Hmmm.” He mused.
“So what was wrong?” I asked, getting back to the point.
“I was worried about you. Kevin told us what happened.” He said quietly.
“You were worried about me?” I asked, yawning with a squeak at the end. He chuckled.
“Yeah. And I wanted to come see if you were ok.”
“I’m good.” I said. “A little thirsty, though.” I said, starting to get up. He pushed me back gently.
“I’ll get it.” He said. “Anything else?”
“That Advil-it should be on the counter.” I said. He smiled before disappearing out the door. I focused on getting my heart under control. He came back a few minutes later carrying a glass of water and the bottle of Advil. He set them on my night stand to help me sit up. I counted out four of the pills and he cocked an eyebrow at me.
“Doctor’s orders.” I said before swallowing them. He sat on the edge of my bed and I moved over so he could have more room. He watched me for a second before taking my hand again.
“What is it?” I asked softly. He smiled to himself, not sharing the little joke. His face became serious again.
“Kevin said you were in a lot of pain.” He said quietly.
“Eh.” I said, playing it off. He didn’t need to know.
“Please tell me the truth.” He whispered, his green eyes meeting mine. I sighed-apparently he did have to know.
“Yeah…pain.” I mumbled.
“How much?” He pressed, tracing soft lines on my palm.
“You don’t want to know.” I said.
“That bad?” He asked, looking at me. I nodded. “Tell me.”
“Will you lay with me for a while?” I asked suddenly. I wanted his arms around me.
“If you tell me.” He agreed. I moved over more so he could lay next to me. He did and I curled up against his firm torso as he wrapped his arms around me comfortably.
“It felt like…I was being stabbed…but from the inside.” I said quietly, tracing small circles on his flat stomach. His arms tightened around me. “Like I was being ripped apart from the inside out.” I whispered. He hugged me to him and then quickly let go.
“That doesn’t hurt, right?” He asked cautiously.
“No. The pain is pretty much all gone.” I said.
“I’m so sorry, Maggie.” He whispered. I looked up at him.
“It’s not your fault.” I said.
“I wish I could help.” He said, ignoring me. I tapped my finger in the middle of his chest until I was sure he was actually seeing me.
“You are helping.” I said. He smiled.
“You sure?”
“Positive.” I yawned.
“Get some sleep, angel.” He said and the butterflies were off like a rocket. He pulled me closer and started humming the song he had been playing on the guitar and soon I had fallen asleep in Jackson’s arms.
When I finally woke up-I was alone in my bed.
“Jackson?” I called. I checked my cell phone and realized it was the next day and now exactly one week until my birthday. I rolled over, stretching and saw a piece of paper on my night stand. I picked it up and squinted my eyes, reading it.
Hey beautiful,
I’m sorry I couldn’t be there when you woke up.
I was needed on set.
I hope you feel better-I’ll see you later.
Love,
Jackson.
I let out a squeak and pulled my blankets over my face. My sheets smelled like him. I laid there for a few more minutes before getting up and getting into the shower. I washed my hair and shaved my legs only nicking myself once.
I got dressed in a denim skirt and a tank top. I pulled on a form fitting zip up hoodie and laced up my cons. I put my hair up in a bun, put my glasses on, grabbed my keys, cell, purse and iPod before walking out to my car. Snow was falling as I pulled out of the garage and I let out a groan. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to deal with this stuff yet.
I reached the lot and walked inside, shivering uncontrollably. I was walking around for a few minutes, looking for people, when my phone buzzed in the pocket of my hoodie. I flipped it open to see a text message from Rob.
I see you!
I laughed and turned around to see him grinning. I waved and waited for him to catch up. I linked my arm with his as we walked in silence for a few seconds.
“Hey-random question.” I said, hoping to avoid the topic of the past two days.
“Sure.” He chuckled.
“Since you’re British-does that mean you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving?” I asked. He laughed.
“No-I don’t.” He said, watching me.
“Well-you can’t just be alone.” I said sadly. I didn’t like to think of him home alone while everyone else was out.
“Why not?” He asked.
“Because I don’t like it.” I said. “You should come over with me and Kevin. I’m cooking and it’s way too much for just the two of us.” I said. “You don’t have to celebrate-just eat.” I reasoned. He smiled.
“If that’s what you want.”
“It is.” I said firmly. He put his arms around me from behind as we entered the cafeteria. He steered me over to where Kellan was sitting. He looked at me for a second.
“Oh my God!” He said loudly before jumping up and hugging me tightly. “You’re alive!” He said.
“Let me go or I won’t be.” I choked out, gasping for air. He dropped me quickly and I stumbled backwards into someone who caught me gently.
“Sorry!” I said, turning to see Taylor. He grinned and hugged me carefully.
“You ok?” He asked as I sat back down. He sat next to me as I nodded.
“Good as new.” I said brightly.
“Good.” He said. I heard a loud squeak behind me as someone wrapped their arms around my neck from behind.
“Oh my gosh! What are you doing up?” I heard Ashley ask.
“I slept for two days. I need to be up.” I said. Nikki sat next to Rob and smiled at me.
“Glad to see you look better.” She said. I smiled as Ashley kissed my cheek and sat between Taylor and Kellan.
“Me, too.” I laughed.
“You shouldn’t be stressing yourself, though.” Ashley said.
“I’m not. I can walk around. I’m just not allowed to do lifting or anything like that.” I said.
“Good. So you do need me.” Kellan said, winking.
“Of course.” I said honestly and he grinned. “How else would I feel smart?” I asked, smirking. He crumpled up his napkin and threw it at me. I laughed and put my warm face on the cool table.
“You ok?” Rob asked, rubbing my back. I nodded and sat up.
“So what’s everyone doing for Thanksgiving?” I asked.
“My parents are going on a cruise-so…nothing.” Ashley said.
“My parents are going to Europe for their second honeymoon.” Nikki said.
“My parents are…” Kellan started, then paused dramatically. “Fighting-so I’m staying here, too.” I smiled apologetically. We all looked at Taylor.
“I’m going home for the day.” He said. They all looked at me.
“What? Oh-I’m cooking, making Rob come over and Kevin is…well, who knows. You guys should all come.” I said. “Since you’ll be here anyways.” I said.
“You sure?” Ashley asked. I nodded. “It won’t be too much stress?”
“No. I promise.”
“Alright.” I smiled.
“Good.” Jackson walked in the door that goes directly outside and headed our way. I smiled at him, even though today he wouldn’t be speaking to me.
“Hey-look who’s awake!” He grinned. I laughed, a little surprised.
“Yeah, finally.” I said.
“Jay, what are you doing for Thanksgiving?” Kellan asked.
“Oh-I’m going home. My mom’s cooking and then I’m bringing my girlfriend back here for a week.” He said. My heart skipped a beat, stuttered and then stopped all together. Girlfriend?
I was the first one to recover: “Have fun.” I said, my voice surprisingly strong. He looked at me for a second before smiling.
“Thanks.” He said. My phone buzzed in my pocket.
“’Scuse me.” I mumbled and walked quickly out of the room, looking at the caller ID: Jut Calling.
“Low?” I answered.
“Hey-how’s it going?” He asked cheerfully.
“Alright-yourself?” I asked dully.
“Well-alright, but I have some bad news.” He said quietly.
“Oh?”
“Yeah-turns out I can’t come until around Christmas.” He said.
“Oh.” I said simply. “Why?”
“Well-the parental units are going to spend Christmas with Karen so they want me there for Thanksgiving and then to help with rebuilding stuff-you know my dad. And that’s the end of my vacation.” He explained.
“Oh-alright. Well, good luck with the construction.” I said.
“Thanks. I’ll call you later.” He said and before I could say OK he had hung up. I sighed and headed back for the cafeteria, feeling like today just got worse and worse, like a game of Tetris gone bad.
I dropped into my chair and let my head fall loudly onto the table.
“How’d that feel?” Kellan laughed.
“Fucking super.” I muttered.
“What’s wrong?” Ashley asked. I lifted my head to see Jackson still there, talking to Nikki, but now everyone was watching me. I sighed.
“Nothing. Sorry I swore at you.” I said to Kellan. He shrugged, watching me carefully.
“It happens.” He said. I could tell Ashley was about to ask again so I picked up my purse.
“I’m gonna go for a walk.” I said, standing up and walking out the door. I brushed past Cam and kept walking down the hallways, hoping to get lost. I rounded a corner and ran directly into Kevin. He caught me before I could fall backwards. I brushed off my cheeks as I looked to the floor, avoiding meeting his gaze.
“What’s wrong?” He asked.
“Justin can’t come visit and Jackson has a girlfriend.” I said, my voice breaking. He just hugged me and I was sure he was feeling awkward and wasn’t sure what to say.
“I thought you didn’t like Justin.” He said finally.
“I don’t.” I said, a sob escaping before I could stop it and I bit down hard on my lip to stop any more. He seemed confused so he just hugged me to him and rubbed my back.
“Is she ok?” I heard Rob ask from behind me. I stepped back and wiped my eyes as best I could before turning to face him. They were still threatening to spill over.
“Fine.” I mumbled. I looked at Kevin and he looked pained.
“I’ll take it from here, Kevin.” Rob said politely. Kevin nodded and kissed the top of my head before walking away. Rob watched him until he was gone before turning to me.
“Is this about Jackson?” He asked as the tears started again. I shook my head as he led me towards the bleachers. I blew out a sigh, trying to control my breathing.
“Kind of.” I said. “It’s not the whole thing, but definitely a part of it.” I said, as he pushed the door open. I could feel the snowy air on my face. He paused and looked at me before leading me in another direction.
“Well, tell me the whole thing.” He said softly. I took a deep breath and looked at him. “Take your time.” He led me into the empty library and looked around, trying to decide where to sit. I led him over to a padded couch and he sat first. I curled up next to him and rested my head against his chest.
“Being in the hospital the other day freaked me out.” I started. “Then Jackson’s girlfriend. And my friend, Justin, just called me. He was supposed to come visit me for my birthday but now he can’t.” I sighed. “And I know it’s stupid-but he hung up on me, before I could say goodbye, like he couldn’t wait to stop talking to me.” I said pathetically. He rested his mouth against the top of my head.
“I’m sorry, Maggie.” He whispered. I played with his hand.
“You guys are spoiling me.” I said quietly.
“What? Why?” He stuttered.
“You’re too good to me.” I said. “You treat me better than people I’ve known my whole life.”
“Well, that’s because we get to see you through fresh eyes.” He explained. “So everything you do is just who you are.” He said. I looked at him.
“I box.” I said suddenly. He blinked.
“You what?” He asked carefully.
“Well, I used to. With Justin.” I amended. “Does that change me?” I asked. He shook his head.
“No-it just let’s me know you a little better.” He paused. “Were you any good?” He asked.
“Yeah. I didn’t compete or anything. I just had a lot of anger.” I said, chuckling. “I started with a punching bag but then I met Justin and he let me practice on him.” I said. “And…” Then we went out I thought bitterly. “And then he made a good target for my anger.” I finished. If he was confused-he didn’t say anything about it.
“Is that why you asked if you acted like a girl? Because you boxed?” He asked. I nodded-kind of.
“But Monica-oh-she was perfect. She did gymnastics-a girl sport.” I said sarcastically. “’Why can’t you do something lady-like, like your sister? Boxing is so…vile.’” I mumbled, quoting my mom. “’Because, mom, I’d fall and break my face.’ ‘Oh-because you don’t do that when you hit people?’ ‘Well, yeah-but at least it’s not my fault that way.’ ‘Scoff.’” I quoted just one of many fights I had had with my mother. We were quiet for a few minutes.
“Thank you.” I sighed. I felt him look at me, surprised.
“For what?”
“Letting me vent.” I whispered. He laced his fingers with mine.
“It’s what I’m here for.” I smiled as he gently raised my hand to his mouth, kissing the back of it. “So why isn’t Justin coming to visit?” He asked after a few minutes. I scoffed.
“He said his mom wants him to help with repairs around the house because his dad doesn’t do them. But since Justin wouldn’t know a hammer from a screwdriver-he’s probably got some girl he’s shacking up with and he can’t be bothered with me.” I said, knowing it was most likely the truth.