If It Hurts This Much Then It Must Be Love

Callie didn’t speak, she didn’t cry – she didn’t move. The tears just wouldn’t stop rolling from my eyes I knew how pathetic I probably looked now but the alcohol gave me that ‘who cares’ feeling. The silence was cut as Callie let out a heavy breath before she spoke

“So you know.” Was all she said, her voice didn’t waver she didn’t even sound sorry.

“Know what? That you’re with Stephen? That we aren’t together anymore? When were you going to tell me or were you just going to leave and I was to guess?” I shouted, making the veins on my face stand out.

“Alex you have to understand you were my first boyfriend, it was obvious we weren’t going to be forever, I just don’t love you anymore.” She replied no sense of remorse; what do I see in this girl – I have no clue but I still loved her deep down, so much that it hurt.

In her reply she hadn’t answered in of the questions she had told me something that was easy enough to guess.

“How long has this been going on?” I growled.

“Since your last tour I think.” She replied.

The tiny shattered pieces of my heart shattered into even smaller pieces – all this time she had been stringing me on. It at least gave me answers to a lot of my unanswered questions I’d had through the past couple of months.

I tried to speak but no words came out, I wanted to be harsh I wanted to scream but I loved her. My brain was telling me to let her go, my shattered heart wanted me to get on my knees and beg – I couldn’t think.

“I’ll go get my clothes and leave then” Callie said as she began to walk past me.

I nodded in response, I stared at the wall opposite me not thinking of anything in particular I was done with thinking. Callie only took about twenty minutes to get everything she needed, or wanted in a rucksack and soon she was back downstairs.

“Leave your keys” I spoke, my eyes closed tightly.

I didn’t want to see her for fear that my heart would take over and I would be on my hands and knees grovelling for her love. I heard the sound of the keys touching the couch near mean and then her feet shuffled towards the door.

“I did love you Alex, never forget that please!” she whispered, the only hint of remorse I had heard from her all day.

Seconds later the door closed behind her and she was gone.

I opened my eyes and peered into the bottle, I quickly downed the remaining contents – which there were very little of – and I held the bottle in my hand for a few seconds. Suddenly my brain took control and I threw the bottle towards the wall. It hit of the brown wallpaper and fell to the ground – more broken glass lay over the floor.