Don't Give up on Me

“What did you just…?” My eyes grew wide and I began to worry that she’d freak out. Her mouth was open pretty wide and I looked over at Danny, beginning to stutter. Rachel tilted her head to the side, confusion wiping over her features. “Niccy, what did you just…say?” Rachel asked again and I felt my face turn red. I needed to change the subject, right now.

“I…I though you were at the movies…with Dougie?” I asked, playing with my fingers. Rachel shook her head slowly.

“The movie we wanted to see was sold out. Niccy, I’m serious…What did you just say?” Rachel whispered, looking over to Danny with a glare, as if it were his fault. I looked at him, too, trying to come up with a lie. I knew that it would be really hard to convince her of something different. But I had to try, right? I couldn’t tell her…not yet at least. I looked back at my best friend, the upset look in her eyes getting

“What? That I said ‘the results of being present’?” I said, tilting my head to the side as if I were confused. Rachel’s expression quickly drifted to confusion. “Like, I was telling Danny about how we went to school together and that we used to hang out every day. But since you’ve moved, it’s different. I hate the present because of it.” I explained, hoping to get her to understand my lie. She slowly started to nod, and I sighed in relief. “Why, what’d you think I said?”

“Oh! Wow, I thought you said you were pregnant.” Rachel explained, letting out a loud laugh. I laughed too, as if it were the most ridiculous thing in the world. Danny started to laugh too, walking over and leaning on the wall. He looked to me and shook his head when Rachel wasn’t looking. He was dissatisfied.

“Rac-” Danny began, and I jumped forward, covering his mouth. I shook my head slowly.

“Danny, no. I have to tell her. Not you.” I whispered, turning to Rachel. It was as if she hadn’t even noticed, either. She was still laughing her head off, which, honestly, hurt me inside.

“If you said you were pregnant…I don’t know what I’d do… I mean, you’re way too young! Disappointed would be the right word. Man, don’t scare me like that again!” Rachel explained, and I looked over at Danny. I tried to hold back my tears, instead trying to laugh too as Rachel busted out laughing. Danny looked sympathetic at me, and I just shook my head. I knew it. “Well, the four of us are going to start a movie downstairs, care to join?” Rachel asked, and I nodded slowly.

“Sure, I’ll be down in a minute.” I said, and so Rachel disappeared down to the living room. I closed my bedroom door and turned to Danny, tears slipping from my puffy eyes. “See, Danny.” I whispered, “This is why.” I whispered. “This is why I can’t tell her.”